LongHairGal ....really I totally agree with you, but ur circumstances, family structure, not only length of time as a JW but also to the degree one was involved, your character, what makes you you are all different with everyone else except the one thing we do have in commen is that were on this post with pseudo names...why is it we don't shout out from on top of this site relaying our real names? MY reason is this sight allows me to express myself of the issues that can not only be heard here but allows us to associate with each other 'harddriven' 'tattoed' 'battered' 'thrownout' 'abandoned' 'lied to' some of us left with an emptiness that this sight is the only place where we find relief whether its extreme or not, and its the 'truth' for us....................................................................................my mother doesn't have long and I don't want too have to be stand offish or to stand in a line of JWs relaying there condolences avoiding to touch the hands of the 'devil'. what a son of a bitch this is....keynumber
keynumber
JoinedPosts by keynumber
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9
D'Fd coming to the aid of a JW in good standing
by keynumber inno he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's.
drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only i quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, getting to what i want to say.. we were moving and in the move i found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened.
i had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so i won't have to depend on jw's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get jw's.. thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #.
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9
D'Fd coming to the aid of a JW in good standing
by keynumber inno he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's.
drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only i quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, getting to what i want to say.. we were moving and in the move i found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened.
i had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so i won't have to depend on jw's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get jw's.. thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #.
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keynumber
I've been a seasonal worker for a university, doing maintenance work on student dorms when they leave for
for the summer...I ve done this for 3 years except last year...it just so happens that the facilities engineer is an elder and my direct supervisor is also one...I know I rubbed him the wrong way...city easterners and westerners are 2 different breeds...of course being df'd just adds to it making it "open season' for df'd ones not to mention being a poor minority doesn't help, and believe me I don't ride this 'band wagon" loosly,my awareness is very intune with this and by far proven I love all and not inbreed with this characteristic.
Wasn't called last year 2014 because as this supervisor said "I talk to much". well we go to the same congregation my wife being in good standing. My wife relays to me about this from an elder who told her this comment was made by this brother to him...interestingly he brought up this in the ministry...hmmm... the real motive, reason is quite obvious...the paradox of it is there are individuals as me working there that are doing drugs & robbing them blind and no I'm not a 'snitch', not a good working policy. Actually it really hurt me...it showed his true character.
Well here's the 'catcher', the formen I'm assigned to hates Jehovahs Witnesses and to no small degree. we've spoken alot, ive explained what being df'd is,,boy did I feed the fire..and I got to admit he introduced me to alot of new knowledge and not necessarily against JWs but eye opening bible research..it does exist from non-jws contrary of what many are led to believe.
I was called this year to work and go to find out that my direct forman went directly to HR and explained to them why the reason they didn't call me..he told them because I am 'kicked' out of 'their' religion and that this talking reason was just an excuse...
I was reinstated, please lets not go there at this time...and some say thank god you were hired back and to think it took this hater of jws to talk for me
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41
My Window Cleaner
by happy@last inmy window cleaner is a jw and as i am always working when he comes to my house i haven't seen him or spoken to him in years.
the other day i was in my local town and went into a cafe for some lunch.
who is sitting there but my window cleaner and his wife.
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keynumber
I was df'd at the time...working for a construction company....and there happened to be a JW working with all of us..Of course he never crossed my path, 'oh well". he never sat with any of the crew, he ate alone reading his 'magazines...he had a nice haircut, looked not like the general look of construction workers. stood out....well some time later he was talking and sitting with one of the 'guys'....I just in conversation, him of course not knowing my df'd position as an xjw asked "see you 2 are pretty chumy, what gives?" well the guy told me he really can't stand him. he said "the other day this guy knocked on my door and started to preach to me, told him to get off my property." the worker mentioned " he's such a snot, acts one way at work and a chatter box at the door, and he (the jw)apologised the for how he was." now he sits with all us "godless heathens".
I can respect to some degree how he ports himself, but I'm sure after that incident he learned something about opening doors.
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89
the other side of my story and why im going back
by deservingone26 inthere are two parts to this topic you can read one or the other or both if you want, i just figured i post this for differents ones who might being going thru what i am going thru i tried to write this as quick as possible so everything i am posting here is not to offend anyone i know everyone has the own opinions on different things so you can disagree or agree, but this is where i stand.
sorry for any spelling errors or grammar issues up front.
my story .
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keynumber
we have alot of similaraties that I relate too. this is my 3rd stint being df'd. In other posts I relate alot of my life and experienced..I was in bethel 4yrs.
I also got into the drug scene heavily...and it wasn't weed or alcohol only. I am an addict today, have been serious recovery for 2 years. In the early period of my addiction I got in different programs of recovery...and during that period in the beginning I never told my facilitators and therapist just how involved I was with this organisation. Why? Because I didn't want to let them know the reality of being one of jw's, the guilt put on me for not living up to my expectations, and telling them all that goes on with areas of association, education etc and the hidden restrictions, the complete ostracism from all your friends, family.
Once I had a break-down on the road and actually couldn't think of anyone to call for help and I did't have AAA, damit...And if you did call someone, maybe a brother the first thing they'll ask is if you know anyone else that can help you. and if they do their continence show a reluctance. I did get help for a jw friend and today i consider him my best friend even thouth we dont tale to each other
Finally I spoke to facilitor and therepist phd. and told them everrything..What a weight off me... I do take meds to balance me and am very involved with the MATRIX RECOVERY PROGRAM, I feel one of the best. All what happened took a pschology toll on me.
and if it wasnt for my truthfullnes I wouldn't have the real help, go seek help, it won,t hurt it will help in more ways then one..
PRACTICEING RECOVERY METHODS,
KEYNUMBER
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46
War over preparing for WT study
by cookiemaster ini know that title sounds weird but so is this situation.
with the following information i'm about to desconspire myself a little bit, but i don't really care since i will simply deny it if any of my elders are lurking here.
anyway the situation is the following.
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keynumber
just tell the brother you can't have the study at your on home anymore...If he asks why, dignify he and yourself and just say its a personal family circumstance.
The thing you better realize is if this 'unbalanced fanatic' moves on to 'greater responsibility' to say an elder, can you then imagine anyone sitting in HIS COMITTEE'? YOU HAVE A HANGMAN HERE. So if you tend to stay you have to play the game, don't show him your hand...This can be difficult if you have a personality that "will say it as it is". BE CAUTIOUS AS A SERPENT AND INNOCENT AS A DOVE.
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keynumber
Of course being raised as one of JW's, it was discouraged or for that matter forbiddened in the small towns all associated with one kingdom hall to be involved in the extra-curricular activities 'sports', from little league to highschool.
My best friend was non-jw. He was a year ahead of me in H/S. He encouraged me to join wrestling and so I did...of course with-out telling my parents, so for a period I was able to hide it. It was very exciting, so much for the recreation provided at get-togethors. I became very good to the point of getting front headlines on our local-yokal paper. At little time before when my mother found out she said the only way I could, was to continue going to the meetings. My father not a believer said it was ok as long as I continued taking care of our animals 'horses,cows,chickens etc. In time I quit going to the hall because the matches were on thursday night. I then quit altogether going and contrary as to what some jws may think, no I didnt gett involved with alcohol, drugs or some craziness that the witnesses would hear about and say "ya we knew he was going that way, see what happens when you leave the 'truth'"
By the end of my junior year I was offered a scholarship to a local college...My senior year I didn't join the team...I came back as one of jws, now it was the other way around...now I was not very popular with the school...now I was a considered a fanatic.. lost my scholarship..
After graduation I applied to bethel, accepted and was there four years...If ever today I could point at the most impressionable part of my life, molded me to the person I am today....
We all sometimes ponder of the what if's in life...we can't change some things....but another aspect that makes me wish I has finished my education...today I struggle since I left bethel with no solid skills...It seems it would of been better not going to B. and concentrate on my education and still associate with the organisation and have a solid upper income. then after I've done this I could be an elder and encourage full time service or bethel discourageing any involvement in the 'world'.
sports raised my self-esteem, my worth instead of settling for a type of life lowered it. As long as I was in bethel I was fine, after leaving, facing the real world, I realized that weather joining sports or being on the school chess team there is nothing wrong with it...Restricting these can cause old maids, mental illness and in the end your to old to change the circumstances.
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9
D'Fd coming to the aid of a JW in good standing
by keynumber inno he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's.
drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only i quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, getting to what i want to say.. we were moving and in the move i found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened.
i had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so i won't have to depend on jw's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get jw's.. thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #.
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keynumber
My wife only attended the first day of the 2 day assembly with our daughter. I'm df'd but don't want to bust their "bubble". I do love her and she really loves the organisation as the girls do. Anyway in this circumstance it keeps the peace and positive longevity,. I respect everyones descision.
Well she bought this beautiful dress, got her hair dyed and we went to Frys and got a cold roast beef hogie and a drink to take w/her to the function, and going with our daughter and her husband, she really looked forward to this...the early the next morning got a call, the baby was very sick, so those plans fell through...Told her to call one of the friends "I have no doubt you'll find a ride"...she didn't want to bother anyone, can you believe this.
It brought to memory how things have changed in this organisation...I remember a time long ago in the beginning of my time in the ORG...we grew up in a congregation of 15 publishers, only sisters, ultimately the Society sent 2 brothers to help...it grew to about 40+- publishers and allot of us...We were very close, as a youth we were very active with kids our age and alot of "get-togethors" , Even burying literature so if the ungodly heathens took what we had away from us we would...55yrs later its under a new-home tract division...We traveled to our assembly to El Paso, Armarillo, Los Angeles, and Phoenix in car caravans, we all stayed at the same motel, and worked in the same departments... We were very togethor.
Now today you can see a full parking lot and not many in attendance because everyone drives on there own car. Many of those in the hall, you or them have never eaten at each others home... even the elder visits...stressing not the isolating ourself, you don't even know where they live or the work they do...Sometimes you'll see them at a mall etc. and talk with each other as if you've know them forever and in reality learn more of them in the grocery aisle. I remember traveling or those traveling would need a place to stay and all you had to say your one of JWs. Of course thats not possible today.
My wife loves the congregation so much and at the same time is reluctant to ask for a ride...Many today will stop and think what one will have to sacrifice and is it worth it....to far, going out of my way, I don't get allong and other reasons that prevent one from really expressing love for one another.They'll sooner go pick and go out of there way to pick up a study.... But we say we love ouR brothers... when we really only ....................
LOVE FROM A DISTANCE
she never got a ride or call back...I'm the one that tried to make the arrangements for her.
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9
D'Fd coming to the aid of a JW in good standing
by keynumber inno he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's.
drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only i quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, getting to what i want to say.. we were moving and in the move i found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened.
i had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so i won't have to depend on jw's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get jw's.. thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #.
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keynumber
Its a ashamed that those that pride themselves being one of JWs and listening to all the character building info. are at a total loss on how to conduct themselves especially making it a fine line where at one hand they'd help anyone but have to stall to think about helping the "df'd sister making efforts to get reinstated and has a flat tire" I bet they give good talks.
My elder brother, pioneer, is a construction contractor...He hires me when he can't find anyone, 'brothers of good standing' of course' and me if my wifes say he's doing good and went to a meeting..
we we're doing a AC installation on a modular on the reservation. As I was working I heard a rustle in a mesquite tree and there were 3 illegals with their hands in a praying stance and clasp at me. They begged me for water speaking spanish the way I begged my wife not to turn me in to the elders for being 'evil'. Without hessition grabbing all my water bottles except for the other cans of courage my brother didn't know about and telling him about the the 3 illegals at the back of the house......listen to this , he say "that their illegal and we could get in trouble helping them" ....Knowing I'd probably never be used by him, told him,"GO TO HELL, THERE HUMANS AND I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF I'M ARRESTED". We'll it turns out not only did he also give them all his water but his sandwichs to. Poor guys, told them be careful, down the road people have a different attitude and will turn you in.
It was very silent on the way home until I told, "do you think you should turn yourself in being that you broke a federal law, and I don't mean the law."
HE LOST IT AND TOLD ME TO " GO TO HELL"........................"I think he learned something from this.
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9
D'Fd coming to the aid of a JW in good standing
by keynumber inno he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's.
drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only i quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, getting to what i want to say.. we were moving and in the move i found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened.
i had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so i won't have to depend on jw's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get jw's.. thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #.
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keynumber
No he's not my biological brother, nor has he ever been in the position to help me, we'v in the past have been out in the ministry togethor, very quite, single brother in his late 30's. drives a little truck, he gives a ride to a specially challenged brother all the time, they never sit with each other as sister do that ride with each other to the hall, not a good speaker, reads with difficultly, sits in the back, only I quess has two suits, boots that are rounding out at the heals, a sign of walking in the city on concrete, always sits in the back looking in total peace, after the meeting stands alone in the back with a smile that tells you he's in total confidence not careing if the brothers just pass him up, real handshake, just a nice guy, GETTING TO WHAT I WANT TO SAY.
We were moving and in the move I found hedgetrimmers and blower still in the box brand new, not even opened. I had them for such a long time, never needing them, just keeping them stored along other 'junk' as wife calls it, keeping stuff just in case the tribulation comes so I won't have to depend on JW's when were hiding from the caos, that is determined to get JW's.
thought of him..,but didn't have his phone #. So I asked my wife if should get it for me as I'm df't, no help in that area, passed on a "weak" one that alwyss talks to me in the store aisles always looking over his shoulders, he didnt feel it was right, but asking me why, so told him. Finally got a secret call as his wife might hear him and gave him the number. But asked me not tell anyone. I said OK
its unbelievable just to help someone I was getting no help...Iz doing a good thing bad. it reminds me of when jesus healed the hand of i guess a lepper and the pharacess rather than looking at it as good. got themselfs forgetting the real meaning of the law...
anyway got in to him and gave a good handshake thanking me saying 'waiting you to come back' OH yaa
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52
Born-ins (childhood memories)
by tornapart inas a born in, or in at a very young age, what were your worst memories as a young jw child?.
i remember not being allowed to go to sleep in the meetings when i was tired.
not being allowed to do lots of things at school other kids could do.
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keynumber
The memory of the 69 international assembly in Los Angeles, whatching a "sky write" announcing the landing of the apollo on the moon. The pastrami sandwiches and the release of the 'truth book'.
an experience remembering getting their early to get the seats in the shade...even then the stampede always amazed me, at one moment there like horde of pigs going for its slop, along with its rude characteristic then at the next moment singing 'we are Jehovahs witnesses.'
we and my 3 other brothers and cousins were sitting behind two couples with there infants. one of my brothers 'cut-one', not a moment later the couples are checking the diapers of the babies. If only they could talk.
In some of my entries I mentioned my father maybe attended 3,4 meeting, the memorials because all his infidal brothers and friends were there. To mention this was a very small town. when it came to 'get-togethors' he hardly ever missed and would in this aspect be considered a pioneer.
The Dodger Stadium international, he and my uncles would stayed in the parking lot bbqing and drinking beer..We were hungry, but couldn't partake because one of my aunts said its eating meat sacrified to idols. At that age and time we were 'just bounceing ball' Alot has changed............................................THERE IS NO ABSOLUTE TRUTH