Posts by Dreamerdude

67

My Issue: How To Step Down As A MS Without Getting Noticed

by JW_Rogue in

so that other thread was fun but now i need some help with something.

i was born in the truth most of my family is in.

although they aren't outwardly super spiritual i doubt any of them would ever leave.

Dreamerdude

Rogue, I am late to comment, but i did read the thread with interest last year. I know it is a terrible burden to have the MS responsibility while awake. If you can endure the embarrassment, you could wait for them to remove you the next CO visit.

Since your wife speaks another language, you could insist that you move to the foreign language congregation and throw yourself into learning her language. You can learn a language, show your wife you value her culture, and save your extended family some embarrassment and disappointment.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Cofty, you're right about the GB. The more they get in people's faces, the easier it is to see their foibles and narcissism. Even my wife laughs at Lett's clown faces, she frowns at Herd's open disdain for women, and she scowls at Morris' surly attitude.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Richard, thanks. Now that my eyes are open, it is hard to see how women put up with the abuse and misogyny. Yet they make up 65% of JWs in the US, according to Pew, and the proportion is getting more extreme. At the midweek meeting, which I try to avoid, it is about 80% where I am. It's like a ladies club where the women have no leadership role, and they get dissed constantly.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Listener, thanks. I appreciate many of the topics you have started. I scour them for clues about how to distance myself from the cult, while keeping my wife.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Free mind, thanks for the awesome advice. I completely agree that each individual has a right to their own beliefs and I am determined to be happy and healthy. But I do need to work on my doubts about the cult. It is so deeply ingrained that it is hard to root it out of my authentic personality or even to be aware of it.

I have also learned to let my wife take the lead in being critical, since there is so much available for her to see and hear. Sometimes I need to listen very carefully to pick up on subtle criticism. I really want to encourage her critical thinking skills, but have seen that it can be dangerous to agree too enthusiastically with her criticism, since she can knock herself into cult mode. Poor thing. I am so glad to be locked out of that mode.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Freemind, thanks. I have indeed been able to fade a bit. But I guess that's relative. I was able to step far away from the Service Committe and then the elder body, even getting sympathy for the trauma the 20 year ordeal had caused me. No more public talks at the KH and assemblies. Much less drama and politics. I can sit on the sidelines and snicker to myself about how deluded people need to be to put up with it. I try to limit my loaded language as I learn to speak English. My recruiting is down to 3-5 hours a month, well within the "spiritually weak" range for our congregation. It mostly consists of going on return visits with my wife, where I encourage liberal use of Google and YouTube. At the WT indoctrination session I usually find something humorous I can get people to laugh at, if not I abstain. I get far too much praise for my comments. For the at year I get out of most midweek meetings so I can focus on work.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Darkknight, that is all great advice. I hope things continue to get better for you. I am happy with progress so far, but I wish it was all behind me. Trips away from cult activities are great. I like to use humor to point out the ridiculous side of the org. It's such a farce. I picked that up from Farkel and Billy. It keeps things light.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Hero, sparky, and Mark, thanks for the welcome. I have a lot to learn. I need to listen, without the stifling filter of the WT, although I do like the phrase"multitude of counsellors". I hope to build confidence in my own ability to think, something I was not taught from infancy.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Xanthippe, I do owe Tony Moron the turd a debt of gratitude for talking such foolishness and wiggling his way to the top to spout off to such a large audience. Geoff seemed like such a likable guy, but he showed so little regard for helpless victims. That's what woke my wife briefly, until she was able to rationalize that he is just an imperfect human. These are the people we are expected to be loyal to.

72

Waking up - introduction

by Dreamerdude in

i am a male, born into the jw cult(ure), baptized as a teen, now mid fifties.

most of my life i dreamed of hugging pandas and lions, punctuated at times by nightmares of armageddon or jw drama and politics.

still going through the motions for still-in wife.

Dreamerdude

Freddo, that is a good point about the the need to understand what holds my wife captive. I need to understand that better. I think it's the dream of Paradise. It's such a beautiful carrot. Being told she won't even have freedom there raised her hackles. I need to explore that.