Posts by Prisca

66

What's The Worst Experience You've Ever Had To Deal With In Your Life?

by minimus in

jw
friends

was it jw related?

a death?

a friendship gone bad?

Prisca

Where do you want me to start?

Watching my mother progressively get sicker and sicker from cancer for 7 years

Seeing her die in the hospital when I was 11 - she was already unconscious by the time we got to the hospital so I never had the chance to properly say goodbye

Father remarrying 7 years later to a woman who has deep mental and emotional problems - she despised my father having anything to do with me or my sister so...

....I was kicked out of home when I was 18 and unemployed - had to pick up all my clothes from garbage bags left in the garage. The locks to the house were also changed. If I had to pick up anything that had been forgotten, I would have to ring to make an appointment to pick it up - so they wouldn't be home when I turned up

Constantly being shunned by said father and step-monster. At the meetings she would literally turn her back on us so she wouldn't have to see us in the Hall

They moved out of town, but had a garage sale shortly before - neither my sister nor I knew anything about the garage sale - I would have bought back things that used to belong to my mother.

Not having a father the past 15 years

Learning the "truth" was all lies

Having a JW fiance who cheated on me with a one-night-stand - and got her pregnant

Deciding to leave the "truth" and leave my fiance for good

Being totally alone after leaving the JWs - having been a "good" JW sister, I had NO non-JW friends

But since then, my life has picked up

86

"Congratulations" - WHY?

by Prisca in

jw
friends

why is it a social custom to say "congratulations" to a guy when his wife/gf has had/is having a baby?.

what has he done to deserve the sentiments?

all he's done is have an orgasm and spurt some semen into her?

Prisca

I would think it meant simply......."congradulations that your having a child"......

Yes, that is my point - what has he done to merit the congratulations?????

86

"Congratulations" - WHY?

by Prisca in

jw
friends

why is it a social custom to say "congratulations" to a guy when his wife/gf has had/is having a baby?.

what has he done to deserve the sentiments?

all he's done is have an orgasm and spurt some semen into her?

Prisca

So if it's because "he's gonna be a caring father" - shouldn't the congratulations and back-slapping occur after a period of time, once that a father has proved himself worthy of carrying that title?

It's easy to say you'll look after a cute little baby when it's all wrapped up in a tiny bundle in the hospital - it's another matter when things get tough, when the kid is playing up, when the kid becomes a trouble-filled teenager.

That's when being a father really comes into play.

86

"Congratulations" - WHY?

by Prisca in

jw
friends

why is it a social custom to say "congratulations" to a guy when his wife/gf has had/is having a baby?.

what has he done to deserve the sentiments?

all he's done is have an orgasm and spurt some semen into her?

Prisca

Why is it a social custom to say "congratulations" to a guy when his wife/gf has had/is having a baby?

What has he done to deserve the sentiments? All he's done is have an orgasm and spurt some semen into her? So what's so special about that?

Meanwhile it's the woman's body that is carrying and nurturing the baby. It's she who has to go through childbirth, a process that changes her body forever. If anyone deserves to be congratulated, it's her.

Don't take me wrong, I'm not male-bashing here (I love men) but just trying to make sense of this world we live in.

132

I have a hard time blaming the Watchtower

by spiritwalker in

jw
friends

" if the watchtower said it, and the men on the platform preached it, then it must have been true.

so it was very hard to accept as an adult, that they were wrong.

i blame myself.

Prisca

Excellent post, Spiritwalker.

Whilst things are not all black and white as they have been presented by you, by and large we have to accept some responsibility for the fact that we became JWs and lived that way of life for some period of time.

This board does foster a mentality of shifting blame for one's life onto others, yet personal growth and maturity does not start until we begin to accept responsibility for our own actions. We cannot continue to blame the Borg for ruined lives once we have been out of it for a while. It's not easy starting life in a world we were taught to hate, a world that we didn't expect to be around for very long, but it can be done. And how we live our lives in this world is dependant upon us, not others.

Accepting responsibility also means we can live much happier lives too. Continually trying to shift the blame onto others only encourages fostering of hate, anger and bitterness because we use it as a way of justifying the way our lives have turned out. But if we accept that some, if not all, of our problems are a result of our decisions, then we learn from our mistakes and get on with life.

Positivity not negativity is the only way to improve one's quality of life. Continuing to blame others for the consequences for our decisions is not only immature, but soul-destroying as well.

117

thank you all my defenders

by Mulan in

jw
friends

hi to all who defended me on that other board.. i came home today to nine pm's, all defending me from the personal attacks on me, on another board.

i am still in shock, but i do appreciate the words of those who defended me.. one gal called me and told me she had five phone calls from others expressing shock over the way i was being maligned on the other board.. i am fine, and dealing with it.

i guess we all need to expect to be criticized.

Prisca

Valis,

Your post here makes a nice change from the PMs I received from you yesterday.

Thanks for the apology, I hope we can put this behind us.

117

thank you all my defenders

by Mulan in

jw
friends

hi to all who defended me on that other board.. i came home today to nine pm's, all defending me from the personal attacks on me, on another board.

i am still in shock, but i do appreciate the words of those who defended me.. one gal called me and told me she had five phone calls from others expressing shock over the way i was being maligned on the other board.. i am fine, and dealing with it.

i guess we all need to expect to be criticized.

Prisca

OK Simon, thanks for at least confirming that Valis really did make those comments (who refuses to apologise but who cares).

Goodbye everyone.

117

thank you all my defenders

by Mulan in

jw
friends

hi to all who defended me on that other board.. i came home today to nine pm's, all defending me from the personal attacks on me, on another board.

i am still in shock, but i do appreciate the words of those who defended me.. one gal called me and told me she had five phone calls from others expressing shock over the way i was being maligned on the other board.. i am fine, and dealing with it.

i guess we all need to expect to be criticized.

Prisca

Sorry to butt in here, Simon, but Prisca, why on earth if this was so traumatic did you not quit the board? If I had someone uttering death threats to me when I thought that it was for real I would drop the board in a second!

As I said a couple of hours ago, I did leave. But I came back to help a friend who needed a friend, and so I stayed. As for Valis, I don't care where he posts. I've ignored all his posts here and elsewhere, simply because I've seen how low he will stoop. Maybe I should have ignored his abusive PMs as well *shrugs*

Shamus, I think you are totally over-reacting, talking about wanting to bring the board down. I've tried to make my peace with Simon privately, I've told him I only want peace on all sides. Maybe you shouldn't have made a big deal about it yourself, then this whole mess wouldn't have snowballed like it did.

117

thank you all my defenders

by Mulan in

jw
friends

hi to all who defended me on that other board.. i came home today to nine pm's, all defending me from the personal attacks on me, on another board.

i am still in shock, but i do appreciate the words of those who defended me.. one gal called me and told me she had five phone calls from others expressing shock over the way i was being maligned on the other board.. i am fine, and dealing with it.

i guess we all need to expect to be criticized.

Prisca

Prisca: nothing was done about it

Simon: How do you know? What where several moderators doing in chat at the time? TAKING CARE OF IT

Umm, weren't they in there becos of what was happening between Aztec and Xenawarrior/Valis? That was the major thing going on in the chat room at the time - Valis was constantly making verbal assults towards me, culminating in the death threats. When I said something in regards to what he had just said - you told me to "shut up"! Yeah, nice one, telling someone that had just been threatened to not say anything in reply to the threatener (Valis).

What do you want me to do? Go shoot Valis? Tell him he's a naughty boy and don't do it again? Delete him? C'mon, tell me your bright idea of what I should do and WHY

At the time, it would have been appreciated that you responded to my 2 PMs/emails, at least acknowledging my hurt and if anything had been done, then at least let me know. For all I knew, nothing did happen. You claim the moderators were looking after it. Well how was I to know? Look in my crystal ball Simon????

Your problem prisca is that you cannot just let things go and move on.

Same goes for everyone on this board then. We can't let go of some things, otherwise no one would be whinging about JW stuff all the time.

And your problem is that you refuse to acknowledge your part in not dealing with situations, which result in things snowballing, like they have now. After all, Valis is going to continue to deny he said anything simply because he can't remember making those threats. Since you didn't do anything then (that I know about anyway) then you can finish this argument by showing Valis where he made the threats and then he can apologise for what he said and then the matter will be finished.

117

thank you all my defenders

by Mulan in

jw
friends

hi to all who defended me on that other board.. i came home today to nine pm's, all defending me from the personal attacks on me, on another board.

i am still in shock, but i do appreciate the words of those who defended me.. one gal called me and told me she had five phone calls from others expressing shock over the way i was being maligned on the other board.. i am fine, and dealing with it.

i guess we all need to expect to be criticized.

Prisca

Yes it DID bother me, that's why I took a 2 week hiatis from ALL boards, to clear my mind.

Note that Simon is not denying that it took place (since he and Ang were in the chat room at the time), so I don't know why he can't send the chat transcript to Valis so Valis can see what he said.

It did happen, and nothing was done about it, except that I took time out to take care of myself.