jp1692

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Posts by jp1692

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  48

  Healing & Rebuilding Your Life - Feedback Wanted

  by jp1692 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have been invited to speak at an international cultic studies association workshop this fall.

  i could use your help in focusing on my presentation subject.. these workshops are for former members of any cult or other high-control, authoritarian group, not just jehovah's witnesses.

  last year, i spoke at one of their larger conferences in europe.

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  jp1692

  Again, thanks to all that have responded. It really helps when you rank the topics, particularly when you make it clear what you think is most/least important. I’m keeping score and using it to help me focus my presentation.

  Your follow-up comments are also adding a lot of clarity.

  TO BE CLEAR: there are obviously a lot of other topics I could discuss, many of which are important. But I have already committed to presenting on one of the six from the OP. I’m just trying to get a sense from my fellow forum members which of these you think would have been most useful to you when you left the cult and similarly for others. Sorry if that wasn’t clear.

  OTWO: so are you saying that you think “Treatments & Interventions” is the most important issue for people that have left a cult? What do you think is the least important from my list and why?

  Stuck, thanks for the kind words. I want to be sure I’m understanding you. Similar to what I asked OTWO above, do you think “Discovering Your Authentic Self“ is our most important issue after leaving a cult? How would you rank the others.

  CoCo, I always love your non-linear approach! I look forward to your promised “more later.”

  SBF, I want to explore your thoughts on the “authentic self” concept, but again, I don’t want to bias the discussion just yet with my views so I’ll circle back to this later. In the meantime I’m enjoying everyone’s contributions!

  Again, many thanks to all for your feedback and suggestions. They are greatly appreciated.
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  15

  Starting a X-Cult support group. Any suggestions?

  by Still Totally ADD in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  mrs. add and i have seen a need in our area for this.

  it all started over month ago when she gave her yearly talk on what is a cult at our local uu congregation.

  their was several newcomers in the audience who have recently left the high control cults.

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  jp1692

  I saw this thread when it was first posted and meant to comment but got sidetracked ...

  There is an organization known as the International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA). I have attended a couple of their conferences and workshops and will actually be presenting at one coming up in the fall. (Click here for details.)

  As stated on their website: "ICSA is a global network of people concerned about psychological manipulation and abuse in cultic or high-demand groups, alternative movements, and other environments."

  You might find some of their resources helpful in your endeavor to create a support group for ex-cult members.

  I know that I greatly benefitted from participating at the conference and workshop I attended. One of the biggest takeaways for me was learning that -- although all cults seem superficially very different -- all cults are essentially very similar. It's all about one thing: control.
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  48

  Healing & Rebuilding Your Life - Feedback Wanted

  by jp1692 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have been invited to speak at an international cultic studies association workshop this fall.

  i could use your help in focusing on my presentation subject.. these workshops are for former members of any cult or other high-control, authoritarian group, not just jehovah's witnesses.

  last year, i spoke at one of their larger conferences in europe.

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  jp1692

  Thanks to all that have posted. Your comments and suggestions are greatly appreciated and very helpful.

  I'm not going to directly respond to any posts just yet as I don't want to bias any future posters, but I did want to let you know that I've read and appreciated all of the comments so far.

  Thanks again!

  jp
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  9

  11 new things made illegal in a relationship

  by Amelia Ashton in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was subjected to more than one of these whilst married.

  a partner should be treated as an equal.

  i wonder how that will work out in a jw household?.

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  jp1692

  Funny, they're trying to outlaw narcissistic behavior.

  Good luck with that!
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  48

  Healing & Rebuilding Your Life - Feedback Wanted

  by jp1692 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have been invited to speak at an international cultic studies association workshop this fall.

  i could use your help in focusing on my presentation subject.. these workshops are for former members of any cult or other high-control, authoritarian group, not just jehovah's witnesses.

  last year, i spoke at one of their larger conferences in europe.

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  jp1692

  I have been invited to speak at an International Cultic Studies Association workshop this fall. I could use your help in focusing on my presentation subject.

  These workshops are for former members of any cult or other high-control, authoritarian group, not just Jehovah's Witnesses. Last year, I spoke at one of their larger conferences in Europe. In attendance were former cult members of all kinds, people born or raised in cultic groups, families, mental health professionals, researchers, and educators.

  At a workshop I attended last fall -- and which is similar to the one I will be presenting at this year -- there were many former cult members and their families and friends in the audience, but not too many mental health professionals, researchers, or educators.

  The theme I have chosen for my presentation is: Healing & Rebuilding Your Life.

  My intended audience will range from those that have recently left a cult to those who have some distance but are either still dealing with ex-cult issues or are trying to help someone else that is.

  There are six subjects that I am currently considering for my presentation:

  1. The Five Stages of Grief/loss (Kübler-Ross model)
  2. Examining Our Beliefs: Identifying the false and harmful (dysfunctional) core beliefs which are the root cause of our on-going difficulties after leaving
  3. Psychoeducation - this is closely related to #2 above, but is frankly more technical
  4. Treatments & Interventions - seeking treatments from working with mental health professionals to self-help
  5. Discovering Your Authentic Self - (personal identity)
  6. Dealing With Isolation and Loneliness (shunning)

  As I will only have twenty minutes to present (plus 10 minutes for Q&A), I really need to focus on just one or maybe two at most of the above topics.

  So here is my request: take a look at the above list of six topics and rank in order 1-6 (1 being highest, 6 lowest) which topics you believe would be of most benefit to either yourself or others in our current journey post-JWs. Please indicate how long it's been since you left the religion.

  Feel free to leave any other comments, explanations, suggestions and/or questions.

  Thanks in advance,

  jp
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  21

  You are NOT alone !

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this post is mainly for our new forum visitors and members.

  perhaps even those who are just lurking or visiting here but have not yet signed up.

  maybe you are in the initial stages of researching and finding out the earthshattering and life changing information about the religion that you once held dear and called “the truth”.. it can be a very stressful period of time as you realise that your whole foundation has changed and that the people in your life that you call friends or family may not take kindly to the things you have discovered.

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  jp1692

  Leaving this religion when it's all you've ever known is very stressful and can cause great anxiety.

  It can indeed be difficult to come to terms with the reality that we have been lied to and betrayed by a religion we believed in and people we trusted.

  It is also heartbreaking to find that none of our relationships are sacred. So many of us have lost friends and family -- parents, children, siblings and spouses -- when we left this religion.

  And yet, things can and do get better.

  Indeed, when we leave a dysfunctional, high-control and abusive relationship we open ourselves up for greater opportunities.

  By leaving behind the highly-conditional relationships formed in the Jehovah's Witness religion we can begin to make new and better relationships.

  We will find people that love and appreciate us for WHO we really are, and not WHAT we (pretend to) believe.
  
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  16

  Jehovah`s Witnesses Do Not Have a Clergy Class.

  by smiddy3 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  no , they have the governing body { some would say the popes of the religion }.

  and you do not under any circumstance go against what they say./ .

  they also have branch overseers , district overseers .circuit overseers , and elders in a congregation .. they are all up and above the rank and file of the average ordinary jehovah`s witness and they are looked upon as such by the rank and file member as equivalent to a clergy class.. oh and lets not forget the legal department that has a lot to say in how the jehovah`s witness organization responds to allegations of child sexual abuse around the world.. and when an allegation arises about child sexual abuse the w.t.

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  jp1692

  A key difference is that Catholic priests are highly educated having a minimum of a Bachelor's degree followed up with 2-4 years of seminary studies. Many also have a Master's degree as well; whereas JW elders are almost universally not very well educated.

  The couple of hours or few-days-long workshops that JWs have and call "Elder Schools" are a joke.

  JW elders are completely unqualified for their roles in the congregations. It's a wonder they don't cause more damage than they do, and I'm well aware of the extensive damage they cause.
  
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  16

  Jehovah`s Witnesses Do Not Have a Clergy Class.

  by smiddy3 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  no , they have the governing body { some would say the popes of the religion }.

  and you do not under any circumstance go against what they say./ .

  they also have branch overseers , district overseers .circuit overseers , and elders in a congregation .. they are all up and above the rank and file of the average ordinary jehovah`s witness and they are looked upon as such by the rank and file member as equivalent to a clergy class.. oh and lets not forget the legal department that has a lot to say in how the jehovah`s witness organization responds to allegations of child sexual abuse around the world.. and when an allegation arises about child sexual abuse the w.t.

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  jp1692

  
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  20

  Why our IQ levels are higher than our grandparents'

  by frankiespeakin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vpqilhw9ui.

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  jp1692

  BBW, they’re going back down. The “Flynn Effect” is reversing, or normalizing, to the curve. Time to check your facts and update your data.
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  42

  Liberal vs. Democrat in the U.S.A.

  by OnTheWayOut in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it seems that many believe that a liberal in the usa must be a democrat, pretty much following the party core teachings and some even think it means approving the party history of, during the 19th century, supporting or tolerated slavery and opposing civil rights reforms after the civil war.

  some even insist that a liberal loves anything and everything obama did..

  balderdash!!.

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  jp1692

  OTWO, Nice try. Too bad it’ll likely fall on mostly deaf ears.

  You are attempting to have a nuanced discussion about shades of gray with people that can only see things in black and white, or to be more politically accurate: red and blue.

  As if there are no other colors ...

  Forget reasoned debate; let’s just reduce it all down to emotionally charged-slogans and catch-phrases:

  • less-partisan
  • completely intolerant
  • oxymoron
  • racism
  • racist
  • pretend
  • poisonous past

  Loaded language is the tool of choice of propagandists and yellow journalism. They are effective because they stop us from thinking—unless we know the game. If we know the game, then we can avoid the trap.

  Clear, dispassionate thinking avoids being unduly influenced by such biased words in favor at factual, balanced discourse.

  This is of course much more difficult—which is why most people avoid it—but it is much more productive and always yields better results in the long run.

  It takes incredible courage and personal integrity to respond to these difficult issues with thoughtful and reasoned responses. It’s just so much easier to give knee-jerk responses and degenerate into juvenile name-calling. No critical-thinking involved.

  That being said, I do believe that many of us here on this forum do aspire to more thoughtful, rigorous discourse. But we must acknowledge this singularly uncomfortable fact: we were never taught how to think or how to take a breath and make a thoughtful and reasoned response.

  But that’s no excuse: It’s not too late to learn how to think!

  Now’s the time.