Still Thinking,
I have felt like you about God when I was falling away, but when I think about it, what other way is there?
What if he did save those Russian Christains but not starving Africans? He would be then accussed of being a racist God, or people would be flocking to become Chrisstians for the wrong reasons, like rice Christians.
Or how about he stops all suffering, runs around after the Devil cleaning up his mess so people can say, "the Devil was right you know, we can do what ever we like and look, nobodies suffering!"
When Jesus takes over, it is then that suffering ends.
As for your question of did I feel the Spirit more when in the stronger and more encouraging congregation?
To be honest, I felt it more when I was home on my own, especially if I had been out on the field service on my own which I often did of an evening after I finished work.
When I went to the new congregation, surely if it was an internal feeling I should have been hyped up that I gad sold my house, moved 200 miles, totally on my own yet at the mercy of God in order to as I fantisised, further carry out his will?, yet it was as if God no longer knew where I was, totally nothing.
One of the sisters of this new cong, when accompanying me to my old cong fro a visit, remarked that it felt as Spiritual as Bethel school in comparison, I really think something was going on up there that stopped the Holy Spirit and that it wasnt just me that noticed it.
Actually, I jjust remembered a time up there where I gid experience the Spirit quite strongly, I was waiting at the railway station, not praying or talking or even thinking about God, when I got off the train and got to my parked car, I found it had been broken into and my suit and quite a lot of my clothing had been stolen. That Spirit did comfort me, but no, you are right, it shouldnt really be like that that we have to constantly aproach a loving God to get any acknowledgement back from him, so I wonder if there is a reason we are unaware of?, maybe the Devil demands God not steal his "subjects", unless they go willingly of their own validition with no prompting from God at all?