Posts by RevMalk

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

I have said and will continue to say that Simon has every right to run this forum in whatever way he sees fit, and in that he does a better job than anyone I know. My comments weren't directed at Simon, per se, only to the fact that Amazing, as Amazing said, was wrong in the way he went about things.

Excellent, this is exactly how I feel, and it seems as though Simon thinks I'm trying to tell him what to do, and that is NOT the case, and I certainly meant no offence to anyone for comments that I've made. Simon has done a wonderful job here at JWD under the circumstances, and it's no easy task. So for Simon, or anyone that thinks I was trying to be mean, or be abrasive, or insulting, or whatever, just know that is not the case.

15

Online Therapy for Watchtower Survivors

by RevMalk in

i'd like to announce that a credited therapist has agreed to assist us in our healing process.

dr franklin is an expert of many types of therapy, including post traumatic stress disorder, which many of us seem to be suffering.

dr franklin has agreed to provide us with his expert advice as both a free question and answer form, and also through online and offline therapy, as well as therapy utilizing the use of the telephone.

RevMalk

I'd like to announce that a credited Therapist has agreed to assist us in our healing process. Dr Franklin is an expert of many types of therapy, including Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which many of us seem to be suffering. Dr Franklin has agreed to provide us with his expert advice as both a Free Question and Answer form, and also through online and offline therapy, as well as therapy utilizing the use of the telephone. He has been very generous in providing these resources, and I encourage everyone to take a look at what he has to offer, for those of us in need. His services are not limited to the molestation issues, but rather all issues pertaining to abuses we've endured as both JWs and exJWs. Here is a brief portion taken from his online biography, which can be found by clicking here.

David spent several years in the USAF, working as a clinical social worker, where he excelled in a variety of treatment settings. Specifically, he was a clinical provider and treatment team leader on an inpatient psychiatric unit. He also gained valuable experience working as a clinical provider on the Air Force's largest inpatient alcohol rehabilitation center. In addition, Dr. Dave has been the Director of a Family Advocacy Program (which is a military program designed to treat and stop child and spousal neglect and abuse). David has also worked with families who have a disabled family member, as an outpatient mental health clinician, as a hostage negotiator consultant, as the program manager for a city wide suicide prevention program, as an outpatient substance abuse diagnostic evaluator, and he worked as a clinical adviser for an outpatient smoking cessation program. Dr. Dave is certified in Critical Incident Stress Debriefing (CISD). The following are considered his specialties...

edited to change title, I felt this was more appropriate since this is not just a Lambs issue.

Edited by - RevMalk on 29 January 2003 15:43:36

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

Post your families home address and telephone number

I do have to agree though, that this was wrong.

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

You know what RF? I've had that abuse from TH as well, and I don't agree with it. I'm not defending that way about him, and I don't appreciate the insinuations either. I also never said he should be allowed to do what he wants because he's an Abuse Survivor.

Whatever, you know what, if this happened to you I'd be sticking up for you too, it's because I care about people, and perhaps I take too much abuse. I never said TH was right and you guys were wrong, I was just stating my opinion on this particular situation. Forget I said anything.

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

Simon,

I know what you're saying, and I didn't say that you were doing wrong. It's your forum, and you need to do what you need to do to keep house. I'm also not saying that you should put up with the filthy registered names, but I would like to point out that they were used after he was banned, so I guess he had nothing to lose by then. Had someone done that over at LRD before they were banned, it would be different, but that was an obvious outburst based on feeling "wronged".

I gave this some thought, and If I were in a verbal argument with someone, and wasn't allowed to defend myself, or voice my opinions......if my mouth was taped shut, which can be likened to being banned from here. I'd probably lose it.....I'd go through the roof out of frustration, and I think that's what happened here.

would I allow him back to LambsRoar after all that? Yes, I believe I would, but maybe we have to keep in mind that LambsRoar is a little different than this site. We're there for healing, support and understanding one another, and we recognize that these things can and will happen. TH has been edited on LRD for using the "F" word, and I've asked him to tone down certain things, and it's worked wonderfully for us. Maybe it's all in my delivery, I don't know. I'm a very forgiving person, and I know you are too, but it is apparent that certain ones are allowed more slack here. I mean no offense, it's simply just fact. And I'm not jumping up and down, nor condemning you, just pointing out the obvious.

Not to bring up dead issues, but you know what I went through last month, and am still going through, with someone we both know. As much as I've been hurt and defamed by this person, if he needed the shirt off my back, I'd give it to him. That's just the way I am, and I am merely giving my opinions based on how I would react to certain things, but I'm not trying to push my morals on anyone else.

Again, you need to do what you need to do, and I won't condemn you for it, I simply and respectfully disagree in this situation. But that doesn't mean I'm always right, and it doesn't mean you're wrong, it's just my opinion, and I think that's what JWD is all about.

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

Neither is swearing!

ditto

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

Do the search again, Rev, how many recently posted F words do you see? Not many, I can guarantee you that.
Englishman.

That may be true E-man, I must admit I didn't look at the dates, BUT, there's a simple solution to the big old mean "F" word. Ban the word.....it's that simple....LambsRoar doesn't allow the word either, but I censored the word out globally, it makes it much easier to handle.

Also, I do recall a time when you asked me to remove the word from one of my posts. I was quoting someone else. I did remove it, as you asked, and you thanked me, and asked where I quoted it from, so you could take care of it. I told you where it was, and it remains here to this day. I must admit, I don't know what you meant by 'taking care of it', but since it wasn't removed, I can only assume it didn't mean removing it. My post was censored, but even though I was only quoting someone else, theirs wasn't. I certainly won't speculate publicly, as we can see where that gets us, but I have my ideas as to why it wasn't removed from the original post.

Also, the fact that Amazing is able to still post on this subject, and has locked TH out from his email, I don't see where any of this is fair. The guy can't even defend himself, yet we're still here to talk about him. It's giving Amazing, and everyone else the chance for the last word, and I don't think it's playing fair.

I would also request that TH's personal information be removed from Amazing's post. As I noted earlier, I believe this is a clear violation of the rules, but maybe I'm assuming again.

I'm not here to take sides, and I'm not here to tell anyone they're wrong, or right. I'm just pointing out the obvious and stating my opinions. I'm speculating here again, but it seems as though this was an easy way to ban the guy that rubs us the wrong way. We need opposing ideas and views here, and banning TH appears as though we're trying to control the thinking process around here.

Why not at least put it to a public vote? That's about as diplomatic as you can get. This site might belong to Simon, but IMHO we should all have a say in certain things, as this board is an influence in the lives of all of us.

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

He was deactivated for good reason and I would remind you that it was not the first time he has been abusive to other forum members or to me. His conduct before and since does not tally at all with your description and he will not be coming back on here, now or ever.

I know it's not the first time you've had to say something to TH. I wasn't trying to imply that you weren't doing what you thought was right. I was merely giving my opinion on it. I know you've been patient. I disagree with the description I gave though. That description of TH is that he has a big heart, and he cares, and that's all true. I won't argue all this, don't worry, I've given my 2 cents worth on it. You know for a fact I don't agree with the personal attacks, or name calling. We went back and forth on this once before when it was happening to me. Of course I was told I was wrong, so I assumed those rules went for everyone.

edited to add: I did a search on the "F" word. There are at least 95 topics that contain the word. This is one of his 'offences', yet I see it constantly with no repercussions to others. Here are at least 95 people who have not been banned from the site. And you can't argue that he was being abusive to others in this instance, he was defending his name, and when accusations are made, all bets are off, you should have the right to defend yourself, no matter who you are.

PS - sorry about the signature. I thought it was ok since others do it, and you link to LR anyway.

Edited by - RevMalk on 28 January 2003 13:7:10

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

AS the Granny on board.I am going to ask you all to stop all this. JWs reading this is having a ball.I know I keep bringing up my dead children & No I dont want your sympathy- But life is so short. Why not try to get along- I keep seeing the face & voices of those still in the "lie" saying HA! ha! they fight among themselves.....TH & Amaxing ( Jim you know I have met you & love you-Th I have not had the privledge -my loss) But please shake & make up. Oh the gift that God had give us to see ourselves as others see us- Dont let those still in bondage see that we are not truly free- put all anger aside. Otherwise I can see no other alternative -but to send you to your rooms....lol

I agree 100%, the problem is, TH, an Abuse Survivor, has been kicked off the board, and he was the one wronged.....so ya, we can all go about our business, but he got screwed. Not saying that he was completely innocent, just saying that we'll all screw up from time to time, and if we can't forgive and forget, then YES, the dubs can laugh their butts off at us. Even they can forgive and forget, but out here it's not possible? Come on, give me a break guys, we're all human. He is an abrasive guy, but he's done nothing malicious. We're talking about kicking a guy out because we don't like his personality, that's WRONG.

I find it really hard to swallow that TH would have an easier time being accepted back at the Kingdom Hall, than being accepted back here. I have a real problem with that.

Edited by - Simon on 28 January 2003 12:10:13

60

Clarification & Apology

by Amazing in

jw
friends

first a clarification, then my apology, and last comment regarding th:

mr. eakins (aka trauma_hound) has stated a number of times that he wishes i would take matters off-board to settle in private email as he has done with others.

my comment about you being a wuss could, would, and should have been taken in a better context by you.

RevMalk

I think this was a baiting. I think TH emailing in private was the correct thing to do. Isn't that what we always say here? Don't start garbage in public, do it in private. Then when a guy does so, it comes out here anyway, each and every time. And then Amazing's post that caused all this was so vague, it simply insinuated TH did some kind of horrible thing, that left way too much to the imagination. Now we see the email, and by the way, posting his full name and email address was wrong as well, and against the rules if I remember correctly. The email doesn't seem so bad to me. Yes, it was abrasive, yes TH is abrasive. We've had it out ourselves (TH and I), but I am understanding to the way he is.

There are many others that are the same way, like Farkel for one - no offense, just pointing out different personalities, and I DO NOT have a problem with Farkel, but the two of them could be twins. Farkel is allowed to get away with it, TH is not. Why?

Give me a break people, TH did nothing wrong here, and he should be allowed back in, NOW. Yes, after he was booted, he really went crazy, out of hurt and pain. But he DOES have a good heart, and he IS a positive influence here, whether it appears that way on the surface or not. He's done alot for the community, he's done alot for the Sexual Abuse issues, he's done alot all around, and he's gravely misunderstood. His email to Amazing was not bad at all, he did what he was suppose to do, take the mess in private, and he gets ostracized anyway. That in itself is a crime, and it's not a good example of how things are suppose to work around here.

I think Amazing was 100% in the wrong here, by bringing this into the public eye for one, and then posting TH's real name and email address. No offense to Amazing, sometimes people screw up, and I commend him for admitting his mistakes. I think TH was wronged here, I'm sorry, I just do. Like I said, TH and I have gotten into it, but we didn't go crying to the public about being hurt by each other, we handled these things like adults and went on with life.

I think some people need to grow up around here and handle things on their own without the whining and crying.

TH has been through alot, some of which was explained in the email to Amazing. Does that mean we have to cut TH some slack because he's been through so much? No, we need to cut each other some slack because we've all been through so much. There's not enough of that going around here. I thought we were here to help each other, not push each other away.

Edited by - Simon on 28 January 2003 12:10:37