gingerbread

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Posts by gingerbread

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  19

  When will you NOT go anymore ?

  by Phizzy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i ask this of all who know ttatt and yet still attend, i am interested, when will you judge it is the right time not to go to meetings anymore ?.

  a big part of me wants to say ".

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  gingerbread

  Being raised as a JW caused me (and I think a lot of other folks here) to make decisions about life and act on those decisions because of external pressure. This external pressure becomes internalized and produces guilt. I've been fading (on the outside) for about a year. And during the process of realization (TTATT) I've made a concerted effort to extract the guilt and deflect the pressure.

  JW thinking is "group think" - you must think like me, act like me, feel like me. We would patronize any person, group or organization that wasn't like "us".

  Some who have left the WT continue to think like a JW.

  I've chosen my own path. I will exit fully in my own way, in my own time.
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  40

  Going to the meeting tonight ARGH!!!! So wanna end this pain NOW!

  by Julia Orwell in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm only going to the meeting because of my husband!

  i was 'in' solo for years while living with my unbelieving family and i know how it feels to be the only one in your house going to the meeting.

  i also respect my husband's decision, and know what it's like to have family try to tear down your beliefs.

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  gingerbread

  Hang in there Julia! Remember that the WT and it's local congregation managers love to get in the middle of marriages. Don't give them the power. Bide your time. Be patient. Don't do anything rash. Perhaps you could begin to plan an outing for this Sunday or a weekend trip. Then you and your husband can spend time together instead of with the "friends" at the hall. It's a very positive way solidify your marriage and gives the opportunity to just be a couple & to talk honestly.
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  18

  Blondie's Comments You Will Not Hear at the 03-10-2013 WT Study (DISTANCE)

  by blondie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  distance from jehovah (not jesus).

  comments.

  comments.

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  gingerbread

  When I read paragraph 8, I wanted to reach in and throttle that spoiled brat! The WT sets up as a fine example some kid (fictitious or not) who trashes his father in front of millions of readers ( and any who didn't read the article will hear this "fine experience" from the platform for years to come ). He complains that his dad wasn't a good example to the congregation - probably not high enough on the theocratic ladder for the son. By extention - if this boy is real - the WT is trashing the dad.... probably wasn't sharing the wealth to support "theocratic" projects.
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  53

  Hello

  by newdawnfades in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am a long time lurker who has finally decided to post.

  i am still in along with my wife, kids and extended family.

  i am in my 40s and was raised in the org.

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  gingerbread

  This step takes courage! You'll find great advice and links here. Remember: you will lose any arguments with fully entrenched witnesses - friends, elders & family. Be patient. Be careful.

  I look forward to following your story...
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  51

  My chat with an Elder about the UN thing! Help!

  by awakening in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well it was a very long discussion.

  the elder knew nothing about the scandal, but he stated that he had no issue with it since when the case was brought to light, the society acted immediately to right their course.

  in fact he thought it was a sign that that the organisation was indeed the "truth".

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  gingerbread

  It may help you to understand his thought process by reading a bit about "confirmation bias" - Wikipedia has a good overview.

  Those of us who spent a number of years in or were raised as a JW use this thought filter all of the time.
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  7

  Question about future enthusiasm of the congregations.

  by Fading Begins in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was the store manager of a large furniture store - part of a national chain.

  we had large sales once month, and giganic four day sale every quarter with a large amount of print and tv advertising.

  for these quarterly sales we would have conference calls every morning with our directors to report our numbers, contests for the salespeople, and target goals for each salesperson, individual store, and the national district.

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  gingerbread

  Fading Begins - I come from a large family that is well known in the area - four generations. I have to be very careful during this fading process! My folks - being up in years - are much like your Mom. They have been in for so long that meetings and service are just another part of life. And that's fine with me. I don't want to add any stress to their lives by trashing the org every chance I get. I do however - and they do listen - bring up facts about the history of the org and of our beliefs. They say the "love of the greater number" is cooling off right within "our religion" and sight the aggressiveness of "the brothers" just finding seats at an assembly or convention as an example.

  My Dad has a wicked sense of humor! We've discussed the Candace Conti lawsuit and he hopes she wins in the end. I think they've stopped contributing the the "world wide work" since the initial verdict was announced. He says "that's really money that pays the lawyers and pays off victims of abuse to keep them from going public !!!"
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  7

  Question about future enthusiasm of the congregations.

  by Fading Begins in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was the store manager of a large furniture store - part of a national chain.

  we had large sales once month, and giganic four day sale every quarter with a large amount of print and tv advertising.

  for these quarterly sales we would have conference calls every morning with our directors to report our numbers, contests for the salespeople, and target goals for each salesperson, individual store, and the national district.

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  gingerbread

  Remember when we used to lament how the people at the doors had become so apathetic to the message? Apathy has infected the congregation and I think it's a result of those of us who were raised in or our kids who were born in realizing that the message has become hollow... and the lifestyle we promote is shortsighted and unrealistic. Recognize too that the org has encouraged congregation members to be judgemental about each other - remember last years convention demo with young people watching tv and one storms off stage telling everyone how the program is stumbling her!

  My parents tell me (who are still quite active) that the "truth" just isn't the same anymore....
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  28

  For those still "in"... is it just me?

  by leaving_quietly in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm still "in" and i've noticed an odd trend recently.

  conversations with jws seem to be more jw-ish than ever!

  in normal conversation, i'll hear: "these watchtowers are just wonderful!

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  gingerbread

  These comments and endless variations of them have been spoken in the WT org from it's beginning. You've started to pay attention!

  It's all about appearances. If you speak the lingo, it shows others that you're part of the JW club.

  Gorbatchov is spot on. Jehovah's Witnesses are no longer students of the Bible or a religious movement exposing the "truth." We've become another worldwide mega-church who's purpose is to recruit others into the JW lifestyle.
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  19

  She bashed me with the Watchtower then UNFRIENDED me!

  by Julia Orwell in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  all i've done is posted scriptures on my facebook page for discussion.

  this uber-jw 'friend' has engaged me in debate, each time cutting and pasting a whole bunch of wt quotes on whatever our topic is, and i've responded with scriptures and she could only answer with another wt quote, and now today i see she's unfriended me!

  all her comments are gone too.

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  gingerbread

  You'll find personal happiness if you choose to surround yourself with shiny happy people.

  We are trained to be judgemental, dogmatic and ultimately unhappy. This causes us to cling to the promises of the WT and to the people in the little kingdom hall "lifeboat."
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  81

  More connect-the-dots madness...

  by cedars in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  that's right, a knife and a baby in close proximity.... .

  http://www.jw.org/assets/m/ijw13fr/502013178/ijw13fr_id-502013178_e/502013178_e_cnt_1.pdf.

  anything goes, so long as you're proving how "wise" king solomon was.. .

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  gingerbread

  In the attached comment for "family activity" is to act this event out. Family worship night...conducted by dad with a butcher knife.