Posts by Solzhenitsyn

22

Any Dogs Returning to their Vomit Here?

by Solzhenitsyn in

i was wondering if any long time jw's that are now pomo's here on the forum now act in a leadership role within another religious organization?.

i do and would enjoy a bit of conversation with this (i assume minority) "sub-culture" of ex-jw's.

.

Solzhenitsyn

Agreed on the religious framework. It just seemed like the path of least resistance for well coordinated community efforts with the added bonus of non judgmental and what we have found...non Jesus freak association. Dammit, its just a bad habit to follow others direction.

Contrary to my JW upbringing, the vast majority of everyone we have met in "Christendom" are really good people. Between youth group and athletics, all my kids have been happier and grown up more than we have ever experienced with them. And I simply have lost count of how many others within our 'church' that have come out of dogmatic, box checking, high control groups.

I thought JW's were the MOST f#$%ed up until I had new friends around our dinner table that came out of:

http://www.remnantfellowship.org/Our-Leaders/Gwen-Shamblin

https://brotherhoodofthewhitetemple.com/

http://www.theway.org/index.php?page=home&lang=en

22

Any Dogs Returning to their Vomit Here?

by Solzhenitsyn in

i was wondering if any long time jw's that are now pomo's here on the forum now act in a leadership role within another religious organization?.

i do and would enjoy a bit of conversation with this (i assume minority) "sub-culture" of ex-jw's.

.

Solzhenitsyn

Sorry about that. I wasn't inferring any of us are dog like. I should have put my title "in quotes" as JW's would say any ex-JW now having a share in anything religious of a non-JW nature would be like "Dogs Returning to their Vomit".

I'm wondering if having a share in another denomination after decades as a JW is just a subconscious 'stepping stone' for me and family out of all things religious.

I agree with you Giordano. Everytime the word trinity, cross, divinity, heaven, grace, ect comes up I shudder a bit and/or my wife squeezes my hand feeling the same shudder. So yeah, the support system. Over 100 collective years in my immediate family of social/support friends and family...then poof! I'm thinking the #1 reason is our need for unconditional friends vs. my family with all our A type personalities trying to live on an island.

And to clarify = Leadership. Leadership now in a non-denominational church is nothing like narcissistic JW leadership. For us it has presented as more of a community outreach, mostly my family helping the elderly (transportation to medical appointments, meals) and at a few local pregnancy centers (intake, listening, paperwork, helping). Truly helping others with more than a bunch of pamphlets has helped us thus far in our recovery. I don't think I could ever stand in front of 5 or 50k again and preach any sort of religious doctrine.

22

Any Dogs Returning to their Vomit Here?

by Solzhenitsyn in

i was wondering if any long time jw's that are now pomo's here on the forum now act in a leadership role within another religious organization?.

i do and would enjoy a bit of conversation with this (i assume minority) "sub-culture" of ex-jw's.

.

Solzhenitsyn

I was wondering if any long time JW's that are now POMO's here on the forum now act in a leadership role within another religious organization?

I do and would enjoy a bit of conversation with this (I assume minority) "sub-culture" of ex-JW's.

15

US & UK difference

by Olig in

so i was wondering, is there a difference between the baseline attitudes of jw's in the us and the uk?

i hear tonnes and tonnes of experiences regarding elders chasing people up and hounding them.

and people having to devote their lives to fading out.

Solzhenitsyn

In my opinion and due in no small part to my experience as both a PIMI Elder and now a POMO entire family fader:

A JW in the USA will have to spend a measure of time researching (thru forums like this), planning, and executing a fade within very little margins of error to out-maneuver the WT organizations policies and procedures. All this to pull off a departure that does not result in disfellowshipping and minimizes the shun factor that ~~can~~ will creep in to some degree. For many of us, regular maintenance (deprogramming via various means) is needed to recover mentally, emotionally, and spiritually while not setting off any alarms that could attract the attention of the JW police.

Friends who are POMO in the UK have told me they didn't have to put much effort into taking their quiet leave from the borg and the elders in 4 out of 5 of their cases never followed up whatsoever.

My impression is that there are LESS drama loving narcissistic elder policemen in the UK vs. USA.

3

Conducting the B School

by Solzhenitsyn in

so how many of us who conducted the b school have the reoccurring flashbacks every damn time we now pomo, put our hand on blinds to raise or lower them?.

we either fiddled with lowering them every week as we got the school underway or fiddled with to raise them to "listen in to the #3 in progress" up front.

every time i grab the pull string or the louver adjustment wand anywhere i inevitably have a kh ops moment of pause.

Solzhenitsyn

So how many of us who conducted the B school have the reoccurring flashbacks every damn time we now POMO, put our hand on blinds to raise or lower them?

We either fiddled with lowering them every week as we got the school underway or fiddled with to raise them to "listen in to the #3 in progress" up front.

Every time I grab the pull string or the louver adjustment wand ANYWHERE I inevitably have a KH ops moment of pause.

38

Do You Have A Negative Outlook Because You Were Once A JW?

by minimus in

jw
friends

it could be argued that exjws have issues in life simply because they were jehovah’s witnesses at a point in their lives.

.

do you think you or we are fairly normal considering we were jehovah’s witnesses or do you think we have a lot of baggage because we are a bit messed up ( even if we don’t even know it)?.

Solzhenitsyn

My answer to the OP question = Yep

Just when I have moments of..."freedom, the world is beautiful, im healthy, my marriage is better than ever, kids are healthy, whole family are critical thinkers now, more income than ever, zero debt, enjoying vacations like never before, #bestlifeever, ect...." then BANG!!!....in floats the "oh shit, I just gave the WT the middle finger and killed my family and am the scum Jesus said to never eat with, and am the worst reproach to Jehovah's name, and on and on."

I'm convinced that: born in JW's who spent DECADES being the best JWs they could be are inevitably F'ed up for a lengthy period of time if not a lifetime. Like the ORG is just embedded into the mitochondira of our DNA. Lord if only there was a pill I could take and make everything JW go away in my mind.

62

In Sydney, and ex jw gathering, with an apperance by Angus Stewart!

by nonjwspouse in

this happened yesterday.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pfyty9bs3i.

Solzhenitsyn

Perhaps this was posted elsewhere and I missed it but...How does one go about finding out in advance about these events. I would so be encouraged to be able to go and listen and chat.

12

When you missed several consecutive meetings or took a vacation did you feel "weird" when you returned?

by Tenacious in

every now and again i would miss meetings due to health, surgeries, work etc.. when i would miss a meeting here and there i didn't particularly feel this "weirdness.".

it wasn't until i would miss 3 or more consecutive meetings that i felt this weirdness upon entering the kh.. i can't really explain it but it feels like i was entering the kh for the first time.

it's not like when you take a 2 week vacation and come back to work.

Solzhenitsyn

Yep, especially as an elder.

If smack about an elder was going to be talked about, 9 out of 10 times it came up at the elders meeting where he was on vacation or away giving a talk.

Over my tenure as an elder, 2 brothers came back from vacation to face having their "qualifications reviewed."

Needless to say, when I came back from vacation i always felt weird until I confirmed fellow elders exuded a business as usual attitude.

1

Emotional Tugging Similarities

by Solzhenitsyn in

jw
friends

"as jw's we are the only organization that __________".

yeah no, no your not.

how long will tugging at the emotions of it members last to keep them 'in'?

Solzhenitsyn

"As JW's we are the only organization that __________". Yeah No, no your not.

How long will tugging at the emotions of it members last to keep them 'in'? Once they have exhausted this sort of rhetoric, what will be next?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5FxdCgD-qI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6330vx3q0Q&t=101s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdN8rfwW3SI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dbk091DMXAk

13

"Its not about the numbers...Its about Love"

by Solzhenitsyn in

in the org did anyone ever tell you that its not about the numbers...yet the reality was that it was all about the numbers?.

i ran into a pimi who asked why my family and i were awol.

i told him that it was private and personal and i wasn't at liberty to discuss it.

Solzhenitsyn

In the ORG did anyone ever tell you that its not about the numbers...Yet the reality was that it was ALL about the numbers?

I ran into a PIMI who asked why my family and I were AWOL. I told him that it was private and personal and I wasn't at liberty to discuss it. He then asked quite the question coming from a PIMI..."Have you found any positive aspects from stepping down and not associating with the congregation anymore?" Great question that needed a careful answer.

I wanted to throw him a bone so I told him that no longer keeping track of and discussing numbers, hours, and averages that make up the yardstick by which my and others spiritual worth was measured has been a great relief. I shook his hand and gave him a bro hug while vocalizing a "I love you...unconditionally." He got the implication immediately and said "Its not about the numbers, its about Love."

I smiled and told him, "you keep telling yourself that," and walked away.

Here is a snippet from one of my last elders quarterly meetings with the CO. The agenda was written by the CO.