1st grade classic:
Going down the highway
Doing 94,
____(name of your choice) let a big one
And blew us out the door.
The wheels couldn't stand it
The engine fell apart.
All because of ___
Supersonic fart.
TresHappy
JoinedPosts by TresHappy
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Do you remember any poems from school?
by JH indo you remember any poems you learned by heart at school?
well, go on, recite it.... i remember this very short one:.
"a ball of fur, inhabited by purr" now that is the shortest poem i ever heard.
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What Would A Jehovah's Witness Romance Novel Be Like?
by minimus ini was reading in the religion page of the newspaper today that the mormons are enjoying romance novels in which descriptions of the characters' sex lives are limited to little more the first kiss--- that could happen after they are engaged to be married........any ideas of what a jw romance novel might be like?
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TresHappy
Hilary’s parents had always been overprotective. However, at age 19, she knew that dating David would be the biggest challenge of her young life. Soon after the lecture from hell, the phone rang. It was him…she explained to David she had just had the lecture of her life from her parents and Dad was concerned about the two of them dating. “Aren’t all Jehovah’s Witness parents like that Hilary?” said David. “ It’s sort of expected. Dating is a 4-letter word to most Jehovah’s Witnesses and especially overprotective parents. I am sure your father is going to check me out in my previous congregation…” Hilary asked, “How do you feel about all this David?” David replied “I say go for it, I have always been and good and faithful servant to Jehovah. I’ve got nothing to hide.” David then said to her “Hilary, I am crazy about you. I want to get to know you, and you can’t do that going out in service. To some extent, yes, but Hilary, you know what I mean.” Hilary felt so much better after hearing his voice and his reassurance. “But we kissed in the Kingdom Hall parking lot, what if someone had seen us?” David tried to calm her. “So what I kissed you, you mean I can’t kiss you? I’ve wanted to do that since the first time I laid eyes on you at the convention.” Hilary then nervously tucked her hair behind her ear and whispered “me too” into the receiver. “Hilary, I am so looking forward to seeing you this weekend. I’d swim through a moat of sharks to take you out.” Hilary laughed. That moat of sharks may be easier to navigate than her father.
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Jesika & pr_capone's wedding plans -- Friday, July 11, 2003 at 7:00 p.m.
by cruzanheart inwe changed the wedding from saturday in order to give the newlyweds a chance to spend the weekend relaxing and getting settled as an official couple.
also, by having it friday night there is a chance, a possibility, that big tex will be able to get the night off so he can give the bride away (*sniffle*).
and there is also a chance, a possibility, that our beloved district overbeer will perform the wedding.
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TresHappy
Cruzan, this wedding sounds like a blast! I haven't been this excited about a wedding since my own (just around the corner - July 14) in 1998. It sounds like it will be a small, intimate and beautiful affair! Btw, what is the dress code, if any?
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Jesika & pr_capone's wedding plans -- Friday, July 11, 2003 at 7:00 p.m.
by cruzanheart inwe changed the wedding from saturday in order to give the newlyweds a chance to spend the weekend relaxing and getting settled as an official couple.
also, by having it friday night there is a chance, a possibility, that big tex will be able to get the night off so he can give the bride away (*sniffle*).
and there is also a chance, a possibility, that our beloved district overbeer will perform the wedding.
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TresHappy
Lyin Eyes, what a wonderful offer to the couple! Shreveport's only 4 or 5 hours from here (I think)...that might work out perfectly for the newlyweds.
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162
What Would A Jehovah's Witness Romance Novel Be Like?
by minimus ini was reading in the religion page of the newspaper today that the mormons are enjoying romance novels in which descriptions of the characters' sex lives are limited to little more the first kiss--- that could happen after they are engaged to be married........any ideas of what a jw romance novel might be like?
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TresHappy
Hilary went into her closet and looked through her wardrobe. Thumbing through the “pioneer haute moderne” section, she lamented “My God, that’s all he’s seen me in, these skirts and dresses…UGH! I’ve got to have something to knock his socks off.” After pulling out several outfits and trying them on, she was still not satisfied. “I have a date with my dream guy and I don’t have a damn thing to wear”, she mumbled, and then looking out of the door of her bedroom to make sure her father didn’t happen to walk by and hear something. She had yet to tell her dad she was going out on a group date with David. Dad was in his study reading his Watchtower for the upcoming Sunday meeting. Dad always dutifully highlighted his study (with his trusty Avery Ever-Bold Hi-liter), and then put it away in his new brief case he got for an anniversary present from his wife. Hilary wandered off again “Why did Mom buy him that tacky brief case, and then for an anniversary present?” But Hilary knew her Dad loved it, and since they got a computer, Dad ordered nearly every service supply from www.ministryideaz.com.
Hilary knew she’d have to tell her Mom and Dad sooner or later. Hilary procrastinated at everything. She thought she might tell him after their first date, but she knew that would be like having a blood drive at the District Convention, not really a good idea. Mom came out of the kitchen and Hilary approached her mother. “Mom, I need to tell you something…you know I’ve been sort of seeing David out in service the last few weeks and we’ve really hit it off..He’s asked me out on a group date for this weekend.” Mom’s eyes widened and she said “Well I am not surprised, I’ve heard from other sisters about how you two have been gazing at each other in service. Your father sort of knew this was coming, and he’s already talked to me about it…” “He’s highly concerned about you and wants to make sure you’re not taking advantage of and treated with respect.” Hilary thought surely her mom would be pulling her hair out by now (my baby…dating, she knew that’s what her mom was thinking.) Before Hilary could defend David, Dad walked out of the study and said, “Well, what are you two talking about?” Dad was always asking about the conversations between the two of them. “Dad”, Hilary coughed and stammered through her sentence “David has asked me out on a group date for this weekend…. and I’ve accepted his invitation.” Her dad gave her that “raised eyebrow” look and said, “Well Hilary, you seem to really like David and visa/versa. And you’re 19, you’re old enough to be dating, but are you old enough to realize that dating is a very serious step in Jehovah’s organization?” “Are you prepared for the responsibility that comes with seriously considering David as your future husband? Your mother and I aren’t going to stop from you seeing David, but we’re going to make sure you’re treated with respect and I expect to meet that boy when he comes to get you this weekend. And I expect your dates will be chaperoned by some other brothers or sisters?” Hilary gulped and said “Dad, it’s a group date with David and his brother/girlfriend.” We’re going out to eat and then see a movie, you know normal date stuff.” Dad was not particularly impressed. “Why can’t you go out with a fine group of Witnesses from our congregation? There’s always a nice group of brothers and sisters going out to dinner after the Sunday meeting. Or perhaps you and David could go to that sister’s house whose always having people over for dinner and then they study the Watchtower together.” Hilary said “Dad, I’ve been seeing David in a group for a couple of weeks now, we’ve been going out in service together, and actually, we have found some interested ones and David may even start a Bible study with a young guy. Dad, you know I like David very much and I want to get to know him better…I am aware of the seriousness of dating and it’s potential consequences…” Mom and Dad then both gave her that look. Hilary’s eyes welled up with tears, as she knew that dating David from the start was almost an exercise in futility. Then Dad finally chimed in his last comment “Hilary you’re an adult. You’re a baptized sister of Jehovah. You’re a pioneer in Jehovah’s service. I say this to you as a sister and as a father, Jehovah and his organization want the best for you…and your mother and I want you to have a wonderful time in your youth and your teenage years are almost behind you.” Mom said only one thing “Just be careful Hilary, you know some of those brothers, they like that world traveling, they’ve got those Russian hands and Roman fingers.” She figured after all of this lecture, this was a yes to her dating David…sort of.
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Les vacances!
by TresHappy ini'll be on vacation for 2 weeks starting friday, july 11. i have no immediate plans to do anything unless i feel the notion to do so.
i won't be posting as i am putting my brain on a shelf because i refuse to think until monday, july 28. .
my two year anniversary with the board is tomorrow!
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TresHappy
Happyout - I'll do some more before vacation...but the ending - my goodness I haven't had them out on their first date yet...this is a looooooooong courtship...
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Jesika & pr_capone's wedding plans -- Friday, July 11, 2003 at 7:00 p.m.
by cruzanheart inwe changed the wedding from saturday in order to give the newlyweds a chance to spend the weekend relaxing and getting settled as an official couple.
also, by having it friday night there is a chance, a possibility, that big tex will be able to get the night off so he can give the bride away (*sniffle*).
and there is also a chance, a possibility, that our beloved district overbeer will perform the wedding.
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TresHappy
Unless you want the bride and groom to resemble hangman figures, I suggest NOT using me. I had a wonderful Mexican wedding cake from a bakery in Arlington when I got married. Cost less than $100.00!
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Les vacances!
by TresHappy ini'll be on vacation for 2 weeks starting friday, july 11. i have no immediate plans to do anything unless i feel the notion to do so.
i won't be posting as i am putting my brain on a shelf because i refuse to think until monday, july 28. .
my two year anniversary with the board is tomorrow!
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TresHappy
I'll be on vacation for 2 weeks starting Friday, July 11. I have no immediate plans to do anything unless I feel the notion to do so. I won't be posting as I am putting my brain on a shelf because I refuse to think until Monday, July 28.
My two year anniversary with the board is tomorrow!
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50
Jesika & pr_capone's wedding plans -- Friday, July 11, 2003 at 7:00 p.m.
by cruzanheart inwe changed the wedding from saturday in order to give the newlyweds a chance to spend the weekend relaxing and getting settled as an official couple.
also, by having it friday night there is a chance, a possibility, that big tex will be able to get the night off so he can give the bride away (*sniffle*).
and there is also a chance, a possibility, that our beloved district overbeer will perform the wedding.
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TresHappy
Cruzan - will there be a cool wedding cake?
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Jesika & pr_capone's wedding plans -- Friday, July 11, 2003 at 7:00 p.m.
by cruzanheart inwe changed the wedding from saturday in order to give the newlyweds a chance to spend the weekend relaxing and getting settled as an official couple.
also, by having it friday night there is a chance, a possibility, that big tex will be able to get the night off so he can give the bride away (*sniffle*).
and there is also a chance, a possibility, that our beloved district overbeer will perform the wedding.
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TresHappy
Cruzan - are you needing help with the nuptials? I am off on Friday and can help if necessary.
Perhaps I could be in charge of telling someone where to put the squeaky, wobbly rented white chairs in some sort of order.
Perhaps I could wave and flap my hands like a parking attendant at the DC and show people where to park their cars.
Perhaps I can just be there and cry on cue!