We are both disassociated. Both out. She hates the whole JW past. We're both active in the same 'apostate' circles and community here in Portugal.
We're still friends and I'm actually helping her in getting a second job to better support herself financially etc.
I'm still trying to understand her motives. All she says is that she feels unhappy and wants to live alone. This has been a recurring theme in our marriage for the past 15 years, in fact, since she has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I have always ascribed that impulse to her illness, and in fact it used to be coincident with periods of depression, but now that's not the case. She feels "normal" and "stable".
My most educated guess is that she has concluded that, not only her former religion, but also her marriage, have been at the root of her dissatisfaction with life. We both married too young and too inexperienced (at 21), and I think that at some point, she woke up to the fact that being married and with a family wasn't something she wanted. And now that our son is 20, and was also diagnosed bipolar, I guess it was too much for her and she just decided she didn't wanted to deal with it anymore, so she moved out. It's been a month already and she has only renewed her resolve to stay away and we're talking divorce. We both removed our wedding bands.
I'm not sure at this point I would take her back, even if she wanted to come back home. Something has broken inside, and despite the challenges of being a single parent with a son and a household on my care, I'm also enjoying being single and free to see whomever I want. I guess with every crisis comes opportunity. But it's sad, nevertheless. If this was to be the outcome, it could have happened 10 years ago and I wouldn't have had to endure such pains to keep the marriage together and we both wouldn't had wasted our time.
