Posts by silentlambs

4

child abuse

by jamaica in

my first post and question.. can you direct me or give me any info that the people running the show in new york mandated in writting that abuse and or molestion should be kept within the ranks only and no outsiders should be told or notified?.

tnx.

jamaica

silentlambs

If you wish email me and I wil be gald to help you with any questions.
[email protected]

104

Regarding MAD APOSTATE

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i wish to make a comment on something that disturbs me deeply to the point i cannot let it pass or be ignored.

a little over a year ago i resigned as an elder to protest wt policy and how it hurt children.

the impetus that brought me to that conclusion was a child i knew personally that was in danger.

silentlambs

I wish to make a comment on something that disturbs me deeply to the point I cannot let it pass or be ignored. A little over a year ago I resigned as an elder to protest WT policy and how it hurt children. The impetus that brought me to that conclusion was a child I knew personally that was in danger. To stand up for her eventually meant a stand against six million misinformed JWs. It is a simple point that many have joined with a basic conclusion; we will not support or condone anyone who hurts children or victims of child molestation. If that happens to be the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society then so be it. But is that the only entity that we take this stand against? If so, that would make us nothing less than simple WT haters and what is good accomplished in that?

I recall a few months ago when I was at the trial in Ritzville Washington. A local reporter asked for information about the trial. We offered to provide it on the condition that she wait till the trial starts before she published the material. The reason was the possibility it could cause difficulty for the defense in providing an impartial jury. The reporter broke her word and ran the story a week before the trial. In the end it did not do any real damage but it caused some very stressful moments before the trial. When the reporter approached me for comment during the trial I told her, “no comment.” When she asked me why, I stated, “You broke your word to me and your actions placed the victim in a difficult position I do not help people who hurt victims.” At that point I encouraged everyone there to not offer her any comments. Why? For the reason stated above. If you hurt victims you become an enemy of silentlambs. It would be inconsistent to condemn WT and not condemn others who might do the same.

A few days ago I posted a victims story on this forum, as I have done this many times before, it helps to bring the issue back up and shows new victims come in every week. As I have previously mentioned stories are posted at a five to one ratio. That means for every five I hear, one person will send me the story to be posted publicly. Most are just not ready, this is perfectly understandable, yet others want to add their voice to the hundreds that are speaking out with the hope in the end it will protect children. Their courage is to be honored and appreciated for they are the true heroes of the silentlambs issue. I do not know why but with this victim’s story three people chose to challenge the way certain statements were made. I tried on three occasions to defuse the negative comments and two of the posters came around and either allowed room for misunderstanding or apologized. This was commendable as it helped the victim to see it was not intentioned the way it may have appeared.

One poster on the other hand made no such move he called her a liar repeatedly and demanded actual police reports before he would ever believe otherwise. I requested that Simon remove the thread from the board due to the cutting remarks. This is unacceptable it crossed the line and is not to be tolerated. This person calls themselves “Mad Apostate.” I do not know if you were having a bad day or if you simply were not thinking, but I would encourage you to think long and hard about what you have done. You owe the victim and this board a public apology for your actions. You were wrong, you hurt a victim of child molestation, you insulted her, and you would be better served to make it right. This is not a place for smart remarks or idle threats, but if you feel you have the right to hurt victims of child molestation, that is not freedom of speech it is pure evil. I offer you this opportunity to correct your mistake.

I have also noted comments of an “insider elite” that control the board. This is simple paranoid delusional thinking. There is not a secret organization or special group of insiders who control everything. If you wish to know something communicate! Email and use the telephone that is the way you find stuff out. As I mentioned from the beginning of the silentlambs issue, by any means necessary I wish to force the wt to change policy to protect children. I will talk to anyone anywhere anytime, if you wish to help lets talk and see what can be accomplished. That is not an insider club it is an effort of those who wish to assist in a common goal. Different people offer different things, some do not have computers but together I think it is a collective effort by those who do what their heart motivates them to. Other people may have different agendas they wish to accomplish, yet, while I have talked to many people I have yet to find any evidence of some well-financed apostate conspiracy that operates like the CIA to destroy the wt at all costs. That is simple JW think. You see JW’s want all JWs to believe that there is this huge organization ran by the Devil that is seeking to destroy God’s people. Are you going to fall for the same claptrap? Face the reality that anything that is being accomplished is done by people like you and me who get off our asses and put forth the effort to do something meaningful. So if you think you are missing out on some inside information please follow the sentence that preceded this one, then you can be an “insider” to.

8

Dateline airtime update added to website

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i have decided to add a weekly update to when the dateline story might air.

the latest info should go up each monday.

of course when i know for sure it will be posted there first.

silentlambs

There is information on the sl datleine page as to how to contact dateline as well as how to get the video or transcript. The weekly update will be at the bottom of the page.

8

Dateline airtime update added to website

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i have decided to add a weekly update to when the dateline story might air.

the latest info should go up each monday.

of course when i know for sure it will be posted there first.

silentlambs

I have decided to add a weekly update to when the dateline story might air. The latest info should go up each monday. Of course when I know for sure it will be posted there first. I am also adding an audio recording of Erica and fellow advocates speaking at the sentencing hearing of Manuel Beliz a convicted child molester. A transcript of the tape will also be provided, but you have to hear it it is very moving. Especially when you read the letters given to the judge in private by twenty nine JW's who tell about how much they love Manuel to be around their children and how zealous he is in service. Do you see something wrong with this picture?

More stories added to victims page also.

7

MR.Bowen

by Danni in

jw
friends

mr.bowen, i just finished reading from your site.

i take it you are a high raking offical in the organization?

it was brave for you to stand up for the "little lambs" who cannot speak for themselves.. i have this question: do you feel like leaving was wise ??

silentlambs

You wrote,

I have this question: Do you feel like leaving was wise ?? after all you could have worked from the inside to gather information such as documents etc that will be needed for edvidence in a court of law.

Please read my website you will see the documentation is to be found there with much more as the need arises. As you might need to go back and review, I did not leave, I resigned as an elder in protest of WT policy and to speak publicly on that issue.

You wrote,

See Mr. Bowen it's very difficult to prove sexual assualt cases in court these days. I have witness many perpetrators walk out clean because there was not enough evdience to convict them with. I am sure you friend may have said something about that.

This I am well aware of as you will note from the "victims" page, most are not reported and the few that are, do not have absolute justice. The point is when a religion supresses a victim from getting help the damage is far greater to them emotionally as well as other children who may come into harms way by having the protection of the church.

You wrote,

With you no longer being there the pervert can now run free and be perhaps be alone with other children. Do you have any idea if the members in the church are aware of your reasons for leaving?? If so this just may work out to protect children.

The reason for my leaving was on the front page of the local papers more than once. In addition the man was reported to local authorities. I made sure of that when I resigned.

You wrote,

Mr. Bowen if you can get back in there...........No I won't tell you to do something dangerous.......Your speaking out is good.

I have been demonized to all church members to such an extent they are afraid to talk to me. I have been forbidden to speak with anyone in the church about the matter or face being disfellowshipped. This has been announced from the platform. I see no purpose in serving again as an elder in a totally corrupt organization that makes the lucid choice to perpetrate a policy that hurts children.

You wrote,

I can understand the church keeping certain matters confidential but the abuse especailly sexual abuse of children is one place they should drawn the line. And besides it would have looked better for all Jehovah's Witnesses to say they remove these types from their religion than keeping them in.

Now you are beginning to understand WT policy. The image of the organization is far more important to the leadership than the reporting of crime. Confidentiality is used to shield pedophiles and thus prevent the public from knowing the extent of this problem. The longer it goes the more self-perpetuating the problem becomes.

You wrote,

Thank you for the information and phone number. If there's anything I can do from this side please don't hesitate to let me know.

I hope this helps clear up your questions, much more can be found by reviewing the website as I believe you will be able to educate yourself as to how the problem has become endemic to JW's.

26

And they talk about love?

by Xena in

jw
friends

with the 4th anniversary of my parents death looming and the anniversary of their last wedding anniversary party where my family was together and happy for the last time just being past ....i was feeling kind of depressed and wanted to reach out to what family i have left.

i sat there and debated in my mind if i should do it...should i try and reach out to my sister..see if i could reach her across the barrier of the jw religion.

should i try to remind her that we are sisters...we were sisters before we became jws and we will always be sisters.

silentlambs

I think this could fit for sisters to, mine hasn't called me for one year.

A Family Lost-A Family Gained

A little boy of three goes for a walk with his dad and life could not be better. The world is an adventure with places to be explored and the comfort of knowing if things get rough dad’s hand is always there to guide you through. As you ply him with questions about everything you see this boundless source of wisdom seems to know the answer to every difficulty you face. A trail through the forest would be far to frightful to traverse alone, but with dad you are invincible.

Time passes

Now you are eight, dad doesn’t seem to be quite as tall as he once was and as you walk the same trail dad’s hand is the last thing you would want to hold onto. You keep getting to far away and he repeatedly calls you back. You have fun anyway and really deep down you are glad he is there, just in case something were to go wrong you know solving the problem would not be your responsibility.

Time passes

You are now a man, fifteen is such a great age you can see everything so clearly and some things you may prefer not to see. Dad embarrasses you in front of your friends, it appears he has a temper problem and you try to pretend it does not exist. You learn to act like everything is ok to those on the “outside” while inside your young mind cannot solve the dysfunction of the family. So you stay away as much as you can, hoping that things will somehow solve themselves in your absence. The fact remains the family is still in place and if trouble were to arise you know deep down they would help you.

Time passes

Now you wonder what a man is, you are 35 with children of your own. You appreciate in a much deeper way the sacrifice your parents made as you raise your children. You want to share your life with your parents as you feel you can relate closely to them with all that you have experienced. You try to understand their problems and make excuses for the bad behavior and embarrassing situations they put you into. Over and over you try to reach out, yet over and over you are made to know deep down they really just do not have the capacity to feel and express love. After being hurt along with your family on many occasions you finally give up. You give up not on trying, but instead on trust. No longer can your heart bear the pain of constant betrayal of what true love means. You wonder if you were really down and out would they be there for you?

Time passes

You finally feel you are learning what a man is at 45. You have watched your children grow and tried to impart to them the love and security you seldom felt in your life. You muse to yourself, “they just do not know how good they have it”. Then there is your parents, bitter, arrogant, haughty, vindictive. Occasionally they do have their moments, like when they stop by ever six months or so to throw a fifty at the kids and then get back to their real life. As you watch the parents of others, you have the feeling of a person who has lost the use of his legs. He will never run or walk again so why fret or wish he could do so. It is a lost cause. So to with parents who do not care to love. You stand always willing to give it another chance, but sadly you seem to always know the outcome. Life is without the safety net so many seem to enjoy, no backup, no assistance, no assurance, no help, you are truly on your on. Sometimes you wish you were that little child of three with dad’s hand close by, but now you are in the forest, you look around and no one is there. The journey of life lay yet before you, your children have the security as best you can offer, your parents will soon be in your care, it is just a matter of time and you accept this responsibility. As for you, what is left, but to try and live your life as the person your parents will never be.

87

Mother's Letter To Start Off The New Year...

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i received this letter from my mother over the weekend, it came with a card and a special note to my children.

i plan to let them read it someday, not today..... silentlambs.

december 20,2001 .

silentlambs

Thanks again for the different viewpoints and opinions concerning this matter, what is that scripture "in the multitude of counslers there is much good?" or words to that effect. Each person has to take all the facts into consideration before any final decision and I guess that is why we just have to do the best we can with the circumstances at hand. This thread has provoked several helpful suggestions on how to deal with difficult parents. Each suggestion could be useful for for certain situations. These matters are painful to discuss but I think it has a certain therapudic effect to be better prepared the next "letter" you may receive in the mail.

I hold hope someday my parents will come around and do better, it is a small hope but hope just the same. If that day ever comes I will gladly forget the past and try and make the best of the future. I know my parents are not happy, but if they can learn to deal with fundimentals that a loving relationship requires they will be much better people in the end and that is not dependant on them being JW's or not. I believe I have learned in the last year to be open minded when it comes to different belief systems. Jw's disserve no less accomadation they just have to learn to respect the boundaries of each family.

I choose to keep my final decison private so that in the end those with difficult situations who may read this thread can make their decision based on all the good advice offered here. I just hope no one cuts donuts in their parents yard.

87

Mother's Letter To Start Off The New Year...

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i received this letter from my mother over the weekend, it came with a card and a special note to my children.

i plan to let them read it someday, not today..... silentlambs.

december 20,2001 .

silentlambs

Thanks for the concern, I will send you an email with further info. I might say this to all: my family has always been my priority yet the balance has to be who comes first, your wife and children or your parents? I have made my choice.

87

Mother's Letter To Start Off The New Year...

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i received this letter from my mother over the weekend, it came with a card and a special note to my children.

i plan to let them read it someday, not today..... silentlambs.

december 20,2001 .

silentlambs

I would like to say I appreciate the many remarks and reads given this topic. All good advice and observations coming from many different perspectives, is that not what a discussion board is all about? My purpose in posting the letters from my parents is to help many see that they are not alone and from the replies, many have basically the same response from their JW parents. It helps you to think about your response to those within this religion and be better prepared when a letter such as this arrives in the mail. This is a very personal part of my life yet I feel it is one that should be shared as I think the help and understanding of the dynamics at play here can help the many others who deal and are yet to deal with this situation in their family.

I went to my parents in the fall of 2000 and explained the issue at stake with WT policy and told them if their was no effort by the Society to do the right thing I was going to have to stand up. I will never forget being told by my mother I had their complete support. That ended when I resigned as elder though I told them I was going to do so.
It is a long sad story, yet the point is how quickly you go from hero to 0 in the JW mindset.

I remember my grandparents they were always so kind and loving. I never doubted for a minute that they loved me, wanted to be part of my life and now that they are gone I wish so much that my children could have known them. They were never JW’s. My children have not seen their grandparents in a year and frankly did not see them much before that. I feel the loss for my children I know what it is like to have loving grandparents.

I hope this thread will make others think about what cult mind control does to families and how it justifies their actions. I hope it can help many others see they are not alone we all have to deal with this problem when we learn to be clear thinkers. I do not defend the letter I wrote as I mentioned I spoke from my heart, it is how I feel is the best way to address the situation I am in. Your situation may be different which would call for a totally different response that is your personal decision. The older I get in life the more unsure I have become of anything being absolutely the right thing to do. If you agree with my letter, fine if not that is fine to, at least it made the reader think about their response when faced with a similar situation. If this thread helped you good! If it made you mad, that is good to, as it motivated you to think and speak out about how you feel. That can be better than holding things in.

I think of the saying, “If everybody likes you it means you are doing nothing.” I doubt that saying will ever be said about me.

87

Mother's Letter To Start Off The New Year...

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

i received this letter from my mother over the weekend, it came with a card and a special note to my children.

i plan to let them read it someday, not today..... silentlambs.

december 20,2001 .

silentlambs

I have tried the kind route, it just makes them feel they are right. The interesting part is I am not DF or DA nor have I challenged any JW doctrine. I have not been kicked out of the organization as the Society has no basis to do so. Yet my parents seem to have written my family and I off anyway. Well I thought about it for a couple of days and wrote the letter below tonight. Instead of trying to ignore the barbs, I thought I would just write back to them the way I truly feel. No tricks, no games, no hidden agendas, just the plain truth.

silentlambs

December 31, 2001

Dear Mom and Dad,

I recently received your letter in the mail and all I can say is, WOW! How easy it has become to spew such venom based on conditional love. Let’s see if I have this straight unless we agree to the “condition” of being "quiet" Jehovah’s Witnesses you never want to be around your grandchildren, speak with your son, speak to your grandchildren, and we are dead. Yet you really, really love us, at least the children and I, did you forget my wife?

You have never “lost” me, as I have never forbidden you to see, call, or share our lives in anyway. You see you have made a choice and then you try to blame it on me. Your choice has made you lose so much, yet you blindly choose to allow cult mind control to prevent you from being part of our lives. It therefore forces me to make one stipulation, if and when you decide to be part of our lives. Please do not discuss JW doctrine with my family as I think it is not productive and a source of contention. I believe your twisted viewpoint would be objectionable even to the Society and I do not wish the children to be exposed to this type of destructive thinking. On the other hand, if you wish to talk about positive things and enjoy being with your family you are welcome at anytime, our arms are always open to you.

Do you really believe God will bless you for acting this way? Will regualr pioneering absolve you of your actions against your family? Is this how you define the word love? The bible offers a definition you seem to have forgotten:
1 Corinthians 13:1-8 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels but do not have love, I have become a sounding [piece of] brass or a clashing cymbal. And if I have the gift of prophesying and am acquainted with all the sacred secrets and all knowledge, and if I have all the faith so as to transplant mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. And if I give all my belongings to feed others, and if I hand over my body, that I may boast, but do not have love, I am not profited at all. Love is long-suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

So as you move your mountains for the WT Society just remember it means NOTHING if you do not have love. Your love appears to be suffering and unkind, (you tell us we will be destroyed) looking for its own interests,(you say we can only be around you on your terms) easily provoked, keeping account of perceived injury, (you continue to recall events you caused five years ago and blame me for all the wrong) rejoices with lies, (you serve leaders who are lying hypocrites that hurt children) bears nothing, (you say be a JW or we disown you) believes only the worst, (you say we are going to be destroyed for protecting children) you offer no hope, you give up on me and my children, (you tell my children unless they leave their parents you want no part of them)your actions prove to me beyond any doubt your love is a “clashing cymbal” because you suffer from cult mind control. I am sad for you and all you miss by not having biblical love for your son and his family. If you ever wish to cut back on literature placements and show real love by spending some of that "service" time with those who share your blood and really do care about you, you are welcome at anytime. You see our love is not “conditioned” on cult mind control.

Your son