Bonsai

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Posts by Bonsai

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  34

  The "5 Pillars" of Witness life...

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  oh, there is one brother that keeps prattling on about "the 5 pillars of faith and worship".

  - prayer.

  - personal study.

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  Bonsai

  The five pillars of my prison cell:

  -Fear

  -Guilt

  -Obligation

  -Isolation
  

  -Denial
  
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  27

  Ex-Christians being angry

  by Jonathan Drake in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know i'm angry.

  i was curious if others are too.

  i feel completely justified in my anger as well.

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  Bonsai

  For me the anger has come and gone over the months. Now I'm just profoundly sad. I yearn so much to see the human family released from the chains of pain,suffering and death. Losing my faith has not solved any of those problems.

  If only a loving, just, father-like God really existed...
  

  I'll give that meditation technique a try during my hike today.
  
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  28

  Newbies , Are We Seeing An Accelerated Increase? This Past Year ? Newbies Feel free To Respond Please .

  by smiddy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  is it just me or does anyone else see more newbies joining this site this past year and especially in the last few months .. we would love to welcome you with genuine friendship ,support ,encouragement ,a place to vent ,and not judge you.. you have the freedom to express whatever view you like and you won`t be kicked off the board.. and to learn more about the "truth" about the truth , you will not hear at a kingdom hall .. smiddy.

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  Bonsai

  I'm a newbie here. I've been lurking/posting a bit here and there for a few months now. I think there are many like me who are getting older (late 20's to early 40's) and finding it more and more difficult to believe unquestionably all the JW doctrine and its recent flip flops/changes. In my case, it just got harder and harder to believe with the intensity of a works-based faith that JW Land requires. Believing in invisible things is hard enough. On top of that we have to shun df'd family and refuse medical help that could save our loved ones lives. Also, I just got tired of preaching to everyone that they are wrong, I'm right and if you don't except it the crows are gonna be pecking at your corpse any day now.

  I always hated the term apostate. It's a term that is too easily abused and used to scare people. It's like the term "witch" in the early American colonial days. I believe most people on this site are searchers for truth who think outside of the box that society/religion created for us from long ago before we were born.

  I would like to express my appreciation to Simon for making this site and to all of you others who provide interesting and thought-provoking comments to chew over.

  I'm not here on a mission to bash JW Land and prove it wrong. Maybe this is the truth. I don't know. I only know that I'm tired, burnt out and yearn for freedom of thought and freedom of conscience. What changes will take place in the org. for the better or worse? What developments will take place as far as bible prophecy is concerned? I'm waiting and watching. I think I've learned enough at this point in my life to know that I really don't know anything.
  
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  17

  Just another experience

  by bradford in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i just wanted to add another piece to the puzzle that is the exile from the organization.

  a little background about myself first.

  i was not born into the religion, technically.

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  Bonsai

  Welcome Bradford. Our stories are very similar. Too bad (because of distance) we couldn't shoot some hoops and talk about stuff over a beer. I don't recommend disassociating yourself if it's an angry emotional response to what you've learned recently. But if it's killing you mentally not to cut ties... each must do what he thinks is best. Hang in there man. Your wife will need you to be there for her emotionally and mentally now more than ever.
  
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  4

  What keeps me away from the JWs religion!

  by Wonderment in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  there are a few things that have kept me away from the jws organizaction.

  these are the most prominent.. 1. jesus has been pushed aside, and replaced by the governing body.

  wrong!!!!!!.

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  Bonsai

  What keeps me away is knowing that if I go to a meeting, I will more than likely be pressured and guilt tripped by its members, fear mongered by the meetings contents and obligated to come again as I am love bombed into submission.
  

  I'm sick and tired of hearing that we are deep into the latter half of the final remaining few days of the imminent conclusion of the end of this system of things. That 7+ billion people have to die because they don't know their left hand from their right. That god has been invisible for thousands of years and will only appear again to smite 99% of the world population. That how wonderful it will be to build a paradise over the bones and carcasses of women, children and babies. Hey, they will make great fertilizer for your dream vegetable garden right?

  I have always been racked by survivor's guilt. Meetings just stir my cognitive dissonance and cause me great discomfort.

  The world isn't pretty most of the time. There are grave problems that need fixing. But I need something that gives me mental stability to deal with the reality I live in. Messages of doom and gloom mixed with "God Is Love" just aren't cutting it for my mental health.
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  104

  The Secret is out....but nobody cares

  by MrTheocratic in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i've been looking on this site for some time but never posted.

  i'll give a little about myself, but not too much.

  i'm a ex-bethelite ( brooklyn )and currently serving as an elder (10 years) (thinking about stepping down) on the service committee.

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  Bonsai

  Welcome Mr. Theocratic.

  I have found your observations to be exactamente correcto. I recently revealed to my two close friends why I have stopped attending meetings. They both acknowledged that my reasons were legitimate. One said that he wasn't in a hurry to leave because he had family in and he felt like even if "the truth" wasn't the truth, he viewed it as a kind of life insurance that may or may not give him a chance to survive after death. The other one also said that even if everything was a lie, at least being a part of the organization gave him a place in society. For him it's like the bar in the Cheers sitcom where "everybody knows your name". That was what was most important to him. People are in for various reasons, but not necessarily because they believe everything about what they are told.
  

  Sooner or later I need to get around to formally introducing myself as well. I'm just not quite ready yet.

  Thanks for adding your thoughts on the forum.
  
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  145

  Why attack?

  by newqatarjob in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  as someone brought up as a jw and been an elder and been disfellowshipped (twice!!!

  ) i find it difficult to understand why ex jws have to attack the religion, yes religion, not cult or sect.

  i am no longer disfellowshipped just do not want to practice anymore.

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  Bonsai

  When In Doubt, I guess I don't see what the problem is here. This is not a forum for hate discussions about Jehovah's Witnesses. Many people here are for reform, change and seeing the organization start to take more responsibility and accountability for some of its actions/mistakes that have hurt us, our family or our friends. It's not about hate. We don't wish for the death and destruction or physical harm of any JW or their leaders. I know I don't hate them. They do rile me, disgust me, disappoint me at times.But so have my friends from time to time. Yet, when my friends take accountability and express sorry with a heartfelt apology, then I am more than willing to forgive them. Many of us are waiting hopefully for the day when Watchtower will do that. But hate? I think you are overreacting a bit here.
  

  Throughout history there have been many organizations/societies/ religions that have been oppressive in not allowing free thought. They used fear, guilt and the massive weight of social/religious obligation to exhaust the people into submission. As a result an equal and opposite reaction has taken place. Those that were stifled by communism, dictators, popes,regimes and the religious elite, were forced to find a safe outlet to vent their frustration and anger so as not to build up rage to the point of committing hate crimes.or actions they would live to regret. They did so within their community, or in their home or in secret meetings to vent.
  

  I feel this site is just Newton's third law of physics in that its a natural reaction to an oppressive regime that stifles its sheep with guilt and fear. Somewhere along the stream of time the true Christian love that Jesus talked about at John 13:35 was lost and replaced by a synthetic, artificial love that just doesn't sustain its members anymore.
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  145

  Why attack?

  by newqatarjob in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  as someone brought up as a jw and been an elder and been disfellowshipped (twice!!!

  ) i find it difficult to understand why ex jws have to attack the religion, yes religion, not cult or sect.

  i am no longer disfellowshipped just do not want to practice anymore.

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  Bonsai

  "Live and let live."

  Boy, you are preaching to the quire here. Most of us are on here because they won't leave us alone when we chose to fade away or take a break even. I have avoided "attacking" many times even though they have come to my door or sent me emails attacking my motives, sanity, morality, manliness for leaving. I'm not even df'd or da'd! Why the attacks on me? Take your self righteous email and send it to the society instead of here. Do something productive.
  
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  16

  Tomato or tomoto? Is it geehovah or jahovah?

  by hoser in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  how do you say it where you are?

  geehovah or jahovah?

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  Bonsai

  I went from a country where they pronounced it "Yeah-hugh-hwa" to a place now where they say, "eh-hoe-bah".
  

  Now I'm too superstitious to say the name so I remove the superstitious title of adonai from the tetrogrammamegatron and i get... i get... I dunno. Sigh.
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  10

  Anyone else like Radiohead?

  by LoveUniHateExams in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  over the past couple of weeks, i've discovered the 'alternative rock group' radiohead.

  of course, i've known of their name for years and years but never, until recently, bothered to check out their music.

  i'm also quite a big fan of damon albarn and admire him not only for his substantial musical output but also for the different 'feel' to his songs - oasis, in contrast, seem to have just one beatles-esque style.

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  Bonsai

  But I'm a creep
  I'm a weirdo
  What the hell am I doing here?
  I don't belong here.

  One of my favorite songs that I can totally relate to right now. It's how I felt at meetings. It's how I feel now. Whenever someone asks why I've faded, no matter how rational or logical the response that I give is, they give me the look that I'm a creep and a villain for entertaining doubts.

  Great band.