Posts by SummerAngel

23

Help with acceptance for JW family still in

by MaryKN in

well, it's been a long time!

i first lurked here around 20 years ago and read huge amounts of threads which certainly helped when i was making my decision to leave the religion.

i was never baptised (resisted it!

SummerAngel

See I never found the confrontation worked for me they read aggressive apostate backed into a corner. I found my stronger card was to be the daughter I wanted to be , I found by minimising and ignoring their cult it reduced the impact. I've found the questioning stopped after a couple of years. Now we do occasionally talk about God and I've even had some acceptance about my beliefs but I appreciate that is rare. I would react to the questions empathically_ ' I appreciate you care but I'm fine ' type approach

I did ask a very telling question however I asked my mother " if thexWT conflicts with the bible who do you believe?' She was pretty stumped at that..

In terms of sadness as I said before I feel pity for them and a bit embarrassed. They went to a local shop to by foil blankets for their go bag recently. I can just imagine the conversation in the shop. Then I thought most normal people would see my own parent's as loonie amagedon hunters which they are I guess it was just a rare glimpse of how odd their normal really is.

26

When is the last time you saw an educated middle class family become Jehovah's Witnesses?

by xjwsrock in

we know from casual observation that if anybody does respond to their preaching/recruiting work it is usually someone that is a social misfit in some way or a person that was indoctrinated early in life.. think about all the nicer neighborhoods witnesses preach in.

if a family of four with a father that is an engineer and a mother who is a medical professional ever walked into a kingdom hall for the first time and said they were studying, people would faint.

lol.... this of course isn't what you would expect from a religion backed by the ultimate intelligent creator.

SummerAngel

My family are however they converted decades ago but in a Cong of window cleaners, IT and retail professionals stand out. I've known a few people part way through uni degrees heading for good jobs bail and go into retail or pioneering . my dad particularly is a reader and thinker and I do wonder how he can be taken in by such nonsense. Interestingly he's never had any jobs to do ( they aren't privileges they're jobs)

23

Help with acceptance for JW family still in

by MaryKN in

well, it's been a long time!

i first lurked here around 20 years ago and read huge amounts of threads which certainly helped when i was making my decision to leave the religion.

i was never baptised (resisted it!

SummerAngel

Just to answer the questions you pose at the end such as does it make me sad? With regard to my parents saddens me to see unwaivering loyalty to such an uncaring group and even worse that they have so litre self esteem they can't see it. For example even in very poor health and inclement weather they still 'cart' or attend meetings late at night. With online stuff there is no excuse too big or talk too small to miss. I've rarely seen people round offering to help. I see wasted lives, my parents aren't drones they are quite odd ball and very middle class I suspect the only reason they haven't been pulled up for fraternizing with us is that they give handsomely to the Borg although I have no evidence of this. We do family ccassionally have spiritual ding dongs but I've found these counter productive its better to show love and when praised for our kindness I drop in stuff like- ' I don't think you're used to this' or ' that's what Christians do" and just shrug not making a big thing of it.

My sibling on the other hand had woken up and started to fade, he then married a devout JW and has been awful ever since, they virtually shun us. We did have a close relationship for many years but that's just gone. This makes me feel sad angry and frustrated i cannot see how he cannot see but i suspect he isnt in it for the belief but because his Mrs makes him toe the line. Her family are very presurizing so i see him as weak.

The only other issue with trying to wake someone up is it reveals to them just how apostate your views really are. If as in sibling and in law they return they have even more ammo to use against you and shun you.

23

Help with acceptance for JW family still in

by MaryKN in

well, it's been a long time!

i first lurked here around 20 years ago and read huge amounts of threads which certainly helped when i was making my decision to leave the religion.

i was never baptised (resisted it!

SummerAngel

I'm in a very similar situation, for me its been 27 years and for most of that time I've been openly BA Christian. Initially they were pretty awful lots of comments etc like ' we will be in paradise without you but you will be erased from our memory" my mum can be quite spiteful at times. Because I wasn't baptised I was never dissed so I've always remained in contact in fact even stayed with them for a year recently. When I first left I wsd naive it never occurred to me that they may shun Mr, if it had I would have probably thought twice but never regretted a day of leaving. I also have 1 sibling in and an in-law , sibling has caused issues. In terms of hoping they will wake up. Religion is the elephant in the room. I try and say positive stuff about church and why I'm happy there occasionally I can tend to jump on any negative JW stuff and when I told them the facts that the world is getting better not worse you could have heard a pin drop. However they are now in their dotage we just show them lots of love and care. My days of playing scripture ping pong with them are long gone. Yes I wish and pray for them to wake up but I have my doubts now and feel the shock of an entirely wasted life would be too much ( they are in 80s). I worry more about the damaged relationship with my sibling who has chosen after yes of inactive to become aggressively JW. Its difficult but put the bible away no one was ever logic"d to God, be everything they told you you couldn't be without their religion.

14

Not A Day Goes By Without Me Thinking About Watchtower

by pale.emperor in

although i consider myself completely "cured" from watchtower brainwashing, guilt tripping and propaganda, i realised today that there's not a day that goes by without me thinking of the cult we left.

i think of my former family and what i'd like to say to them, what i'd try to explain and how i'd say it without them switching the "ignore" button and running away.. today on my instagram account my little step-brother "liked" a picture i posted.

i didn't even know he was still on my friends list.

SummerAngel

Hi PE, this post made me think. I've been out longer than I was in however due to a relocation move I am now living closer to people still in than I have for 15 yes and this has reawakened my fascination with WTS stuff. I watch family trotting off to their indoctrination sessions and I see evidence of wasted lives, no provision for old age either materially or emotionally and feel like I want to scream wake up to this nonsense. Whilst away I lived in a non JW bubble in which our 2 vastly different cultures never met and polite conversation not talking about religion was had. I maintained good relationships with patents and siblings including 1 still in and Jdubbery was the elephant in the room. Since moving back ironically closer to be with family the differences in culture are all too evident. My brother who I have enjoyed a great close relationship with for the last 20 yes who almost left and wanted to fade has now shunned me. My others brothers wife who returned to the cult is now quite off with us. Fortunately my patents have remained OK.

There are also loads of psychological reminders that never go away. This thing divides families and scars people for life. I was one of the lucky ones born in I escaped and got an education and never got baptised. I also remained in contact with some family. But on the plus side we are all a product of our background and the struggles I had made me who I am today. Leaving the Borg meant I could reinvent myself to be who I wanted to be.

28

Baptism statistics from CO

by neat blue dog in

just went to the assembly yesterday and during the final talk the circuit overseer said:.

'sure, there are some adults baptised here and there, but do you want to know something wonderful?

the vast majority of those getting baptized are teens and preteens!

SummerAngel

This is really more a general comment on numbers rather than baptisms. I feel this recent trend for harsh doctrine has caused the WTS to shoot themselves in the foot. It was done to scare people into remaining active but if they had half a brain cell they would have read the writing on the wall and done things the other way. What I'm trying to say is I wonder if this decline could force a backpedal to more lenient thinking under the banner of ' new light" eg to include inactive ones to 'encourage' them back in. Less DFsing and quicker reinstatement these are their best hope on this sinking ship. It would be a very different tack but also a very quick way of boosting numbers. What do others think?

23

youngest baptised.

by zeb in

jw
friends

what is the youngest you have seen someone baptised?

i recall seeing a 9 yo girl baptised..

SummerAngel

I've noticed a few posts on this site comparing the WT trend of young baptism to the practice of church infant baptism. There is absolutely no comparison. Most churches these days baptise older teens or adults not infants for a start. There is no compulsion to be baptised and once bapped no contract to attend or consequences of breaking rules - there are no rules to break as such. It is simply a show of faith and expression that you are serious about your belief.

As an adult, you may meet a few times with the minister to ensure you understand the step you are taking. On the day you would have the chance to give your testimony and have prayer. There is celebration afterwards whatever the age it isn't a dreadful sombre occasion like in JWs.

23

youngest baptised.

by zeb in

jw
friends

what is the youngest you have seen someone baptised?

i recall seeing a 9 yo girl baptised..

SummerAngel

I am stunned that social Services rant more involved with me practices like this. The implications of what you sign up to are huge. Surely shunning a minor is psychological and emotional abuse

27

An honest question for those who were "born-in"

by stuckinarut2 in

just wanted to ask a question of those who were born in as i was.. how did you feel to have been "privileged to have been born into the only true faith - the truth"?.

did this make you feel confident, or proud - or perhaps arrogant?.

how did you reconcile the fact that 99% of the earth's population was not born "into the truth"?.

SummerAngel

Hi stuck, maybe this is a generational thing but I hated it. My situation was I was born in my patents had been in 1 since childhood the other as a young man. I left approx 30 yrs ago. Family still in. I absolutely don't relate to feeling fortunate or privileged in any way.I felt special all right but in a dreadful why do I have to be saddled with this kinda way. I always had doubts, could never see whole end of world thing happening and always aired to uni from a young age. I recon I tumbled it by about the age of 7 as in TTINTT. Hated every aspect door toor nonsense no one was ever interested. The meeting were iccessantly boring and the only good thing about assembles was volunteering to get out of sitting through the sessions. Also the isolation, bullying and rejection I had for not being able to be part in any of the usual community activities - Xmas and birthday parties but also after school clubs or just school fetes.since leaving and having my own kids I realise how isolating and bizarre my childhood was. For those who didn't grow up in it imagine only mixing with people of identical belief and the same sex as you. Remove all festivals major and minor, all community based activities, all mythological beings, take out all tv, books, toys and clothes with varies, witches, unicorns, superheroes, magic fighting or competitiveness. Never give or receive a greetings card or wrapped present. Give up any hope of pursuing a career of your choice. Oh and don't say " bless you" or ' good luck' to anyone.

The reason I ask if its a generational thing is the modern JWs are far more aggressive and arrogant about their beliefs. The kids are taught to tell other kids they won't play with them as they arnt JWs. The shunning is far more aggressive and the whole thing has a really nasty overtone. Any vestige of Christianity is long gone. I feel sorry for kids growing up in this now.

17

Does the watchtower view anyone that is Df as Gods,enemy

by poopie in

jw
friends

df friend says yes..

SummerAngel

For any lurkers misguided out there the shunning has no biblical basis whatsoever. Ask them to show you a single instance in the bible where Jesus ever disfellowshipped anyone. Those who were repentant were forgiven instantly. Did Jesus say sit at the back for 6 months then you can rejoin the club no forgiveness was instant and rejoicing then happened. The prodigal son is far more about forgiveness then repentance and was instant and constant. The argument about cleansing the congregation falls down because more often than not those daft enough to confess are already feeling guilty or care confessing historical stuff so the argument put by one of the posters earlier is utterly meaningless. For example I know someone that had been living with their boyfriend when out of JW, they felt guilty wanted to come back, moved out planned to marry typical periodical son scenario was there much rejoicing and forgivenes. Are you kidding this is WTS it's sit at the back for a year and think about the error of your ways.

Can I also Chuck in when did Jesus give any other human the power to forgive sins. Could this be another nod to JWs Catholic roots??

They hold this ridiculous view that if if we don't Dis then everyone will run riot but the irony is because they encourage people to mindlessly obey rules rather than develop their immoral compass JWs are frequently less principled, and nastier than those outside it, this is further fuelled by the attitude if you ain't in it you don't matter so they can feel they have no moral obligations to outsiders.

Incidentally I do think WTS have missed a trick because with numbers dropping and so many trying to leave they should loosen not tighten the controls. For example if instead of counting as Dissed those who disappeared long ago or the inactive if they put these into their numbers they could artificially show an increase.

Sorry about 5 other posts here in this