Posts by Satanus

in the view of jurors of the grand jury of participants of simons board, within the website of jehovahswitnesses.com, hereby one mindchild summons one joelbear, on or about, henceforth, the date of this post, to a duel of competing paradigms.

Satanus

Joel

Sorry to poke my nose in here. I do so out of a real desire to understand the reason for you decision. I have previously stated on this board that your desicion should be respected. However, as far as i know, you didn't give a clear statement as to why you decided to return to the wt.

Previously, on the occassion when you stated your decision to withdraw from this board, many who cared for you and your wellbeing, including myself, wished you well or appealed to you to reconsider. To me, it would seem that out of respect for the affections of many on this board, the least you could do, after this most recent decision to return to the wt, would be to give a reason WHY?!

Thanks SS

5

What if I don't agree with Jesus?

by Eyebrow in

let's say that one believes jesus was god's son, and that he was perfect, etc.. well, what about this: what if you don't agree with jesus, or god on many things.. i have never thought about that before.

what is your take?

Satanus

Eyeb

For me to disagree w jesus, he would have to tell me something first. Has he told you anything lately?? Or are you just reading words that people have convinced you were spoken by him? I suppose jesus could send me a letter, phone me, send me an email, but since he's so powerful/smart/omnipresent, and since there are so many imposters, i would expect to hear from him personally. Is that too much to ask??

Thanks SS

29

Who will be the next 'king of the north'?

by YoYoMama in

jw
friends

interesting news article: http://web.star-telegram.com/content/fortworth/2002/01/10/dfw/news-011002-02.htm

Satanus

The king of the north is canada, as in the great white north. From here we angry apostates will come riding skidoos, to defile the sanctuary, the brooklyn bethel. Removing our tuques and parkas, we will insinuate ourselves in a bethel tour to sabotage the printing presses, thus putting temporary stop to the daily sacrifice. During the ensuing flooding over and passing through, Bethel security puts in a call to the cops-fbi, reps of the king of the south, who come to the rescue of gods people, wiping up all of the melted snow and ice.

Inspiration is tuning out .. hoping for more transmissions later. If this doesn't end up coming true, then it's that wacky weeds fault for blurring the vision.

SS

8

Guestbook Post

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

the following is a post on my guestbook.

the person did not include their email.

how would you respond?.

Satanus

silent

I'll comment on part of it.

'If the law doesn't require it, then the problem is with the law, not with the elders.'

He's in effect saying, if the elders do wrong by omission, it's not their fault, it's the govt fault. This shows extreme pro wt bias. The wt claims to have the highest possible standards of justice, cleanliness and loving care, yet when it's not administered or proves to be nonexistant, he blames the govt, which has much lower standards and furthermore doesn't claim such lofty standards. Their own book says, of the one who has much, much will be demanded. By their own profession, the wt has more knowledge/truth/responsibility than any other org.

The person making these comments is very bent, a result of wt indoctrination.

SS

32

The most inefficient workers in history

by RunningMan in

jw
friends

i thought this was a little odd, so i did some calculations to see if my observations were correct.. last year, there were 107,218 jws in canada.

they reported 18,544,473 hours of field service.

this activity resulted in 2,030 new baptisms.

Satanus

Chicklette

Cool name, and welcome!

So, in what part of canada are you? I'm in que.

SS .. only a small devil

32

The most inefficient workers in history

by RunningMan in

jw
friends

i thought this was a little odd, so i did some calculations to see if my observations were correct.. last year, there were 107,218 jws in canada.

they reported 18,544,473 hours of field service.

this activity resulted in 2,030 new baptisms.

Satanus

Well guys, you have just cured yoyo and nytel of further door to door syndrome. Now they will be spending all there time here, arguing w apostates. After all, they got joelbear back.

SS laughing

15

Naturally occuring nuclear reaction

by Simon in

jw
friends

i know we are surrounded by them (ie.

stars) but i was listening to the radio yesterday and was amazed to hear that there was evidence that a nuclear reaction had occured naturally on earth at some point.. apparently, all the conditions that are neccessary were there - water to slow the neutrons down, a deposit of uranium for fuel and carbon to prevent a 'meltdown' happening.. they said it was in south africa somewhere (not sure if the county or the continent).

has anyone else heard of this?

Satanus

Simon

Yes, seriously i remember reading something about this a few years ago in some sience mag. I don't remember the details, though.

Also, after that i read of something a lot more 'out there'. Something to the effect that at one time the whole earth, from the core outward was set up as a neuclear reactor, w uranium at the center, water cooling, lead/gold shielding etc. It was supposed to have been a self heated planet. Then something happened and all the layers got scrambled. I think the theory was that the 'gods' over mined the earths crust, unbalancing it, thus .. scramblation.

Anyway, what you read about makes more sense.

Thanks SS

26

Proof the WT is God's Org?

by mindfield in

jw
friends

i recall a conversation i once had with my jw uncle about the many doctrinal flip-flops, the blood issue, and how some in the cong.

treated me like @w#$@ even though i was never baptized.. funny, the only thing he could defend himself with was "well, do you know of any other religion that insists on god's name?

" i didn't know of any, so i coudn't really say yes.

Satanus

The name jehovah was invented by a monk of the catholic church. I guess they were inspired and have the truth. The wt just borrowed it.

SS

83

I Don't Sympathise With Suicides

by Englishman in

jw
friends

let me explain.. firstly i have seen any number of so-called attempted suicides.

i've walked past an old girl friends house, seen her watching tv through the window, by the time i'm knocking on the door she's told me that she had her head in the gas oven and my knock stopped her.. my mother in law walks into the sea for a pastime.

every time she can't get her own way she walks in up to her knees and waits for someone to see her.

Satanus

Ok, i'll post something radical.

Steps for handling suicidals:

1. Talk to them, hear their story, give them attention, love etc, try to help them.
2. If the person seriously wants to end it, respect that decision.
3. Form suicide priesthood, which will perform appropriate cleansing/blessing cerimonies to aide the suicidee to reach a better place in the afterlife.
4. Have spiritualist psychics perform afterdeath services to help spirit of deceased ascend properly.

I'm running for cover now, bye.

SS