Posts by MuslimWoman

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Thank you every body!

He broke up, and I will try to not go back to him. Extremism in any religion is dangerous and unhealthy.

I'm pretty independant that's what made me refuse to do what he was asking me to do. Islam saved me too because God told us to be smart and educate ourselves, and see that he won't even look at anything because he already found the truth is just crazy.

I told him he was their little b**ch. :(

I got a Bachelor's Degree and I don't need him to do anything weither it is in France or the US.

I'm just shocked how blind he is. He just threw me away like we lived nothing together..

I guess it's life and I thank God for protecting me and make me avoid a life with a controlling and extrem man.

:'(

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Yes you are right.. He disfellowshipped himself. I don't even understadn this word and how he can judge himself as a "non-follower" without being God.. Anyway. We are still talking through emails.. He already deleted our Whatsapp conversation.. This is indeed what they teach jw to do.. Get rid of people that question the organization..

I'm just sad I really loved him, I really wanted to get married seriously adn no to come in the US, there are a lot of other ways to do that.. But yes I gotta be strong and think of my well-being.

I am just disappointed that someone I care about became their little b**ch... He can't even tell me what convinced him to become one! And can't even question them!!! He is just acting like a victim, that people in this forum are just haters that are not strong enough to be a jw help byb Jehovah.

Sad..

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

He helped me a lot and showed a lot of love.. But he is disfellowshipped so I don't know how he can be as a jw.. He helped me when I was homeless in the US (I spent a year as an intern there in SF, and the rent is expensive, something happened with my housing situation) I was homeless for a few months going from house to house and even shelters. And he helped me, I even went to his mom house.. I think he cares but he is so blind and not realistic that he got manipulated by this cult. They are really good I think! They have an official website, videos, texts, their own Bible (that they probably modified..)

But I really care I wanna help him.. But I guess it is not possible..

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Yes I have to find some serious articles that can show him this is an extremism group because I still really care about him.. And no if I wanted to fake it I would have fake becoming a jw but I am a person too honest to do that.. I will try to find some articles but he is not realistic enough to realize those things.

We even spent some times looking at stuff in the Bible about hell (since jw don't believe in hell). It was on front of his eyes that Jesus was talking about hell and fire but he can't see that he is so brainwashed..

I'm just worried and sad.. But I guess if I want to be happy I shouldn't try to repare this relationship..

Thanks for your message.

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Thank you everybody for your message and support..

He just left me by phone because I was telling him to much that he was blackmailing me.. I wasn't asking for a lot. Just to ook up some info about my faith too since he asks me to do something to understand his faith.. I am just really worried about him.. But all you said is true. This sign of being abusive adn how he would have treated me if I was married to him.. And everytime I told him that I will never become a witness but do the bible study and then asked him "you will marry if I do this study" he was evasive and was like I can't promise you I will marry you.. I told him to be honest that he wanted to convert me.. But he wasn't brave and honest enough..

I just felt horrible caus he was asking me to study the Bible, a holy book that I believ in since I am muslim. But I can't do that in order to get married it's just not right! I can't use a holy book to get married.. Yeah I want to try to go in the US but not with a fake marriage. I really wanted to marry him tho.. But he scared me with this passive blackmail..

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Islamists are a little part of the muslim population that is not smart and read the quran in a wrong way.

And yea I do read the comments of everybody and will think of it.

Thank you for your help

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Thanks all,

Yea I didn't really know about this religion so I let myself start this relationship. And I wanted to get married too (I want to live in the US..). So meet him and see that we fell in love was great for us. But yea he is really passively blackmailing me.

And as a muslim I know if you read the holy text you won't be extremist. I am a muslim and read interpretations from people who are fair, smart, and not focused on a patriarchal thought. I was hoping he would be like that but no..

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Hi Flipper!

Thank you for your honest reply!

This is exactly what I say to myself. But it's hard because I really feel that this hurts him too.. We love each other and I pray God to make my boyfriend opens his eyes about this extrem religion..

I will have to make a decision.. But it's complicated also because we are in a long distance relationship.

Thanks again!

75

Confused trying to understand JW GF or soon to be EX

by James87 in

i dont know where to start so why not at the beginning.

i was seeing this girl and we hit it off great chemistry.

it went from a physical to a deeper relationship.

MuslimWoman

Hi,

First I am so sorry about the situation you are in. Because I know it's complicated. I am kind of in the same situation.. My boyfriend is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness who wants to go back to being a jehova's witness. But he is dating me. I am a muslim..

So he wants to get married and tells me he loves me he supports me a lot. But a the same time he is saying that if he goes back to being a jehova's witness he will probably want a jehova's woman. So he is asking me to stidy the bible for 3 months with precise conditions like I have to study once a week, in my home country, and without him. Or he won't marry me.. It's like a passive blackmail: I don't force you to study the bible but if you don't we won't get married and then we will have to break up.

Your girlfriend and my boyfriend are completely lost and are shared between 2 lives: being a jehova's witness and their lover.. It's hard because the Jehova's witness religion is so radical that it's complicated..

I am sorry I can't help you more but you and me we will have to make a choice. Keep fighting for someone we love and pray that they stop being so extremist? Or leave and be hurt? 😔

52

Boyfriend force me to study the bible or no marriage

by MuslimWoman in

my boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (i'm a muslim woman).

he loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if i don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage... as a muslim, i believe the bible is god's word so i look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him.

but the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful.

MuslimWoman

Hi!

My boyfriend, who is a disfellowshipped jehova's witness, asks me to study the bible for 3 months or he won't marry me (I'm a muslim woman). He loves me and really wants to marry me but he is doing a passive blackmailing: if I don't study for 3 months, 1 time per week, in my home country, and without him, there will be no marriage..

As a muslim, I believe the bible is God's word so I look at the bible from time to time and would be happy to study with him. But the fact that he is kind of saying "study the bible or bye bye no marriage" is really hurtful. And it's even more hurtful when I suggest him to study the quran since he asks me to study the bible and he answers a radical NO without even compromising. Besides he is saying that he really wants to marry me but he also wants to go back to being a Jehova's witness and this could make him want a jehova's witness woman and leave me..

So I need your help to guide me and tell me if this condition is in the bible in order to get married. Should I be submissive and study the bible in order to get married while he doesn't even want to look up some info about my religion? Or keep trying to convince him to compromise a little bit and look at some info about my religion which is Islam?

Thank you very much for your time!