Posts by Tashawaa

30

Break through !

by Puternut in

jw
friends

i have been df'd for about a year and also been going through a nasty divorce.

my ex has the kids and they're all jw's.

so my ex has been pumping into my childrens heads, that since i am df'd, they are to have no contact with me.

I'll do what i could to get myself reinstated, as the saying go's "talk the talk and walk the walk". Suck up to the elders and tell them what they want to hear yuo don't have to mean it, and then when your inreinstated, just cool off, little or no meeting, and of course no witnessing. Do it for your kids. It will never end.

I'm sure Rick means well, but I have to go with Avishai and use the law. It looks like you won visitation rights! Your love for your kids will shine through, and they will respond.

With the above advise, the problem I have with it, is the cowering to the WTBTS, playing by their rules. They would still have control over your life. You're free and your freedom from the WTBTS will speak LOUDLY to your children.. so will your love for them.

Best of luck!

25

Relationship: Do you hold back from saying all you are thinking?

by Sassy in

i have become so much more independent and in some ways demanding as i have stopped being a jw.

there was a time when i was literally a doormat for my first husband.

but i have found from being single and then add to that losing the grip from the jw rules, i have become more independence and in many ways more of an opinion.

Tashawaa

I did talk to him about this 'thing' last night.. turns out I should have followed my gut and not my heart.. He doesn't understand as much as he wants to.......and I feel like I created a rift between us for the first time. He says I was right to talk to him about it though....and upset I waited a few days to do so.. but I can't help but be sorry I said anything at all.....

Oh, God, no Sassy. We don't know "what the thing is" but follow your heart! Firstly, you didn't create a rift - it was there. You felt it, and now you've brought it to his attention. He says you were right to bring it up ... now he may need some time to sort it out (or his thoughts). You're establishing a trust, an intimacy in bringing up things that you could ignore (and have fester inside you) and sharing them with him... He obviously wants to know, and it looks like he couldn't understand why you held it in so long (a few days). Don't be sorry you said anything at all. It was (IMO) the right thing to do. If it was reversed - he felt or needed to talk to you about "this thing" - would you have wanted to know?

25

Relationship: Do you hold back from saying all you are thinking?

by Sassy in

i have become so much more independent and in some ways demanding as i have stopped being a jw.

there was a time when i was literally a doormat for my first husband.

but i have found from being single and then add to that losing the grip from the jw rules, i have become more independence and in many ways more of an opinion.

Tashawaa

I have gotten WAY more outspoken in my relationship. I use to be a typical "JW wife" fully in subjection to her husband....

But now, I'm in a great relationship with a younger man. I'm more confident and I do speak my mind. If somethings bothering me, I speak up. He does the same. Speaking whats on your mind, doesn't mean being rude, disrespectful or hurtful - but it does mean being honest. Sometimes, we'll put aside an evening, drink wine and talk. Trust me, by the end of a good two bottles, you're talking about EVERYTHING. We've worked thru alot and I don't feel his loving me, or my loving him is dependant on saying (or not saying) the right thing.

27

Can you get DF'd for having interactions with someone thats DF'd?

by Agent Smith in

jw
friends

.

whats taken into consideration when this happens?

Tashawaa

*** w81 9/15 29 If a Relative Is Disfellowshiped . . . ***
The second situation that we need to consider is that involving a disfellowshiped or disassociated relative who is not in the immediate family circle or living at one?s home. Such a person is still related by blood or marriage, and so there may be some limited need to care for necessary family matters.

Thats what they used on me. My sis who was living with me disassociated. I wouldn't have her leave, so I got df'd.

59

WITNESS WORLD IS CLOSING DOWN

by DevonMcBride in

jw
friends

this was posted on ww today.

do you think the apostate infiltration had anything to do with it?.

in the name of christian unity and peace, we regret to inform you that the management of ww has decided to close the ?park?

Tashawaa

They're sure emphasing the "peace" angle..... guess they couldn't handle theocratic warfare!

104

Are You Going To The Memorial This Year?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i think it's april 4th.

(i think).

are you going?

Tashawaa

drwtsn32 .... ditto

3

Help... Valentine's Day

by Tashawaa in

i feel like a dweeb.

perhaps its because this is my first valentine's day to ever celebrate, plus i'm finally in a great relationship with someone i love.. i must be the most unromantic person on earth!!!!

i have no clue what to do for valentine's day.

Tashawaa

Thanks Lisa,

I've already started racking my brain. I know I'll come up with something, I've got a whole month. I just started to panic.

3

Help... Valentine's Day

by Tashawaa in

i feel like a dweeb.

perhaps its because this is my first valentine's day to ever celebrate, plus i'm finally in a great relationship with someone i love.. i must be the most unromantic person on earth!!!!

i have no clue what to do for valentine's day.

Tashawaa

I feel like a dweeb. Perhaps its because this is my first Valentine's day to EVER celebrate, plus I'm finally in a great relationship with someone I love.

I must be the most UNROMANTIC person on earth!!!! I have no clue what to do for Valentine's day. I don't want to give him chocolates or flowers... nothing as expensive as for a b'day or xmas...

I want to come up with an original, non-embarrassing idea. The thing is, we also work for the same company (different departments), so obviously, I don't want to send him anything to work.

I know this post is close to a month early, but I want to start brain storming. Anyone have any good ideas or past experiences?????

Guys - what would you like?

36

Tips For Lurkers To Get Out

by minimus in

jw
friends

do you have any suggestions to help jehovah's witnesses who visit this site get out of the religion?

Tashawaa

Strawberry - WELCOME!!!

Having friends outside the org helps in a BIG way. Talking... seeing that "worldly" is just a negative word for "normal". It helps to start seeing the world in a positive way, not the drilled in negative way (living in the last days, blah blah blah). Try doing a google search on the 1400s and tell me we're living in the worst time period ever!

Anyhoo... hope to hear more from you. I should talk. I've been on this board awhile and I'm still a "junior"

36

Tips For Lurkers To Get Out

by minimus in

jw
friends

do you have any suggestions to help jehovah's witnesses who visit this site get out of the religion?

Tashawaa

I lurked for quite awhile before I got out.

First, I had to leave mentally... I knew it wasn't the truth and the research proved this to me. I read everything I could get my hands on, and started to form my own "spirituality"... allowed myself to question. I felt if it "was the truth" it could stand up to the scrutiny (it didn't).

Then I started to build an outside support system. Friends. My workplace helped alot, and I started to associate with people (who today still are my friends).

I talked about my doubts and feelings to a sibling and LOW & BEHOLD, she was feeling the same way. We made the break together... but I was prepared for the worse. Our family shuns us, however some keep secret contact.

My meeting attendance dropped slowly over all this time, I avoided the elders, and got my service hours to drop over time until I was "inactive".

Once I was ready for the complete break I made it official. Not to play their game - but for me it was a sense of "closure". I can say that I am no longer a Jehovah's Witness.