Posts by WinstonSmith

17

Simon: help please

by Farkel in

my last two posts were not parsed with a cr/lf.

all the sentences ran together with no cr/lfs.

i'm still using chrome with xp-pro and until today, everything worked perfectly.

WinstonSmith

I have the same thingo as Transhuman68. When I click on my name in the top right of the screen. I get a 'page not found' message. Thanks for your hard work Simon, it is much appreciated :-)

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Well this morning I have 11 less friends on Facebook. I honestly expected more to be gone, but I am sure that it will dwindle away over the next few days. Not one of the 11 people that have unfriended me has said anything, no message, nothing, just a click to delete me from their lives.

Remember the friend that I talked about whose son was DF’d last year? Mrs Smith got a text message last night from her and her husband that said “We are thinking of you and you are in our prayers.” We both had a chuckle at this. I guess I they are not thinking of me, and I am not in their prayers. Glad to hear that they are so sad about me dying at Armageddon!

Mrs Smith got text message this morning from Sister T saying “Hello my sister, SO glad that you are still my sister! Our hearts are breaking so yours must be shattered. We are here for you and love you both. Let us know how we can help. I’ll be in touch as soon as I can.” Don’t you just love all the assumption? Mrs Smith replied and said “Thanks for your message. People already deleted him from Facebook without any words of confirmation which was a rude shock for me. As you know it was not an easy decision for Winston because he loves our brothers and sisters. We love you guys so much.”

It will be interesting to see how things pan out with Sister T. She has not responded yet to my email from yesterday.

I haven’t heard anything at all from the COBE or any of the other elders. They had their Service Meeting last night (I sent my message about halfway through) and our convention is not this weekend, but the one after so there won’t be another Service Meeting for two weeks. I’m guessing that they will announce it then. Might just have to phone in and listen to my coup de grace...

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Cheers Tornapart, I wrote it, rewrote it, started over, rewrote it, and then decided on this final version. Any and all are welcome to copy, paste, and plagaragise it if they think it is something they can use.

Well, within half an hour I have 5 less friends on Facebook. No reply, no comment, just deleted me out of their lives like an un-needed file. Their loss. I don't blame them, they are simply following their programming. I wonder how many will be gone by morning?

I have received one message via Facebook, and it was nice and positive. The guy said "Thanks for your message, I respect your decision. So many spend their time half in and half out which I think is worse. All the best for the rest of your life!" His name is still showing on my friends list. Such a nice comment, and more so when you consider that we were much closer to some of the people that have deleted us without comment.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Well, it is done. I just sent off my letter to the COBE, and sent it as a PM to all of my JW Facebook friends with some introductory comments.

Here is the letter:

27 August 2013

To the Body of Elders,

This letter is to advise you that I, <Winston Smith>, no longer consider myself to be a member of the religion “Jehovah’s Witnesses” and to request that you destroy any records that you hold on me.

This religion was assumed from an early age, however now as a mature adult I have compared the doctrines and policies of “Jehovah’s Witnesses” with the contents of the bible and can see a vast difference. My personal beliefs and the doctrines and policies of “Jehovah’s Witnesses” no longer align. For many decades now the Governing Body have claimed to represent Jesus, and in that position have either predicted dates for the end of the world, or dangled the thought of it being “soon” yet Jesus was very clear in his words at Luke 21:8:

“He said: “Look out that YOU are not misled; for many will come on the basis of my name, saying, ‘I am he,’ and, ‘The due time has approached.’ Do not go after them.” - NWT

I hope that our friendships will transcend the difference in our beliefs, however I know - despite there being no sound scriptural reasoning for it - the Governing Body requires that no contact be maintained, even on a social level. This is of course ironic given that the July 2009 Awake on page 29 states:

“No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family.”

It would appear that what is printed in the magazines, and the behind closed doors policy of the organisation differs markedly. This is but one of the many issues I have with the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society, along with its policies that allow the committing and cover up of sexual abuse against children.

<Mrs Smith> is a loving wife and amazing woman and as such she understands and supports my decision. I alone am disassociating.

I do not wish to be contacted with regards to the contents of this letter except for it to be confirmed by email that you have received the letter, and have destroyed my records.

We may no longer be sharers of the same faith, but as far as I am concerned we will always be friends.

Yours sincerely,

Winston Smith

<email address>

I sent it, and then we went out and got some ice cream.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Cheers Tornapart, I hope that some members, or lurkers can read it and take away some encouragement to never give up on getting themselves and / or their loved ones out.

:-)

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hey there Phizzy, great to hear from you! I agree completely that she is probably most worried about about losing me as a friend. I have reassured her that my view of her and relationship with her will not change as far as I am concerned and that the ball is in her court as to whether she wants to keep contact. We'll see.

I emailed her this afternoon and told her the news. She replied and said that she is not going to respond straight away, and that she really needs to think about how to respond to me. She said she feels like she has been hit by a sledgehammer.

I fired off a quick reply to reassure her that whatever her decision I would still be her friend. That's the honest truth. I'm at the point now where what will be will be.

BE WHO YOU ARE, AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL. THOSE WHO MIND DON'T MATTER, AND THOSE WHO MATTER DON'T MIND.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

So in my earlier post, I mentioned that we were planning to catch up with Sister T this past Saturday night to let her know that I was going to DA. Sister T has been very supportive over the last year, so we kinda felt we owed her to tell her ourselves rather than just let her hear an announcement out of the blue.

In the email exchange we had while we arranged dinner at a local restaurant, I pretty much wrote again what I had written in my email to mum. Remember the message didn’t say that we were DAing, but that there were some things that we were not okay with within the organisation.

Her response was “Please don’t disassociate, leave the door open” and she admitted (as she has in the past) that the organisation has its faults, as do the elders, but all we need to do is love Jehovah and be obedient to those taking the lead. On hearing that I thought that after hearing all of the things we have talked about over the last year or so, if this is still her line of thought, then perhaps I won’t get through to her. She is such a lovely person and has been on occasion treated like crap by the congregation, but for her there must be an organisation I guess.

I didn’t get a chance to reply so the next opportunity we had to catch up was Saturday night for dinner. I had no real plan as to how I was going to tell her, I thought I would just let the conversation flow and when it gets round to WTS stuff like it always does, I would bring it up.

That was not to be.

I have never seen her so high in my entire time knowing her. She was like the energizer bunny talking non-stop. We could not get a word in. I think her reaction was to cover over it and talk about other stuff in the hope that it would go away. We literally had no opportunity to say anything that we wanted. We went our separate ways at the end of the evening and Mrs Smith and I were like “Poor thing, she is so wound up she can’t bear to even think about it.” It was obvious that the way she was acting was way different to normal. At one point, even her daughter told her to calm down.

So that was my last chance to try and talk to her, but it turned out to be nothing.

I plan to send her an email this afternoon explaining and making it clear for her. I will be emailing my letter to the COBE this evening, and at the same time sending a PM containing the letter to all 215 of my JW friends on Facebook.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hello K99,

Yes indeed the WTS likes to add whatever the heck they like to the scriptures. The good thing about 1 John is that in verse 22 the writer goes on to explain exactly what he has been talking about. Anything additional to that are the additions of men.

Of course, mum is smart enough to play a cool game, and if I know her at all, she simply won't tell anyone that I am DA and never bring it up. "Our little secret."

Thank you for taking the time to read through and comment!

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

So where was I? Oh yes, Mum’s reply to my email to her telling her that Mrs Smith and I didn’t want to be JWs anymore. This was the moment where I would learn whether or not my dearly loved mum would ever speak to me again. As mentioned, she was away for a day trip so her reply was brief:

“Please don’t be anxious about it at all. Not upset with you at all. So relax, and I will email you when we are back.”

Words cannot communicate how I felt after getting that. I felt like another massive weight had been lifted. I care so much for mum and was so worried what her reaction would be, not because I don’t trust her, but because I know how strong the pull of the WTS is. I was so relieved.

Later on we got to have an online chat and we talked it over a bit more. Mum said a number of really cool things like “Do what you have to do, be true to yourselves” “A lot of it I agree with you” “I go along with a lot of what you said like the lack of support etc” “The sex abuse thing really bothered me.” “Hearing things from an elders perspective was interesting.”

She did want some clarification as she thought my previous email had made it sound like we were being disfellowshipped. I assured her that we were not being disfellowshipped but that at the time I sent that email we were considering if both of us should DA. I told her that we had decided that only I would so that Mrs Smith could keep in touch with a couple friends. I reminded her that nowadays the WTS directs that DA people are treated the same as DF people. She said that the OM book uses 1 John 2:19 to say prove that the treatment is to be the same. I replied and said yes, when you read that scripture isolated on its own in the middle of a paragraph that talks about DA and DF it can give that impression, but when you read the scripture in context, it says no such thing, but is rather talking about the anti-christ. She said she would “check that out” and suggested that I say something similar to the elders. I chuckled and said yeah, that’s a good way to get a one way ticket to a judicial committee!

I sent her a copy of the DA letter I have written and then we finished up with her saying that she loved us both, cared about us very much and always would. She was sorry we were so distressed but assured us that she loved us and was proud of us. She told us that the decision had to be right for us and no-one else.

A few days later (last Wednesday) she emailed and asked if we had sent the letter to the elders yet. I said that I hadn’t as we were hoping to catch up with Sister T and talk it over with her. We felt like she should hear it from us rather just hear an announcement out of the blue. Mum said that she was glad that we had made a decision and could be true to our own feelings. “Good on you. I also agree with a lot of what you say, but there are other things that make me stay, so be it. Regardless of how it affects me I am proud of you sticking up for your beliefs.” I assured her that nothing has changed in our relationship from my point of view, just some points of view.

She admitted that she had a few tears about it but I got the impression it was more to do with the physical distance between us and not being able to talk face to face. She said again that there is a lot she agrees with us on and that she would love to discuss. She sometimes gets upset with the rules and regulations and no encouragement. I said that I am always ready to talk, and that if she wanted to send me a list of questions then she was more than welcome to.

We have had a couple of on and off online chats since then, but all is well. I have so much respect and love for my mum. I cannot put in to words just how I feel. She is a special woman, and I just fricken love her so much.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

@Listener: I swear I'm not! I'm just writing it all up as I have time promise.

@Giordano: Always great to hear from you, and thanks for sharing some more of your story. The WTS has a terrible effect on famillies, and I hope to minimise this as much as possible, and escape with what I can.

@Pickler: We LOVE our new place. So conveniently located to so many things! The child abuse angle really hit a point with mum. People who have a heart can't honestly turn away from it and write it off.

@Oubliette: I will type up some more soon about how things went with mum. I don't really want to play by any JW rules, but writing a DA letter is the one and only thing I will do. Once I hit SEND, I am done with it. The rest of their rules can kiss my butt. The letter is more for me anyway. I need to have a mental line in the sand, and s ending a letter of DA, while it does mean following their BS rules, it will provide me with that line. It will also stop anyone spotting me in a crowd and coming to say "Awwww we miss you at the meetings!"