Abbadon
Your parents sound like mine! Lovely but deluded.
scotsman
JoinedPosts by scotsman
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34
How do you view your parents ????? very tough question !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by run dont walk inbeing brought up in the borg since birth, i beleived everything my parents taught me and showed me, i looked up to them, they were my heroes in life.. now, i look back, they lied to me, cheated me, mislead me, did not look out for my best interests, and abadonned me when i needed them the most,.
i have nothing good to say about them (or my brothers and sisters), like to tie them both to a tree and ----- them.
they are very stupid people.. i'm sure i will wrestle with this the rest of my life.. thanks so much watchtower bible and tract society !!!!!!!!!!
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Do you ever mention to anyone you were a JW ??? or keep it secret ???
by run dont walk in.
workmates, friends, school friends etc,.
do you ever mention it, or if someone asks you your religion, do you ever mention it, or keep it in your past ??
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scotsman
I didn't keep it secret when I was one and I don't now that I've left either. It took a major chunk of my life so I can't ignore it, and I'm not ashamed of it either. Most people that I've told have found it fascinating as they've had little contact with any Witnesses.
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Help with Grief
by Sirona ini'd appreciate any links or book recommendations to help with grief.
i've searched the net, but thought that you would all have some good input.
basically i'm trying to help someone very close to me who is shattered with grief (the death happened only 2 days ago).. please tell me about your own experiences in helping someone in this situation.
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scotsman
Hi Sirona
Everyone seems to have given you helpful advice. The books I referred to that you may find helpful now, and your friend later are:
Aspects of Grief, Jane Littlewood
Widow's Journey, Xenia Rose
When the Crying's Done, Jeanette Kupfermann
The fact that your giving the situation such thought and attention indicates that you're doing the right thing already in being a caring friend.
Euan
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interracial dating
by Maverick inlazuli got me thinking....(thanks lazuli...feels good!
) about the wts and how its policies change peoples outlooks and values.
i was....as much as i hate to admit it....born in the northeast, but moved to the south as a teenager.
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scotsman
The most recent reference I could find was in g98 1/22 pp19-21 in an article titled What If My Parents Oppose My Marriage?
What
About Racial or Cultural Differences?Lynn?s parents raised objections for a different reason: She wanted to marry a man of a different race. What does the Bible teach in this regard? It tells us that "God is not partial" and that "he made out of one man every nation of men." (Acts 10:34, 35; 17:26) Humans have a common origin and are of equal value in God?s sight.
Even so, while all married couples suffer "tribulation in their flesh," interracial couples may experience additional challenges. (1 Corinthians 7:28) Why? Because many people in today?s hate-filled world do not accept God?s viewpoint on race. While interracial marriages have become increasingly commonplace in some Western lands, there are still areas where mixed couples encounter strong prejudice. Your parents may therefore fear that you are not equipped to deal with such pressures.
"My folks thought it would be very hard on us," admits Lynn. Wisely, Lynn showed respect for their feelings and did not rush into marriage. As her parents observed Lynn?s maturity and became better acquainted with the man she loved, they gradually began to feel reasonably confident that she could handle the pressures of this marriage. Says Lynn: "Once they felt we could be truly happy together, they also were happy for us."
Sometimes, though, the issue is not race but culture. Your parents may be concerned that, in the long run, you would find it difficult to enjoy living with someone whose life-style, expectations, and tastes in food, music, and entertainment are so different from yours. In any event, marrying someone of a different race or of a different culture can present big challenges. Are you really up to meeting them?
And this is what the 1960 article said
The official line.*** w60 7/15 pp. 447-448 Questions from Readers ***
Questions from Readers
? Is it wrong for a white person and a colored one to marry if they truly love each other? Does the Bible give any counsel in this regard??W. M., U.S.A.God?s Word does not forbid marriage between the races. On the contrary, it shows that all races are related in that they all came from one man originally. (Acts 17:26) No one race is esteemed better in God?s sight than another. As the apostle Peter expressed it: "God is not partial, but in every nation the man that fears him and works righteousness is acceptable to him."?Acts 10:34, 35.
What God?s Word does command is that dedicated Christians should marry "only in the Lord." Should it happen that one or the other had been married before, it would be necessary that they be Scripturally free; either in that the mate is deceased or has been legally divorced because of adultery.?1 Cor. 7:39.
Obviously, those who marry seek happiness. And the Scriptures indicate that a marriage or wedding should be a very happy occasion. The countless happily married couples give evidence that marriage can bring deep satisfactions, contentment and much joy. However, it also follows that due to human imperfection marriage does bring with it a certain amount of "tribulation in their flesh," as the apostle Paul terms it.?1 Cor. 7:28.
It is quite likely that those who marry across racial lines will have more of this tribulation than will others. Christians cannot change prevailing human customs, prejudices and laws but must put up with them. They should therefore take a very realistic view of matters and recognize the added difficulties such a marriage will have to face. In many parts of the earth there is still much racial discrimination, and entering such a marriage may result in restricting the Christian?s opportunities for preaching the good news of God?s kingdom. Also, children born of such a marriage most likely will face similar added obstacles as soon as they are old enough to mingle with other children.
Then again, the law in certain lands and states forbids interracial marriage. Since Christians must recognize Caesar?s right to regulate marriage, Christians residing in such states or lands and contemplating interracial marriage would have to move to a land or state where such marriages are legal, and it would be inadvisable for them to return to their own land or state or to go to any others having such laws.
In view of these factors, those who contemplate such a marriage will do well to consider the step seriously. Is it truly love or chiefly physical attraction? Would it be in the best interests of both? Is this marriage the best possible solution to their problem or reason for wanting to marry? Before marriage the love between two persons may seem sufficiently strong, but is it strong enough to endure the added obstacles such a marriage brings with it? If two persons of different races decide to take such a step, no one should criticize them. The really important factors, it may not be forgotten, are those plainly stated in the Scriptures.
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47
interracial dating
by Maverick inlazuli got me thinking....(thanks lazuli...feels good!
) about the wts and how its policies change peoples outlooks and values.
i was....as much as i hate to admit it....born in the northeast, but moved to the south as a teenager.
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scotsman
I can check out the Watchtower CD tomorrow. But in the mean time - 1968? I believe they will have changed their stance since then. As has society.
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47
interracial dating
by Maverick inlazuli got me thinking....(thanks lazuli...feels good!
) about the wts and how its policies change peoples outlooks and values.
i was....as much as i hate to admit it....born in the northeast, but moved to the south as a teenager.
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scotsman
Sometimes I despair.
The WTBTS is not 'officially' against interracial relationships. In my 30 years as a JW I never heard anyone express even unofficial racism.
Scotland is predominently white but I know of plenty interracial marriages amongst the Witnesses and know of none of them recieving any sort of prejudice from within their congregations. I do recall there being an article in the Awake about the difficulties that cross cultural relationships can have, but it was about how to handle them not a reason to discourage them.
I hate the WTBTS but erroneous slurs distract from their real evils.
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Help with Grief
by Sirona ini'd appreciate any links or book recommendations to help with grief.
i've searched the net, but thought that you would all have some good input.
basically i'm trying to help someone very close to me who is shattered with grief (the death happened only 2 days ago).. please tell me about your own experiences in helping someone in this situation.
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scotsman
It's not the time that heals, it's what's done with the time that determines whether we heal. Loss isn't something to get over, it's something we learn to live with. After my dad died, it was a project for me to get my Mum back on her feet, for her to have a life as an independant woman. It took about three years and although she relied on me heavily at times, she got there. She traveled to the States, Russia, Europe and the Far East having been only to Paris in the 50's. She learned to play the flute and took up the Alexander Technique. I was, and am, really proud of how she took control of her life (apart from still being a JW!)
I was 20 when my dad died 12 years ago, and I'm sorry that we didn't have the time to establish a properly adult relationship (but then who ever manages that!) but I still think of him often via music we both like and interests that we share. As a family we all talked about him a lot in the months after he died, talked about what he'd have thought about things that happened.
12 years later I have no shame when I occasionally cry when thinking about him.
euan
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Help with Grief
by Sirona ini'd appreciate any links or book recommendations to help with grief.
i've searched the net, but thought that you would all have some good input.
basically i'm trying to help someone very close to me who is shattered with grief (the death happened only 2 days ago).. please tell me about your own experiences in helping someone in this situation.
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scotsman
Hi Sirona
Pop in to Waterstones, they usually have a few titles. There were 3 my mum read after my dad died that she found helpful and she doles them out to friends. I'll get back to you on their titles. In the meantime, it's early days for your friend and just being there for them is important. It may be too soon for them to read books on bereavement, but you'll find them helpful.
All the best.
Euan
edited to add: being there now is important, but being there in the coming weeks and months is more important as it's as everone else moves on with their lives that the bereaved feel really at a loss.
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Letter to Mom and Dad opinions wanted
by freelife inhello friends, i wanted to post this here and get some opinions on it before i take the big step of sending it to my parental units.
dear mom and dad,
dad i was surprised to hear from you the other day.
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scotsman
You've had good advice already but I understand how torn you'll feel. The urge to be the one that terminates the relationship when you think they're about to do so is hard to resist. It also makes you feel that you have a little control over what is a monstrous situation.
You may feel like shit either way, but if you let them reject you at least you may eventually feel a little virtuous.
Good luck.
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Further Education
by scotsman ini had lunch with a jw friend who's just finished a law degree.
she was saying that at the last circuit assembly the bethel speaker, (philip longstaffe) said that the society had not changed its stance on further education, and that college for vocational skills was all that they thought was ok. my friend's a bit of a free thinker (i'd half hoped that this lunch date was to tell me she had doubts, but no) so she doesn't give fig what they think.
i was actually appointed as an elder the month before i started attending uni and the co had told the other elders it was no reason to prevent my appointment.. anyone else heard this at their assemblies?
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scotsman
Subsequently I mentioned this to my brother, a P.O., as he was at the same assembly. He understood the comments quite differently as it made him think there would be no problem for his kids to go to uni (they're currently aged 4 and 7!). Same talk, same, place, same speaker, but a different interpretation. Funny how the Borg is like that.