I would say that guilt is the most destructive emotion we have so if they do ever feel guilty about shunning us then it will eat then alive. That's how evil cults are.
Xanthippe
JoinedPosts by Xanthippe
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9
Shunning Eventually Hurts the Shunner More Than You
by snugglebunny inthis is worth reading.
basically it seems to be referring to the "mean girl" syndrome where girls who were once part of an in-crowd are suddenly ostracised by their peers, the feelings of despair that overwhelm them.
however, social aggressors usually finish up with deep seated problems of their own.
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Baptised 52 years today!
by Phoebe injanuary 29th - my baptism date.
can you remember how you felt at your baptism?.
i got baptised because my dad kept frightening me.
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Xanthippe
RubaDub you are naughty but you reminded me about my baptism venue. Does anyone else have those dreams where you are looking for a loo and there are only dirty public toilets available or there are no doors on the cubicles? It's your subconscious mind stopping you from peeing in your sleep, saying don't do this you're asleep!
Well when I got to the assembly where I was going to get baptised the ladies' loos didn't have any doors on! They were doing a refurb but hadn't quite finished. I should have known then! đ
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Hungry?? Donât worry- Iâll feed you soon....
by stuckinarut2 inhow often have we heard jws (and christians in general) speak about how âgod will step in soon and fix earths woesâ.
a thought came to mind that i would love to calmly say to the person that says we should âwait on godâ.
if your child looks up at you with big eyes, and a pained look on his face and says âdaddy, iâm so hungry.
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Xanthippe
Yeah no one's coming to help us, the world is our problem and it's getting smaller all the time. Hungry people are at the mercy of radicalisation. People are running from war zones or poverty and ending up on our shores and who can blame them. It's no good waiting for God, Jesus or the tooth fairy.
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Shunning Hath Begunith
by Solzhenitsyn inmy spouse assumed that being honest would feel liberating.
appointments were made with pimi parents to let them know of the decision to no longer be a jw.
before the tall nonfat latte at starbucks was half drunk and after her parents asked several direct questions, they stood up, hugged her and said "well this is goodbye, return to jehovah and we'll pick up right where we left off, we love you," and walked out the door.
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Xanthippe
She needs distraction while her feelings start to heal. Perhaps start planning a big trip, somewhere amazing to take her mind of it.
Your wife sounds like a gentle, kind person going by the way she tried to just be a listening ear while on FS. Perhaps when she's ready she could do some voluntary work, with elderly people, in a hospital or a in mental health charity?
Meetup.com is a good idea further down the road. It's helped me to meet people to do things with, theatre, meals out and so on without having to make friends necessarily. She can make friends this way but it is much slower and less intense because they are not conditional friendships like in the JWs. Best of luck to you both.
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Remembering SuziDrums
by 3rdgen inhello friends,.
i don't post here much anymore but still check in to read from time to time.
yesterday i thought i would send a fb msg.
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Xanthippe
I'm so sorry 3rdgen! I just read your thread about how you reconnected with Suzi after all those years. So sad for you to have spent so little time together after she left the Borg and sad for her sons to have lost both parents now. My thoughts are with you đč
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Random Musings of an ex-JW Closing a Chapter
by StarTrekAngel inas you all may recall, i made it public a few months back that i was moving away from my former neighboorhood.
well, we moved into our new place during the christmas/new year week, and it has been an awesome decision.
more on that later.naturally, after having hauled all our "material possessions" to our new place, we embarked on the process of giving our old home a touch of paint, etc.
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Xanthippe
I'm glad you're happy in a lovely new home and that life is working out for you. Another family leaves the cult and makes a success of their lives!
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Prayerfully Considering or Seeing What Sticks
by scotoma inï»żtony says the magical words âprayerfully consideringâ.
presumably, this has been done many times even when they have gotten things wrong.
have a urim and thummim method of knowing the correct interpretations?
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Xanthippe
Presumably, this has been done many times even when they have gotten things wrong. Do they have a Urim and Thummim method of knowing the correct interpretations?
They look into the liver. Not sure whose liver, probably a GB helper who has been disrepectful of their glorious position. -
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Just peeking in for a bit...
by Jidders ini rather apprehensively would like to say hello.. i've been raised somewhat in the truth,one of my parents is rather rather strong in the beliefs but could honestly be considered pomi with how active they are and their side of the family comes from a line of witnesses, the other parent was but faded a long time ago.
as such i was taught quite a bit of jw teachings between family and off and on again bible studies.
recently i had a serious emotional break down over a few months after said pomi parent had advised me that they would not attend my wedding should that day come (i also had recieved a text from my bible teacher i hadnt heard from in a year or two giving a scripture) and it sorta all sank on me that my activity over the last few years was not really jw material.
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Xanthippe
Welcome Jidders - and KevinB. Wow the exJWs will be outnumbering those left in soon. Take your time, there's no rush, no end of the world as we know it is around the corner. Just relax, read what you want online or in the library and when you want a break go enjoy your life.
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I realized today what I am, and why they look at me with contempt
by Tameria2001 intoday my inlaws wanted to meet their new great-grandson.
they hadn't been in our lives since we left the jws back in 2001. but every time, even though very briefly, i was around them, they always had this same look on their face.
it was of utter and complete disgust.
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Xanthippe
Well, guess what? This "zombie" was seated right next to my JW father-in-law, and nowhere to run, and he had to sit there for two hours. lol
Tameria I'm sorry these awful people treat you like this and it is exhausting I know but I'm glad you managed to have a little fun with it. I have to deal with my family at funerals and at my uncle's we all had to go back to my aunt's for food afterward.
Of course they all sat on their bums but I went in the kitchen to help her. She wanted me to go and ask each person what type of sandwiches and which drink they wanted so these people who've shunned me forever were forced to speak to me!
My brother who's an elder was getting more red in the face every time I went up to him. He was so angry I thought he was going to explode! You have to laugh and I'm sure you will when you've recovered. Just enjoy remembering how uncomfortable you made your father-in-law by sitting next to him and all because of a fantasy belief. Silly man.
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I am a proud Jehovah's Witness Defender
by Matthew Jefferson inmy name is matthew j and i have just ended my study with the jehovah's witnesses.
no, i did not stop studying because i believe the jehovah's witnesses are a 'cult', i left due to the minor beliefs that i hold that remain separate from the organization.
i called my elder who is still an amazing man and great counselor, affirming that i do not wish to continue my studying.
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Xanthippe
Hi Matthew, welcome to the forum. I have to say it's not much of a defence. Two posts and then you run away.