I am a born-in but left nearly a year ago at age 16. I would say when I was a jw and was still fully convinced that it is the truth, I was happier. I have a hope then. Maybe ignorance is not a bad thing after all.
Now that I am out. I faced the question many people have : What is the purpose of life?
I cannot be happy when I find no answer....
I am now able to do things that were forbidden by the wt. I have done them all. Sex, blood, birthdays, christmas...I need to force myself to do these things at first. But now, they are norm to me. But I am still not happy.
I was like a terminally ill patient. Someone lied to me that there is a cure for it. I was happy and hopeful. But then I found out that it was a lie.......