To recap: My sister left her family for about 2 weeks, she had been depressed for months (years possibly) and information also surfaced about her being molested by our older half-brother (my fathers son) when she was little. My family tried desparately to get her to come back and get therapy and it worked.
Right now my sister is staying with my parents and they are helping her (and her husband and kids) get back on their feet. It was not so good for the two boys at first and they felt abandoned, but she is back now and they are doing so much better. She is also seeking professional help. Her and her husband decided to not divorce but move foward slowly (going on dates, etc.) My parents helped the husband and fixed up their house a bit, helped with bills, etc. My sister on her two weeks "vacation" spent it with a guy she had been seeing on the internet from England who came over...was crazy, suicidal, she asked him to go back home and he did. She also spent a great deal of money on clothes and furnature using the credit cards...A sign of severe low self esteem if you ask me.
I had talked to the husband, my brother-in-law a lot of the phone through this whole thing and realized that a lot of the things my sister said to him were just grossly exaggerated. I have a new-found respect for him. He went through a lot and he is a really loving father and husband. I do not blame my sister, as she was so depressed and she had a really distorded view of her life, she did not want to be a wife and mother anymore. If they had a fight--she looked at it as him picking on her, etc...and thats how I initially was on her side. I tied to be supportive no matter what, I knew that she was telling me things that she did not feel comfortable telling the rest of the family, so I was really her only help in coping.
The more I was around her, the more I knew there was an issue and that she is mentally unwell. Her self esteem is horrid and just felt that she was not only fat and ugly, but undeserving of a good life, a bad wife and mother, etc. She was not herself by any means.
My family has gotten closer together and I have even recieved good encouraging emails from my other sister who was normally the front-runner in the shun-game but she has since changed her attitude about me. I have had great conversations on the phone with my father and mother and they have said without provocation that they all intent to come to my wedding even though it is on an assembly day (oops..). They have gotten closer to Mike and really saw us as an asset in helping my sister (and my brother too...he had some issues but not so bad). My family had said really nice things about Mike and given our relationship a lot of validity.
A couple nights ago, my sister and brother-in-law invited us our to dinner so we went. Mike and my BIL and I had great conversation. I unfortunately felt some bad feelings/vibes coming from my sister who seemed to be picking on her husband, rather short with him, etc...it just did not seem right. Her husband was obviously trying REALLY hard (almost too hard) to make her happy and make sure she was having fun. We felt bad for him because it was obvious he was doing all the right things but it was just not enough for her. I hope that with the continued dates they go on and cousuling, she can work things out.
She had her judicial commitee and will be "publicly reproved". I am not sure what that is all about because I have never seen that done! (Or have I?). My brother was privately reproved recently (girl issues...oops) but for public...they announce it...does that mean people will not talk to her? Even so I do not think it will be so detrimental to her as she is glad she is not DF'd and it seems all her close friends and family are rooting for her and thats all she needs.
My oldest sister wants us three girls to have a lunch together to discuss the molestation and our feelings and how we can move on from there. As far as I know it has only happened to my sister, but perhaps my oldest sister is starting to remember things? To behonest, I have suspected something like this happening to my sister. Odd.
In any event, things have improved dramatically on the home front.
Posts by jwbot
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6an update on my sister
by jwbot into recap: my sister left her family for about 2 weeks, she had been depressed for months (years possibly) and information also surfaced about her being molested by our older half-brother (my fathers son) when she was little.
my family tried desparately to get her to come back and get therapy and it worked.
right now my sister is staying with my parents and they are helping her (and her husband and kids) get back on their feet.
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jwbot
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24
Pet Lovers..Show off your "pets"
by JH in.
here are a few pictures of my cats, the one i have now (top picture) and the one i had before.
they look alike.
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jwbot
Thats my baby, at 2 months and at 1 year old. Isn't she lovely? -
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WHY DO PRISONERS DISCOVER "RELIGION"?
by Mary inwhy is it that a number of people who commit the most henious of crimes, suddenly become "born again christians"--usually while sitting on death row?
do they think this somehow absolves them of what they did?
i remember when karla fay tucker was interviewed shortly before her execution (in texas) a few years ago.
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jwbot
Boredom, desparation, emptiness and a reason to exist. Why else would anyone prisoner or not find religion?
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17
So my neighbor said the awesomest thing to JWs..
by jwbot inok my landlords daughter and her husband max live above us.
they are a really great family, very nice and cool.
anyway once in a while we have a good conversation with each other and a while ago i had told max about my family situation and a little counter-witnessing.
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jwbot
Scully, that is about how it is with my friends. They know my background, they know what it put me through and they know that its just not right. I would like to hear what some of my more outspoken friends would say if they got their door knocked on.
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3 babies contract Herpes becaue of a religious ritual
by pratt1 in.
i heard a very sad news item this morning on the way to work.. in upstate new york, a rabbi has been ordered to stop performing bris, using his mouth to suction the blood after 3 boys tested postive for herpes after receiving a bris from the same rabbi.. 2 of the boys a very sick and one has died.
apparently herpes can be deadly on the new ammune system of babies.. does anyone know anthing about this religious ritual - why would a rabbi use his mouth to suction blood from the baby?
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jwbot
This is sick...and circumcision is another thing I do not agree with. Mutilating a baby for the sake of religion or tradition (its not for health reasons anymore) is disgusting.
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So my neighbor said the awesomest thing to JWs..
by jwbot inok my landlords daughter and her husband max live above us.
they are a really great family, very nice and cool.
anyway once in a while we have a good conversation with each other and a while ago i had told max about my family situation and a little counter-witnessing.
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jwbot
confusedjw: Not that I approve of underage drinking...I just do not think every other college student should be stopped whether they are walking or driving (or going through the dorms) to see if they are drinking. Cops even set up road blocks here to find them... They should be chasing the people who steal from cars...or slash tires, or RAPE. Most college students here are really great about not even getting close to a vehicle if they have been drinking, we are all very safe. Hell tonight a bunch of us will get cabs (paid for by Mike and I) and have a good night worry-free, but going near campus runs us the risk of getting harrassed...
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Lawyer Is Guilty of Aiding Terror (Women, When Are We Going to Wake Up??)
by kitties_and_horses_oh_my! inhttp://www.nytimes.com/2005/02/11/nyregion/11stewart.html?8br
lynne f. stewart, an outspoken lawyer known for representing a long list of unpopular defendants, was convicted yesterday by a federal jury in manhattan of aiding islamic terrorism by smuggling messages out of jail from a terrorist client.
in a startlingly sweeping verdict, ms. stewart was convicted on all five counts of providing material aid to terrorism and of lying to the government when she pledged to obey federal rules that barred her client, sheik omar abdel rahman, from communicating with his followers.
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jwbot
Don't make this a womans issue. She is a lawyer who did what she could and broke the law and putting the national security of this country in jeapardy for her client (and ultimately, money).
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So my neighbor said the awesomest thing to JWs..
by jwbot inok my landlords daughter and her husband max live above us.
they are a really great family, very nice and cool.
anyway once in a while we have a good conversation with each other and a while ago i had told max about my family situation and a little counter-witnessing.
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jwbot
Tuesday: In my area, the cops are real bored. They chase around innocent college students and try to bust them for underage drinking even if they are in no way harming anyone. At a college party...they threw pepper spray into the place! I would not wish the cops around here on anyone, even JWs.
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Gay Penguins
by ValiantBoy ingerman zoo tempts gay penguins to go straight.
a german zoo has imported four female penguins from sweden in an effort to tempt its gay penguins to go straight.
the four swedish females were dispatched to the bremerhaven zoo in bremen after it was found that three of the zoo?s five penguin pairs were homosexual.
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jwbot
Hehe awww....why can't they just accept the penguins? :)
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3 babies contract Herpes becaue of a religious ritual
by pratt1 in.
i heard a very sad news item this morning on the way to work.. in upstate new york, a rabbi has been ordered to stop performing bris, using his mouth to suction the blood after 3 boys tested postive for herpes after receiving a bris from the same rabbi.. 2 of the boys a very sick and one has died.
apparently herpes can be deadly on the new ammune system of babies.. does anyone know anthing about this religious ritual - why would a rabbi use his mouth to suction blood from the baby?
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jwbot
I asked a Jewish friend about this and he said that he has never heard of this type of ritual, so it is by no means mainstream, probably a crazy sect that just happens to be a jewish one.