As long as he is willing to listen, keep asking questions. Maybe one of them will get him thinking about the org approved answer.
And I'd agree with you that most of them are really nice people. My wife recently moved back to the English speaking congregation and had them over to our house for a cookout this weekend. Of course I got the - 'it would be nice to see you at the meeting tomorrow' as they were leaving, but it wasn't too bad of an afternoon. At least nobody wanted to sing kingdom melodies!
I know she is hoping one day soon I will come back, but it is just not going to happen.
There is lots of good advice here from others in a similar situation. It sounds like your husband will absorb some of the heat for you, so take advantage of that. Just make it clear to him that you need to slow-down abit.