Posts by gingerbread

34

Is the grass greener on the other side?

by What Now? in

hi all.... so my mom phoned me up this morning and said she needed to talk to me about something.

she asked me whether or not our (worldly) family thought that my husband and i were witnesses anymore.

one, someone in my family said to her, "i didn't know you guys wear short dresses like that" - commenting on a slightly above the knee dress i had worn to a family event.

gingerbread

Your Mom is probably worried that you might put yourself in the position of getting disfellowshipped. She doesn't want that to happen - she will be forced by WT policy to cease communication. It's my guess that she isn't afraid of losing you to "the world." Your Mom is afraid of being cut off from you and her grandchild because of others in the congregation. This happens to witness families every day. It's a real fear.

Maybe you should assure her that you love her. Take time to visit with her - more often now than you have in the past. Telling her that you guys are just taking a little "break" from the hall might calm her concerns.

Fade smart!

38

I'm writing a DA letter...need advise

by nolongerconfused in

jw
friends

hello, so i have decided to da myself and will write a da letter to the body of elders.... do you have any ideas of what i can include in this letter or samples?...

i really want to make a huge impact with this letter.. i appreciate your help everyone....

gingerbread

You will not win. You won't prove anything.

Just stop playing the game - in your heart and your mind....and in your behavior. Allow yourself to just be a good person. That's true freedom.

30

My ex JW sister is an APOLOGIST!!!!!

by joyfulfader in

i have had a few conversations with my sister who left the org several years ago and has been dating a non jw for several years now.

she celebrates the holidays and everything.

so the other day i brought up some of the things i have learned since leaving.

gingerbread

joyfulfader - It's a good idea to let well enough alone for the time being. Remind yourself of how much the "mother" organization encourages divisive behavior. In the "truth" we were (in our minds) separate from the world. Exemplary families are "united" in their service (as stewards). The culture supports shunning of those that aren't fully vested - even within families. Perhaps your sister believes that "the truth" is the only right way to live. Do you feel she should have been judicially disciplined? Being patient with your sister (and with your own transition) may be the positive approach to this difficult situation.

30

My ex JW sister is an APOLOGIST!!!!!

by joyfulfader in

i have had a few conversations with my sister who left the org several years ago and has been dating a non jw for several years now.

she celebrates the holidays and everything.

so the other day i brought up some of the things i have learned since leaving.

gingerbread

Leaving is a process. It takes time, sometimes years, to make the final cut. The progress is incremental. In my observation, a person who's involvement as a jw is only about meeting attendence, service time, giving talks, being around family, etc. can often stay "out" for some time and later jump right back in without blinking an eye. And these folks are always welcomed back with arms wide open.

8

The Making Of A Jehovah's Witness

by Bangalore in

jw
friends

the making of a jehovah's witness.. .

by victor escalante.

http://www.jwfiles.com/wt_professional_look_at_jws/making_jw.htm.

gingerbread

"In all fairness those were kinder and gentler time and the people that I came in contact were for the most part sincere Christians. They were followers of followers and they did not know the long term consequences of their choice in religion."

How true! When my parents decided to become part of "the truth", they did it for very good reasons. It was the first time anyone took the time to sit and talk about the bible. They found "answers" to many of their questions. I know the resurrection hope appealed to them. And, as socially aware people they found the apparent peace, love, harmony between people of all nationalities, races, economic position and backgrounds to be a "dream come true" - as young folks in the late 1960's. We were a stable and honest family. They (thankfully!) chose to walk to a different drummer than the other "hook, line and sinker" witnesses. They planned their retirement. Encouraged each of the kids individually to pursue education - in order to be independent, happy adults.

We were some of the few fortunate kids - with balanced parents. Unfortunately this is rarely the case amoung JW kids I grew up with. It can be hard to decide to act on ones beliefs - to be honest with yourself. Everyone has different circumstances. Leaving (or fading in my case) takes courage and restraint!

10

First Recorded "Conscious Class" Talk in the Kingdom Hall

by raymond frantz in

the governing body is not all powerful and all present ,we are not totally powerless .use your talks to promote christian freedom and tear down their propaganda .use material from publications that promote christian freedom and scriptures that they willingly avoid .use your talks to awake your brothers .

the following talk uses non of the usual watchtower propaganda and uses scriptures the governing body chooses to avoid .. whether you are an elder ,a ministerial servant ,or just a publisher use your items and your talks at the meeting to awake your brothers and sisters .this talk was given few days ago at the thursday meeting ,based on proverbs 3:5.sorry for the accent ,english is not my mother language.. talk at the kingdom hall.

gingerbread

Bravo !!!

17

I NEED HELP!

by nolongerconfused in

jw
friends

guys, i have faded about a 1 month ago...now 1 elder, who i consider a friend as a person and like a father is texting me.... i don't hate the guy, i consider him my friend even though i don't believe what he believes...he's telling me he hasnt seen me at the meetings and he's worried...he asked me if i could go in service with him this weekend...i have not responded, i dont know what to say since i don't want to go through no judicial committee or something like that...nobody there knows i know ttabtt...any suggestions on how i should respond?.

thanks!.

gingerbread

If you are into your fade for a month now, you're just beginning.

Ask yourself: Do I want to go through intense question and answer sessions with the elder(s)?. Do I have friends and family that are still active and I don't want to risk having them being told not the associate with me? Would it be better to fade quietly rather than go cold turkey? Should I just miss a few and make a few meetings for the next few months? Should I just turn in an hour or two of service time for the next few months? Would this be best approach for the time being?

If you just "disappear" you will set off all the alarms! Most elders (and family & friends) will assume the worst, ask questions to get to the root of "your problem" and will either attempt to "readjust" your thinking or mark you as questionalble, bad association and/or dangerous to the congregation.

Fade smart!

37

Do's and Dont's on debating JWs online

by Emery in

jw
friends

recently i have seen an increase number of former members trying to argue ttatt with jws on youtube, news articles, facebook and public forums.

for the most part, i do not see a lot of vicious or hostile debates when former members are trying to show ttatt, but i have seen some arguments and approaches turn out very ugly, to the point of many face palms.. i remember there were several instances that completely turned me off towards ttatt as a believer because "apostates" would be entirely reprehensible and would fit the bill of what the society termed "mentally diseased".

i cannot fault ones here who have gone on a similar rampage now that i understand how people lose everything and everyone they love.

gingerbread

The thinking process that is developed as a JW encourages that we are right about our beliefs - biblical & world history, prophecy, science, biblical applications, the universe, the future, etc... And, we had an "it's us against them" judgemental attitude. There are former JW's that have been treated very badly in their congregations and by their family & former friends. Their comments express the anger. And, unfortunatly I think, all too often they become bitter people who are determined to show how they are now right. Sure, we all began to question our beliefs - for different reasons. Some have reacted in anger, argued their points and were disfellowshipped or chose to disassociated themselves. My observation - in the US at least - is that considerable numbers are still "in" but quietly exiting - especially folks between the ages of 20 and 40.

It's a big mental step to just look at this forum. I lurked for some time before becoming a member. If JW.net was full of rage and anger, I would have never returned. Fortunately I found encouragement and practical advice.

51

Orangeburg Assembly Hall - designed to be sold as a future supermarket?

by cedars in

jw
friends

i've just been watching a youtube video that reveals the new assembly hall in orangeburg, sc.. two things struck me when watching it.... firstly, everything is attributed to jehovah, right down to deciding the location where the hall is to be built.

"we examined over 300 properties," said one interviewee, "we were reminded that jehovah knew where the site was, we just had to keep looking and show him that we were persistent.

" other workers interviewed throughout the video attribute everything to god, as though it is impossible to build anything without divine direction.. here is the video.... .

gingerbread

Cedars and OnTheWayOut - you're spot on.

I've been to this site in it's early stages. I would describe it at a "generic" complex with full retail or corporate potential. As I've mentioned in other posts, the WT Society is in this for the long term and the real estate / building arm has a lot of internal power.

Emery - You're right about counting time. Pioneers fill the RBC's because of the massive amount of hours they can claim during construction and renovation projects (they can also count time spent at funerals, hospital visits, etc...).

As Mark Twain is reported to have said "Buy land. They ain't makin' anymore of it!"

37

Is there a link between peaks in newbies and new light flashes?

by likeabird in

jw
friends

i hope you are all well and enjoying your saturday!.

it's really great seeing so many newbies, congratulations to each and everyone of you.

and welcome.. in any case, my question is the one i put in the title :.

gingerbread

The recent events that flipper refers to encouraged me to become a member. I've been regularly lurking - and researching - for almost two years. Being "raised in the truth" and now middle aged with a lot of family active, this is a big step! I'm currently "in" physically - still attending the Sunday meetings and fading discreetly.

As a side note, it was the encouragement and compassion that is expressed on this forum for folks like me - from former active publishers - that kept me coming back to this site. It's not the negative, judgemental, sophomoric expressions of some posters.

If I want to hear that everyday, I'd remain a Jehovah's Witness....