Posts by Saethydd

24

Forgiveness

by Freedom rocks in

if someone does the same things over and over again and says sorry and then does it again and you point out that their apologies don't mean anything anymore, then they accuse you of not being forgiving enough, who is in the wrong?

(i mean as in constantly over a long period of time).

im trying to work out whether it was just part of the persons mental/ emotional manipulation tactics or whether i have the wrong view and i'm not forgiving enough.

Saethydd

That’s not a healthy dynamic and you’re under no obligation to maintain a relationship that is causing you constant grief. Their is a difference between being forgiving and allowing someone to take advantage of your kindness. I would be especially wary of someone who believes their apology is all that is required to make things right and attempt to use guilt to manipulate you if you don’t comply. Manipulative people make poor friends.

25

Am I being unreasonable with my pimo boyfriend?

by Addison0998 in

i was very lucky to have be dating somebody who didn’t run and snitch on me when i started having questions and showing him research i did, instead he listened to me, and after a few arguements, he did wake up as well.

it really didn’t take much to wake him up, and he was more just tired of the crazy witnesses in general.

and now we are planning on getting married and fading together so that our families can at least enjoy our wedding, that special time in life, before we possibly loose them one day.

Saethydd

My advice would be to leave the org behind as soon as you are able to live independently from your parents and not try to create the facade of believing.

If you can’t be honest with your family what kind of a relationship will you really have with them anyway? Even if they think you’re just inactive they will constantly bug you about “coming back to Jehovah,” and down the line if you have kids they are going to do their damndest to indoctrinate your children. Also in my opinion if your boyfriend can’t do his own research and come to his own conclusions then there is no guarantee he won’t be swayed back into the religion be some elder spinning a logical fallacy that your boyfriend isn’t trained to look for. I’m not gonna lie, it’s not an easy path and you’re going to miss your family at times, but I don’t believe you’ll never be happy if you have to hide your authentic self from people close to you.

40

Why are JDubs scared to death of apostate websites?

by Sour Grapes in

when i was an elder back in the 1970's i loved to debate and challenge ministers, preachers, and holy rollers.

now you can be a loyal jdub fully indoctrinated for 30 years but just take a peek at an apostate website and you are doomed.

yes, satan now has you by the gonads and all of the years of being at the meetings, all of the family worship nights, all of the conventions, and all of the personal study just go up in a cloud of smoke.

Saethydd

Because apostates are "mentally diseased" and JWs are afraid it's contagious. The Governing Body told them, so it must be true.

36

Go Bags, Safe houses and cartoon of two kids.

by scruffmcbuff in

i have been out a good 10+ years and until recently didnt pay much attention to what the jehovahs are up to.. why have they taken this turn with the bunker videos and making all the brainwashed people like my parents pack a go bag.

now let me just clarify.

im a military man i believe everyone should have an element of preparedness canned goods,bottled water and a bug out bag is a great addition ( ill stop waffling on about that now).. but what concerns me is the fact they are advising elderly people to bug out.

Saethydd

The little cartoon kids are Caleb and Sophia. Watchtower's latest tool for indoctrinating young children. Back when I still lived with my parents my mother would have my 3-year-old cousin watch practically all of the twenty videos every time she watched him. I feel so sorry for the generations of JW kids who are going to be force fed this crap now.

20

Views on the golden ratio??

by Freedom rocks in

what are your views on the golden ratio or fibonacci sequence?

i know jws and some other groups use this as proof of gods existence.

i'm still looking into the debate but was wondering what others thought.

Saethydd

I would say that the argument works just as well for evolution and natural selection and certainly doesn’t serve as evidence against.

Take the sunflower for example, it makes evolutionary sense that the most effecient way to store seeds in the same amount of space would be seen there because that particular formation would have more seeds than any other and would therefore have more “offspring” and thus over time it would become the dominant form of its species.

As for the fact that this sort of thing follows a mathematical pattern, I don’t see how that proves a creator without invoking the logical fallacy that a creator must exist to make the patterns. The patterns in and of themselves don’t prove anything about their origins.

The argument for intelligent design insists that there is an obvious difference between something occuring by chance and something designed and that everything around us was “obviously designed.” However, how can one claim to be able to recognize the difference between design and chance if one presupposes that everything was designed? If you don’t know what something existing by chance looks like then how can you definitively say that what exists around us isn’t just that? You can’t. All you can do in engage in a confirmation bias that looks at the good things and calls it design, while simultaneously dismissing all the things that make no logical sense from a designer’s standpoint.

Evolution and natural selection however provide logical explanations for both extremely efficient mechanisms and crazy bullshit that makes no logical sense, and both of those things exist in nature in vast quantities whether creationists are willing to admit it or not.

8

Growing Up Strange (even for a JW)

by GizmoSnicket in

i've been meaning to join an online ex-jw community for quite some time, and finally have made the effort to do so.

i was raised in a small/mid size city in the northeast united states.

i am currently 27 years old, just about five years fully out of the organization (after about two years of "fading" away).

Saethydd

I was also baptized before I was anywhere close to mature (10 years old) and even though both my parents where in the truth things could be a little inconsistent. I feel like me and my sister got the short end of the stick as opposed to our older siblings. They both went to a public high school and got to watch what would be considered bad by some Witnesses (Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, etc.) But after they both graduated and got married it’s like my mother wanted to turn the dial up on our “spirituality.” (Though with limited success) Me and my sister started homeschooling when I was in sixth grade so that me, her, and my mother could regular pioneer. (never got more than thirty hours and got asked by the elders to withdraw six months in) I didn’t mind homeschooling at the time because I didn’t have many friends anyway, though it definitely caused me difficulties when I started college. After my oldest siblings moved out my parents also tried to have a weekly family study, (which we never had when my older siblings lived there) which was incredibly boring and fortunately only worked out once every month or two.

I’m very glad I found a non-religious girl who is very happy being that way. I would hate to ever put my children in a position like the ones you or I were put in growing up.

18

My Reflections On a Year of Freedom

by Saethydd in

in late may 2017, i told my parents how i really felt about the religion they had raised me in, and by early june i was out of their house.

i've done a lot since then.

i let my hair and beard grow out a bit.

Saethydd

I also recently updated my profile picture, which was taken by my girlfriend when we graduated together earlier this year. She and those on this forum are among the major influences that helped me once I left the cult behind.

18

My Reflections On a Year of Freedom

by Saethydd in

in late may 2017, i told my parents how i really felt about the religion they had raised me in, and by early june i was out of their house.

i've done a lot since then.

i let my hair and beard grow out a bit.

Saethydd

In late May 2017, I told my parents how I really felt about the religion they had raised me in, and by early June I was out of their house. I've done a lot since then. I let my hair and beard grow out a bit. I've engaged in entertainment that is considered to be "inappropriate for a Witness." (Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, and Mr. Robot are all fantastic TV shows) I've attended fan conventions and other events I never would have as a Witness. I've celebrated my birthday and a number of other major holidays. I've started working to improve the world instead of just waiting for some god to come along and fix all of my problems for me. I graduated with a technical degree in computer science and am set to pursue a Bachelor's in Electrical Engineering this fall. I participated in an internship for Physics/Math majors at a prestigious university. I've helped another person make the decision to leave the Watchtower behind. I reconnected with some of my cousins who were considered "bad association" and am so happy to have them back in my life. I fell in love with a girl and we moved into our own place together a few weeks ago. Her family has practically adopted me and are always happy to see me at their family gatherings.

I am happy. For a year I have lived as my true self without worrying about whether this is something "a Witness is supposed to do."

Yes, I miss my family, and yes I miss my old friends, but I am still so much happier having made the decision to unapologetically be my authentic self instead of trying to mask my true identity to hang on to those relationships because I've realized something. If I had lied about who I was for this past year then I still wouldn't have those relationships, rather, some fictional version of myself, some facade I had invented would have the relationships with "my" supposed friends. My true self would be so far removed from what they saw that if they ever saw the real me I would be a stranger to them, much as I am now I suppose.

To anyone who is contemplating staying in the religion to maintain an image and keep your friends, I ask you to please consider this: If you cannot be honest with someone about who are and what you want, are they really your friend anyway?

45

Why Did JWs Abandon Brooklyn for the Sticks?

by Room 215 in

i may have missed this, but can anyone tell me what was the pretext the gb concocted to justify their abandonment of a perfectly suitable, high-profile, high-visibility complex in what is arguably the world's greatest metropolis for the bucolic isolation of upstate new york.

any how does the move square with their purported belief in the imminence of armageddon?

.

Saethydd

I recall several JW's discussing how "wise" it was to get out of a big city like New York before the "great tribulation."

7

Akward moment.

by poopie in

jw
friends

have a buddy that's disgellowshi and an uber driver and he is shunned like crazy.

recently he picked up jw that was forced to say hello and greet him akward..

Saethydd

Ah, the awkwardness of JW’s having to interact with disfellowshipped people can be quite funny. I remember some months back when I was volunteering to help run the sign in table for a community event that encourages reading and a few JW’s showed up, and I could just feel the discomfort.