reminders of an abuser
forty years later.
you reach out from the grave.
Hey Lee
Have a good day - you'll be among other with predicaments too, so maybe explore, and take a book along too?
Take care - and keep us posted!
Hey Lisa,
Yeah, my sister, the political activist. She's having a ball - just exploring, reading, MARCHING in a 4th of July parade (civil liberties group), joining some guy's political campaign, -------and learning. What a change, eh?
waiting
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 01:43 pm: .
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 04:25 pm: .
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 04:48 pm: .
I have those books. I've never read them....but I have them. Does that count?
It takes practice to mother yourself - but it can be done. And Blondie's books (I am guessing) have some good strategies.
Y'all take care -
waiting
.
.
yeah... i do it all the time... sitting at work... but instead of working i'm reading and posting here.. anyone else guilty of this?
In business for myself & don't particularily like my work....at least not after 25 yrs of same ol' - same ol'. So this is my diversion.
Thanks - keeps me awake.
waiting
reminders of an abuser
forty years later.
you reach out from the grave.
Hey Lee,
My sister had the most interesting observation about my younger brother & me, while my mother was still alive. My sister seems to have survived our family the most unscathed in many ways. Perhaps because she was the oldest, perhaps just timing. Anyway, she seems to be able to put our parents into perspective better than myself.
She lived near my mother for years.....and didn't care for her all that much. Quite respectful, etc., but definitely no "mommy" thing going on. On the other hand, my younger brother & I tried to dote on my mother, gave her gifts, called her, etc., etc. I knew she'd respond to me if I sent her gifts. Much like a grandparent does with a spoiled grandchild. Buy affection. It was a fine arrangement for me - I really didn't have to deal with her (as she was a brittle, self-centered, constanting bitching, woman) like my sister did. I just bought her when I wanted.
But in reality, I wanted her to notice me. And she never did - except when she received gifts. Same with my brother's affection for her.
Back to my sister's observation: She couldn't understand my brother & my wanting our mother's attention. She then said, "Well, if I had been distanced from her as you two were, I'd probably try to get closer too." It just stopped me. I never had her, and in a way, I could buy her attention as an adult....but not have to deal with her.
We both lost in the deal. Reality is.........I'm better off without her.
You're a fine person all by yourself. You raised yourself, your children. You are your mother and deserve your praise and affection. Tex ain't bad either......definitely not a mother figure with those legs.
waiting
reminders of an abuser
forty years later.
you reach out from the grave.
yo sweetpea.................
You're sitaution reminds me a lot of Larc's wife, Zazu. She's a remarkable woman with a slightly off-center sense of humor. If you're not emailing with her - please do. She's fun to be around, but knows her situation is still serious, but improving, after her stroke.
Mommie Dark also has major problems, and freely speaks about them. We don't get along, but other people seem to like her a lot. Perhaps The Clash of Weird Women, eh? And I am joking, if someone points this out to her. (she doesn't like me....yet another one!) But she's a remarkable woman in many ways.
In other words, there are others here (or there) who have similiar problems. Perhaps a chat group could form?
(giggle) DID people tried that.....but we think all the others are weird. (and NOW I am joking!)
I haven't looked up the other thread I brought up yesterday (memory) - did you find it? Did you watch Antwon Fisher (or Fischer)? I think you'd like it.
Btw, have you seen the movie Momemto (can rent it)? We spent lot of time on it in psych class. Also the books The Alienist and The Angel of Darkness (Caleb Cabb). My psych prof. recommended them - about the first psychologists and serial killers. Novels - but really good. I read them several years ago.
Love - waiting
jehovah's witnesses in russia are working with scientology, the unification church, mormons and others in a joint political effort to lobby the russian duma (similar to the us congress) for certain issues.
the name of this joint political lobby in russua is:
public committee for the defense of freedom of conscience.
Amazing, this is simply amazing.
It is noteworthy that all of the experts, including Barker and Richardso n , were asked the fo ll owing question by the de fendants' attorneys: "Can a person be a member of all of the above-mentioned cults at the same time?" Both scholars were warned that their answers would be pub lished o n the Internet, and each tried to avoid giving a direct answer. When pressed, both answered with a f ir m "Yes" - a rather unusual response from persons claiming to be experts in the field of NRMs.
Since Jehovah's Witnesses were in agreement with these other "destructive cults" -------- is this saying that Jehovah's Witnesses agreed with these expert witnesses............and JW's can join all of these cults at the same time?
Wooohooooo. Like somebody would have to be seriously crazy to do that, eh. - as opposed to just crazy enough to join a cult.
Thank you so much - will come back to this thread.
waiting
i thought id give you an update re whats going on.
my qing the wts of recent has been very hard on my wife.
if i could, i would change my timing of doing so, but its just the way it has happened.
My dearest Winston,
Sometimes my humor can be inappropriately timed - or so I've been told. And I didn't want you to think that of me.....at least, not yet.
But I'm glad I caught your humor too. Sometimes it's so lonely being the Only Inappropriate One.
I think you've been given a lot of good advice to ponder upon. You're doing a great job.
waiting
i thought id give you an update re whats going on.
my qing the wts of recent has been very hard on my wife.
if i could, i would change my timing of doing so, but its just the way it has happened.
.
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 01:43 pm: .
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 04:25 pm: .
posted by hope on 12-18-2002 04:48 pm: .
Hey Cathy,
Stepping in here..................
The bantering back and forth about unconditional love and how it could be a product of Satan just shows me really how lame the jws are in their thinking. If they read the scriptures in Matt 22:37-38 they begin to see that Jesus stated love. Their definitions and interpretations are bothersome.
That is such a good point. If one puts merit in Jesus - or any other wise person - love is love. lol - doesn't the bible say "God is Love." Just like all their other doctrines, they must chop the idea up to suit their own purposes..........which is, keep the followers blindly in their cult.
I guess that is what hurts, I can see past all the crap and I can love her in spite of it. I can also see were I played a part in hurting her, this added more pain to her life and I never meant to make her life any harder.
I think that's the point. A person can hurt us to the core, or we even just get too tired to play into it anymore....but we can still love them, if it's in us. We don't have to demand "don't love." We may not love them....but it's in us - not a biblical command.
Had I not studied something so condemning as astrology I would never have known my real mother. I would just have viewed her as a vindictive bitch.
Well, she still could be a vindictive bitch - there are those, yanno. And you could still love her as your mother. This is lame humor, btw - but still true. It's great that you can see your mother as a jw, a person, a mother.
Take care.
waiting
i am starting a new thread so folks do not have to search through several pages of posts to find this image.
the original thread was here.
i received the following fax this morning from my old isp(dirtclod.com was coincidentally moved the same day i received notice regarding this copyright infringement for bandwidth purposes) and was seven pages in length.
Isn't the whole point of some of the BOE letters is to put forth the procedures of the WTBTS?
How can they define their inter-organizational memos on application of rules & procedures to be implemented (such as going from pay to free to avoid sales tax) ......or on procedures on how to handle child molesters .....be thought of as "literary works of art?"
If the WTBTS takes the stand that their BOE letters on how to handle child molesters are literary works of art............then it's not a stretch to say those same procedures are fiction.
Please keep us posted, Jourles. You've found yourself in an interesting situation, eh?
waiting
