AndDontCallMeShirley

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Posts by AndDontCallMeShirley

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  56

  2014 increase in Memorial Partakers to 14,121

  by jwfacts in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i have updated the article at memorial partakers with the figures released for 2014. no surprises here, it has risen yet again, this time by 6% over last year, and is now 14,121.. .

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  All it means, according to WT's view of its own people, is that the number of JWs with mental problems is increasing:

   

  w11 8/15 p. 22 Questions From Readers

  Memorial partakers. This is the number of baptized individuals who partake of the emblems at the Memorial worldwide. Does this total represent the number of anointed ones on earth? Not necessarily. A number of factors—including past religious beliefs or even mental or emotional imbalance—might cause some to assume mistakenly that they have the heavenly calling.

   
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  24

  2014 Grand Totals!

  by Atlantis in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

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  .. .. atlantis!.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  @ Chas: Depends what you are selling... but maybe not if it takes 11,000 hours to sell one $45 Million private jet.

   

  Yeah, but it makes all the difference in the world if you claim god is helping you sell jets and it's critical to sell as many jets as possible in the shortest period of time. Add to that the very real possibility there's a 67% chance the sale contract will be cancelled before delivery and it's still a loser.
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  39

  1914 to 2014: The funniest JW moments of this century.

  by African GB Member Jr in

  1. social
  2. humour

  i just thought we could share some of the funniest moments since its the holiday season and we are taking things easy.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

   "WTFness" ( from the Unabridged Vidctionary of Modern Watchtower-isms)

   

  Indeed. 
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  33

  Proud JW.ORG Photos everyone needs to see! The Watchtower Sanctified the Internet for Preaching!

  by Trailer Park Pioneer in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i am proud to be a jehovah's witness in the last days, what religion has done this much to proclaim the message about the organization?

  other religions are preaching about jesus, some wear the crucifixion, other's wear shirts with fishes but we wear shirts with jw.org!

  no other religion has our courage!.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  Now this is what I call junk food...

   

   

  I guess JWs can have their website and eat it too.

   
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  8

  It is the Good News THEY preach now, not of the Bible. Are you as sick of it as I am? New title for Watchtower magazine.

  by Wasanelder Once in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i am so sick of this pretend religion that has now come to the point of showing its true colors.

  the colors are white and blue.

  this picture captures the true purpose of the watchtower these days.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  "Millions now Living Will Never Log On"

   

  The WT is becoming more superficial everyday. Telling people to go to a website now constitutes a ministry, and JWs can sleep soundly knowing they did their Christian duty and saved lives by faithfully wearing their "JW Org" pin while they sipped a double Latte at Starbucks on a Saturday morning.
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  6

  The overuse of adjectives tells me they don't understand a thing.

  by Rattigan350 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  the w 3/15/2015 page 8 para 5 says:.

  "one faithful anointed brother with a record of decades of loyal service commented: i just read the book of job in the new edition, and i feel as if i understand it for the first time!

  " many have made similar comments.".

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  "one faithful anointed brother with a record of decades of loyal service commented: “I just read the book of Job in the new edition, and I feel as if I understand it for the first time!"  Many have made similar comments."

   

  Of course, WT's goal is to promote the rNWT as a monumental achievement through its usual self-aggrandizing rhetoric. It must convince JWs they've received something truly special.

  However, in true WT fashion, it its attempt to brag about itself it has raised a question JWs will never stop to ask themselves:

  "How sh*tty did the old NWT have to be that a JW could read it their entire life and still not understand a damn thing?" 

  The NWT  was supposed to be god's gift to WT and the greatest Bible ever produced, but the above quote pretty much obliterates that claim by WT again shooting itself in the foot. 
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  24

  2014 Grand Totals!

  by Atlantis in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

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  .. .. atlantis!.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  JeffT:  it takes 11,000 hours to get one more publisher.  This has to be about the most inefficient human activity ever.

   

  Use dollars instead of hours and it really puts things in perspective. If a company invested $2 billion and got a return of only $275,000 shareholders would go ballistic. The Board would rightly be called failures.

  If a salesman worked 11,000 hours for one sale he'd be fired as a dismal, time-wasting slug. 

  But in WT Land, the same results are called an incredible, history-making success all due to god's obvious blessing. Uh huh. 

   

  50% + of baptisms are children of JWs or people not found in door-to-door activity. So, WT did not baptize 275,000 converts. At best, it baptized 136,000 converts.

  375,000 babies are born every day; WT baptizes 375 converts (very generous figure) every day. Essentially WT is bailing out the ocean with a tin cup.

  Everyday that passes obligates Jehovah to kill another 374,625 people at Armageddon while WT saves a miniscule 375.

  And this is the greatest preaching effort ever made? 
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  34

  NEW LIGHT ALERT! TARGET 2015 END TIMES! EVE WAS CREATED 40 YEARS AFTER ADAM! THE END IS NEAR!

  by Trailer Park Pioneer in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is going around the kingdom halls now, i thought it was a hoax but are not all the end time dates produced by the organization some hoax or con?

  the reason why the end did not come in 1975 was the watchtower society had not put eve's creation in their equation.

  i was told when we had a "meet and greet" if "we knew the date of eve's creation we would know the year jehovah was going to destroy the earth.. it's been 40 years since 1975, can you believe it's been 40 years since "stay alive till 1975!"?

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

   I remember the embarrassment of reading the Time article of July 11 1977, where Fred Franz states that the problem is we don't know how long it took Adam to name the animals, oy.

  LOL. 

  God couldn't move forward until Adam named a Chihuahua a "Chihuahua", and Franz couldn't move forward until he figured this vital piece of information out.

  Minutiae and silliness bog god's celestial chariot down into the quagmire of a muddy country road everytime.
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  33

  Proud JW.ORG Photos everyone needs to see! The Watchtower Sanctified the Internet for Preaching!

  by Trailer Park Pioneer in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i am proud to be a jehovah's witness in the last days, what religion has done this much to proclaim the message about the organization?

  other religions are preaching about jesus, some wear the crucifixion, other's wear shirts with fishes but we wear shirts with jw.org!

  no other religion has our courage!.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  Other religions are preaching about Jesus, some wear the Crucifixion, other's wear shirts with fishes but we wear shirts with JW.ORG!  No other religion has our courage!

   

  Here's what JWs miss: when the scummy dross (all other Christians) wear a crucifix, a fish shirt or display a WWJD? bumper sticker, people immediately think of just one thing: Jesus.

  When a JW displays their "JW Org" dime store swag, people think of one thing: a manmade organization with a crappy website. No one sees "JW Org" and thinks "Jesus". 

  Incidentally, how in the hell does it take "courage" to wear a lapel pin or sit by a literature cart? 

   

   @ BThe ex-B: Plenty of religious nutjobs in the Middle East and elsewhere are spilling blood and posting it on the Net. JWs don't even get noticed in the modern world.

  JWs kill a morning sipping their Starbucks Grande Mocha Latte while they watch their cart comfortably from 30 feet away;  Islamic nutters kill people for their faith.  JWs vs. Islam reminds me of a saying:

   "In a ham and egg breakfast, the chicken's involved but the pig's committed". 

   

  Infer from that what you will. 

   

   

   
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  10

  The spirituality of science

  by Coded Logic in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  things are often more than the sum of their parts.

  the letters typed onto this page, for example, are more than just letters.

  they've become a series of ideas and concepts.

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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  Very nicely written, CL. Pondering the grandeur of it all is certainly humbling, and to consider the building material that constitutes what is "us" is awesome indeed.

   

  Carl Sagan expressed his thoughts, which mirror yours very closely:

   

   

  "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality. When we recognize our place in an immensity of light‐years and in the passage of ages, when we grasp the intricacy, beauty, and subtlety of life, then that soaring feeling, that sense of elation and humility combined, is surely spiritual. So are our emotions in the presence of great art or music or literature, or acts of exemplary selfless courage such as those of Mohandas Gandhi or Martin Luther King, Jr. The notion that science and spirituality are somehow mutually exclusive does a disservice to both."