Posts by WinstonSmith

18

apropos of absolutely nothing

by Hortensia in

i occasionally go on self-improvement benders, as witness my attempt to eat healthy food this week.

that is going well, so i thought i'd check out where i am intellectually.

the guardian recently published a list of the 100 greatest novels of all time.

WinstonSmith

I'm reading 1Q84 at the moment and am utterly engrossed in it.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hello K99,

Thanks for your message, great to hear from you! Thanks for taking the time to send a message. I thought that I would reply here in the thread in the hope that some others may benefit from our conversation. One of my reasons for starting it was the hope that there might be some in a similar situation who can get some help and ideas from whatever gets posted in there.

Mrs Smith and I had a great time on holiday recently. We went to a country completely different to our own so it was great to soak up the culture, the food and the atmosphere. We are keen to go back in a few years and explore the other end of the country. Good times!

I am no longer serving as an elder. I stepped down around the middle of last year. It has certainly eased the pressure of fading, but having been such an obvious member of the congregation (WT Conductor, School Overseer) people notice when you are not around so we have had to be very careful.

The thing to remember is that there is no quick way out of this. I fully expect that we may never be 100% out as such. We are fortunate that we live in a different country than our families, so as far as the local fade goes, we can manage that - we can move, we can play sick, we can pretend. But when it comes to the family who might want to come over and stay, it is hard to hide so close up. I guess we are fortunate that we each have a small number of family members who are JWs, so there will only every be few occasions where we have to act the part (like when they come and stay, or if we go back home to see them).

Some days it would seem easier to just up and leave. To DA ourselves and be done with it. But the fact is that there are some people (not many) that we genuinely love and they would be absolutely destroyed if we were to DA ourselves or get DF'd. We don't feel that we could put them through that. This is how we feel now. Who knows, maybe eventually we may have different feelings and even the tiny bit of association we have with the JWs at that time might be more than we can stomach.

We don't have kids which does make things a bit easier. I have noted though from other posters that where there is one believer and one fader, the fader helps foster a questioning attitude in the young 'uns. Always get them to ask WHY and not accept the traditional JW response of "because Jehovah / the FDS / the WT said so". Encourage them to drill deeper, not just on WT stuff, but on everything. In addition to possibly helping them see the truth about the truth, they will develop logical questioning minds, and no harm ever came from that.

Little things like letting a spouse oversleep are good things to do. You know what? The results are telling. Uber JWs would never allow themselves to sleep in and therefore miss a meeting. It is little things that will chip away, not necessarily a dynamite blow. Keep looking for the positive.

Often COs will want to speak with bros who are seemingly 'weak'. If someone gets pulled aside by the CO, at least they are expecting it (as they have been purposely doing less) and can therefore have some thoughts in mind as to what they can say to him. Play on the stress and tiredness factor. "You know bro, I am finding that I need more time for my family." "Man I am just so tired all the time" be prepared for the usual 'encouragement to study more, get more active in the ministry etc etc. But just remember that he is only with the congregation for a week and the elders will only stay pumped for a few weeks after he goes before they go back to the rut. In this game you have to use human nature to your advantage. Know that humans revert to ruts easily. Know that people (especially window cleaners) get very uncomfortable when you start talking about stress and pressure and imply that there is more that you want to say but can't. Know that most elders don't have the time (or interest) in shepherding in the manner prescribed by the WTS. If they do any shepherding, in most cases it is sporadic and more likely a result of wanting to tick a box to say they done it rather than any real interest in you or your family. Phrases like "I really want to talk about it but can't, but don't worry we are all good, there is nothing to worry about" are your best friends.

It is also good to make them think that they have done you a favour. Often when elders speak to brothers about removing priveliges or postions, they are fully expecting people to beg them to reconsider. Take the bull by the horns. "You know what I have been thinking about that for a long time anyway." "This is such a relief, I will miss my duties but am looking forward to spending more time with my family". Giving people a different reaction to what they were expecting is a great way to shorten a conversation and take control of it.

We have to remember that we are playing a long game, and patience and a strong gut is what will get us through. It really is a battle of attrition and small wins. I really and honestly wish you well in extricating yourself from the organisation. Be prepared for a long haul though mate, we win in inches. I encourage you to read the story of the 47 Ronin. A story of patience and honour.

Me and everyone here are cheering for you and will assist in any way we can.

Stay strong and fight hard.

Keep in touch.

WS

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

@Ray Publisher: Glad to be here bro. Always love hearing updates from you! The reporting of time is one of the most obvious scams of the many that are perpetuated by the WTS. Yet it is one of the strongest weapons in their armoury. For those of us on the fade, 'wiggle room' is one of the strongest weapons in our armoury. Reporting just enough to keep the wolves from becoming suspicious is a key part of our strategy. Elders who wake up face a particularly sticky time, as having been a visible and obvious part of congregation life, fading away can be hard. People notice when you start not showing up...

@mrquik: Thanks for sharing your story. It is heartwarming to see more and more waking up as a result of many different circumstances. CoC is an excellent read, and I wish there was some way it could be read by people pre-baptism, just so they can make an informed choice.

How did you like the WT study this weekend? For more than a hundred years the WTS has been making claims and statements about the imminent end of this world. Time and again people have been whipped into a frenzy by the WTS over how close it is. People have been commended by the WTS for selling up their lives, and not seeking careers and education. Still the world goes on, just as it always has. This WT article makes it clear though that if you are a bit frustrated by all this waiting, your lack of patience is indicative of a lack of faith.

I'm sure there is a sign on the wall in the Writing Department that says "Never miss an opportunity to make the sheep feel guilty!"

Expectation postponed is making the heart sick - Proverbs 13:12a

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hello Happy@Last, firstly, welcome to the board, thanks for sharing your story. I read your intro on your thread with interest. I hope you are well and healthy, and things are going well for you and your family. I love your illustration of the hotel. The phrase 'whitewashed graves' also comes to mind.....

We got an email yesterday from our congregation secretary looking for reports. The email said 'We missed you at the last few meetings, hope things are okay. By the way, just wondering if you could let me know your field service hours for October?'

Hey jackass, we have been overseas for three weeks, good to know you have your finger on the pulse of the congregation!

I would love to reply and say 'Hey bro, I'll make a deal with you - You show me a scripture that says I have to report time, and in return I will.'

But alas we aren't quite at that point yet. I will however wait a few more days before giving him something. Let him stew.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hello everyone!

Hope you are well, and fighting the fine fight successfully :-)

We have been intercontinental for three weeks and have spent the last couple of days doing all the fun stuff like unpacking, washing etc etc.

Due to the country we were in, we had no idea that Hurricane Sandy hit New York. I trust all our friends from here who are there weathered it out and did not suffer too much loss or damage.

We are looking forward to catching up on what's been going on here on the board. In the meantime, I think you will enjoy reading the 'letter' below that my brother forwarded to me from a 'friend' regarding NY Bethel. I don't know how original it as it is the usual JW forward of a forwarded email, but that said, it sure sounds like exactly like how I would expect the Head Office to react - not to start cooking meals in its massive kitchens to help feed those that may be without food, not to open its doors to provide shelter for those who need it, not to use its fleet of trucks to assist the local government and police move around supplies and aid. No, no, no. Their frist priority? Making sure everyone was able to have a phone hook up to the Monday night WT study as they weren't able to attend in person.......

See if you can read it with a straight face, I couldn't:

Dear Friends :

Thank you very much for your e-mails and text messages asking how we are doing. We are doing fine and the Bethel Family in all three complexes are fine. There were no injuries and in Brooklyn they are dealing with a few issues due to the flooding.

We received an unprecedented display of loving kindness by the U.S. Branch Committee when they announced on Monday morning that the Bethel Family in Brooklyn did not have to come in to work on Tuesday due to the expected high winds, flooding, and flying debris. This is a first. However, it underscores the loving concern of our brothers. Later that day at lunch, the U.S. Branch Committee made another announcement advising those at Patterson and Wallkill that lived in the Patterson Inn and off-site housing could leave at 4:00 p.m. on Monday to avoid the storm. They also made provisions for the Bethelites to pick up food for the evening and for the next morning . Finally, they advised those at home that they would be tied in to the Monday night Watchtower Study t and Morning Worship on Tuesday by video to their televisions in the room. Again, this left all of us feeling the love and concern of the brothers for our welfare.

As far as the friends in our congregation, there are no injuries. A couple of the friends homes had trees fall on them and one family had to evacuate. The biggest problem they are facing is power outages due to falling trees. One brother said it looks like a “war zone” with all the fallen trees and limbs around our congregation territory. The elders and circuit overseers are cooperating with the Regional Building Committees and Disaster Relief Committees to assess damage and to provide help where needed. Thus far, none of the friends in our congregation have needed assistance, but some have moved in with others who had better conditions. The elders are working this morning to check on everyone and see what assistance they need. What a loving organization we are a part of that has in place arrangements to assist the friends. Many unbelieving husbands and other relatives have been impressed by the calls of the elders and offer to help where needed.

You have no doubt seen scenes of New York City with water gushing down the subway, into buildings, and flooding roadways. The picture of the crane dangling ominously from the top of a skyscraper near Central Park and 57 th Street will forever be an image of the devastation of this storm. Who could have ever imagined that Wall Street would be closed for two days and the subways closed for several days due to a late Hurricane in October. It will be several weeks before things are back to “normal.” However, in the midst of all the devastation, the brothers in Bethel are back to work and really the operations never came to a halt. Due to technology, many of the brothers who stayed home were able to work remotely from home and even took phone calls from their rooms as if they were still at work. Since Patterson and Wallkill were not affected as much by the storm, it was work as usual although our thoughts and prayers have been with our brothers on the East Coast.

For us, this is a prelude to what lies ahead during the great tribulation when we will all need to help one another. One thing we can be assured of, is that Jehovah is preparing us through his organization to be prepared and ready to assist each other. We are also reminded that we need to be prepared with our “go bags” since we never thought that we would need that emergency kit in New York. But, it just shows that no place is immune.

More importantly, this storm reminded us of the need to stay spiritual strong. It is only with trust in Jehovah that we will be able to know that he is our support and help in time of need. It reminds us of the words of Psalms 91:1, 2: “Anyone dwelling in the secret place of the Most High Will procure himself lodging under the very shadow of the Almighty One. I will say to Jehovah: “[You are] my refuge and my stronghold, My God, in whom I will trust.”

Thanks again for your prayers and concern for us and the friends on the East Coast. May Jehovah continue to bless and protect all of you.

39

My first own thread on here. Woken up and still in :(

by Gefangene in

jw
friends

i have been around in this forum a lot but haven't written much yet.. also i had a more or less rude awakening when i realized that the religion i grew up with, the religion i sacrificed a lot for and considered to be the 'truth' is nothing but mere bs.

it's quite a brick to digest.. my parents both are jws, elder and pioneer.

very good people but also very brainwashed.

WinstonSmith

Welcome! Thanks for posting, looking forward to hearing more of your story.

Winston

139

Witness Speak: the worst of collection

by grumblecakes in

jw
friends

so we all know the jw vocabulary is a weird one.

what words or phrases bugged you the most?.

a few of mine:.

WinstonSmith

"We missed you last night"

"Years later at a convention, there was a tap on my shoulder and...."

The word 'evidently' and the phrase 'it seems that' are used to hinge doctrine on, but are used later to show that it was a 'suggestion'.

When a bro on the platform addresses the congregation as 'friends'.

'True Christians'

'Lovers of truth'

UGH!

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Indeed Broken Promises, indeed.

As humans we are all flawed, and require the kindness of others to get by in this adventure called life. Those who choose to put themselves on a pedestal, should not be surprised when they receive close scrutiny. Especially so when that pedestal is accompanied by claims of divine direction and appointment.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

So Mrs Smith and I were just chatting over a cuppa tea and she told me about something she heard today.

She met up with a friend from a neighbouring congregation and had coffee. In the course of the conversation, the friend says 'Do you know Sister X?" Sister X was in our congregation and recently moved to the friends congregation. 'Yes' said Mr Smith, 'I know her, why?'

'Well' says the friend 'Recently I spent some time with Brother B and his wife (an elder in our congregation), and they said that they were glad she moved because she was a moaner and a troublemaker.'

Here is an elder, speaking to a publisher in another congregation about his personal opinion of a sister who has recently moved. A fine example of a loving shepherd dontcha reckon? Regardless of our personal feelings (this sister is a bit of a pain, but is the classic, unmarried in her late 40s waaah everyone hates me type) a kind elder should never talk to a publisher about another publisher like this. What a douche-bag.

Sure, some might say, there are some big mouth people out there in the world, so why do you judge this guy so harshly? Well yes, there are people like this in the world. I even work with a couple of people like that. I know some worldy people who are worse.

But there is one big difference.

None of those people claim to be appointed by Holy Spirit.

336

The New Diary of Winston Smith

by WinstonSmith in

we had to go off grid for a time, time and half a time as we thought we had been outed.

fortunately it was a false alarm, but it was a stressful time.

i asked for my original diary thread to be deleted in case there could be anything on there to identlfy mrs smith and i. i am always very careful when posting, and am sure there was nothing on there, but felt it best to have it removed in order to be as cautious as a dove.

WinstonSmith

Hi Joe, thanks for checking in, always good to hear from you mate!

It is indeed very uncomfortable to get talking with a householder who clearly knows his stuff, and to which you know you don't have the answers to their probing questions. Most will fall back into repeating some tripe from a WT ad nauseum, or the good old trick of "I will need to go and do some research and come back with an answer" and then never coming back!

We used to live in a territory with a heavy Mormon population. I always found a lot of them pretty good to talk to. I have a real good workmate who is a Mormon. I'm not personally aware of targeted field service based on the threat of poachers, but I would love to see a face off between JWs and Mormons on the street. How would it go down? I envisage something like that scene in Anchorman where the guys from the rival channels get into a rumble.

"Did you have a trident?"

"I think I killed a guy"

"Yeah man, I think you're gonna need to lay low for a while"

:-D