Hi Cedars
I do sympathize with your family predicament. Unfortunately, I am sure your parents will never fully let you off the hook. Time will eventually create the great divide that breaks up families. Its a WT specialty. Personally I think the best advice is to come clean with a full admission of all your doubts, new discoveries and reasons for being unable to return to the life of a JW. We know that the facts speak for themselves. If your parents refuse to listen or even consider your present evaluation then so be it. There really is no way to escape this reality, no matter how painful this will be. The WTS does not provide an easy exit. A gradual fade will only cause people to talk behind your back, inventing all kinds of false reasoning for why you left. I think its best to put ALL your cards on the table now. I recall a conversation that I had with Ray Franz and he had to laugh at all the things that people said about him and what motivated him to leave. Ray had a very dry sense of humour and sometimes I wasn't quite sure when he was being funny.
Years later I was talking with an old annointed brother who began to tell me why Ray Franz had left "the truth". I informed him that I knew Ray personally and had spoken with him at length about these matters. I also informed him that I had purchased both his books and had read them thoroughly. That silenced him pretty quickly. To his credit he sat there and listened while I gave him the facts.
If you share everything with your family it might provoke a reaction in them. They will immediately realize that your present mindset will necessitate them cutting you off. That will be upsetting for them and maybe, just maybe, they might bend an ear to some of your new found discoveries. I wouldn't challenge faith issues. That will shut them down completely. I realize that your faith has been shattered by your new found knowledge. As you already know there are countless inconsistencies within WT teachings and piles of failed predictions. I would work with those. My stock question to any JW is this. How do you explain the one true end time prophet of God, having all their predictions fail? Not a single prediction came true! Is that the mark of God's end time prophet. To say this is blasphemy!
Anyway, I wish you strength in this tough predicament. I will remember you in my prayers. I have been in these shoes for quite some time now.
FWFranz