Two things woke me up.
1. The Kingdom Ministry insert about blood fractions, which was around 2002 I think. This opened up so many issues for me about the blood policy particularly as I served in helping on the patient support team of the HLC.
2. The Panorama TV program about child abuse handling and my family experience and later dealings as an elder.
My waking up was the most painful experience of my life and the pain still arises. I am most grateful for the internet and early brave individuals who helped to provide information.
The most useful book I read, early on, to help me get answers and some structure was The Crisis Of Conscience.