@Anna Marina "A friend was df'd for asking the elders about the child abuse issues and was disfelloshipped without even being told about it".
You just don't get disfellowshipped for asking elders about child abuse issues. I brought an issue that had happened years ago regarding an elder's alleged misconduct with a child to the attention of the elders, I even mentioned the ARC. The elder in question got taken off, and I definitely did not get disfellowshipped. And I'm an older woman, and not an elders wife either....