i remember an elder questioning a woman who had admitted to giving and receiving oral sex from her unbelieving mate.
he asked her the most intimate questions which clearly flustered her.
interestingly, she “confessed “ to the elders because her conscience bothered her.
Some years after leaving I had achieved a Bachelor of Science degree, consciously left religion behind and become an atheist, volunteered for a charity fighting world poverty and my JW mother said 'you are being left behind. We are making spiritual progress and you haven't progressed spiritually at all'
Really nothing I could reply to something as stupid as that.
i ask because i'm working in a 28 day residential addiction treatment center and one of my co-workers is studying with the jw's.
he does not know i'm an xjw.
i suspect that at some point they're going to tell him he can't go to aa meetings anymore.
Yeah I know your higher power can be whatever you choose, my point was would the JWs allow you to do that, in answer to the OP. Do they only recognise Jehovah as their higher power and would they allow you to use him as yours in AA? They probably wouldn't get to know anyway so why worry. Perhaps they would insist it's the GB!
this is my 15th year without going to the memorial.
based on comments, it seems i did not miss anything.
.
Thirty years! When someone hands me a glass of red wine now they expect me to drink it!
i know this thread has probably been covered in the past but i thought it would be nice for newbies and lurkers and just a reminder to those that left a while ago.. how has your life improved since leaving the cult?
are you happy?
have you made some amazing friends or maybe met an amazing partner in the world?.
I lived in near poverty as a JW because of pioneering. Since leaving I've been to Paris, Rome, Athens, watched the the sun rise on the Taj Mahal, seen Niagara Falls, the Alhambra and paintings in the Louvre and the Uffizi. I've seen tulips in Amsterdam, been on a gondola in Venice, walked atop the city wall of Dubrovnik and seen the snow on the Italian Alps at beautiful Lake Como in the spring.
I graduated BSc and found a job I enjoy and watched my beautiful little daughter grow up to be an intelligent woman with a social conscience. She has a BA and MA and is loving teaching children.
I go to the cinema, theatre and have meals out with my meetup group and read books with my book club. If I don't want to go nobody gives me the third degree and that 'we missed you' rubbish. Life isn't perfect, whose life is? The difference is it's my life now, I make my own friends, my own decisions and my own mistakes. I love it.
this post hopefully will get you thinking about therapy, along with good mental and emotional health if you are dealing with the traumatic choices associated with leaving jw's, or if you are considering leaving.
because it is a trauma.. imagine a married couple in their late 30's.
because they took last weeks watchtower seriously, they have decided to talk to an elder in their congregation because they have practiced oral sex on each other, and feel a need to confess and get "spiritual help.".
Agreed, boundaries are very important and for those raised in the cult it's difficult to learn to limit how much you tell people about your life and limit association with toxic people. Counselling can really help because as a JW you weren't supposed to keep anyone at arms length but for a healthy life we need to learn to do that.
last night's memorial talk in my cong went into graphic gruesome details about the torture of jesus and how the stake killed people.
i mean medical level graphic description!
step by step details of each injury and how it killed!
I remember that, six inch nails, the slow asphyxiation of having arms above your head, choking on vinegar given instead of water. Happy days. My childhood Easters and no chocolate!
roll call for the benefit of newbies and lurkers.
in one sentence tell why you left the org.
not 2 sentences.
The religion wanted me to ignore kindness, giving to charity, evolution and my own personal happiness.
so i donate blood because i can.
i donate every 4 months when the bloodmobile comes to my place of work.
i know it helps.. what about you, do you donate blood?
I want to the next time the mobile unit comes to my town. Good for you bikerchic.
page 16, par.
18 carefully follow the latest directions.. do we faithfully follow the latest directions that jehovah has given us?
if so, we will not rely on always doing things the way we have done them in the past.
I agree with WakeMe, how can they say they're not inspired or as Jackson put it, not God's representatives on earth, too presumptuous to say that, yet they go into detail on conduct. Don't wear that dress, don't play air guitar, FFS! How can they know what God wants if he doesn't dictate it to them word for word? Why don't the JWs ask this, I did.
all who are shunned know the adverse effects of such.
we feel it.
we know how it has changed us.
In primitive societies shunning meant death because people couldn't physically survive on their own. I wonder if there is residual hardwiring in our brains that literally makes us frightened we may die if our 'tribe' shuns us.
Although it's completely illogical in our modern world being raised in the closed world of a cult doesn't help. I think leaving and knowing we'll probably be shunned triggers fear for our own survival.
