Posts by m0nk3y

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

Actually northern girl don't you break your own bibles good advice of ..

judge no one concerning the sabbath and abstain from blood.

monk3y.

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

Sphere you are an amazing person!! To take the difficult situation that you have been in and to do somthing positive with it is completely inspiring to me. You obviously have a very kind and generous heart.

I remember a conversation I had with an elder’s wife. I wanted to know why some people were gay. She said, “It’s because they dwell on immoral thoughts”. And so I asked her “How do you keep yourself from thinking about other women”. She literally gasped and said firmly and loudly “I have never had immoral thoughts about another women!” And so I asked her “How does Ed (her elder hubby) keep from fantasizing about other men? She just spluttered.

This made me laugh, people liket his just don't get it. Perhaps if they actually campared what they were saying with their own situation they might start to grasp it.

It is not a choice, if it was my ex would have changed and so would the great majority of others. No one chooses to be a minority that is so tromped upon. It happens in about ten percent of the population, the same as in the animal kingdom.

Your ex obviously choose you in the first place because of your beautiful nature, if sexuality was choice I have no doubt at all he would be straight and with you.

Thank you.

Josh

58

My story (in depth) PHEW!

by Aztec in

i've shared a bit about my experiences but i don't think i ever gone into much detail.

i'm setting this down as an example of what growing up a witness can be like for any lurkers who have doubts or questions.

i was born into a family of witnesses.

m0nk3y

Aztec, my life was bad .. but a breeze compared to what you have endured *HUGZ* I am glad you are here on the otherside standing with us with strength. My guts tightened so much reading your story. You are truely a very strong person, thank you for sharing it with us.

Josh

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

Ok this is all very overwhelming. I want to make sure I convey exactly the things that I want to say here.

Firstly I would like to say that by posting my story was in no way asking for or wanting sympathy, the main reason I wanted to post it was because I want people I talk to on a day to day basis to understand the inner workings of myself. The 2 nd reason was because I wanted some on here that are otherwise inclined to get a positive, direct and raw insight on exactly what people have to go through to be true to themselves when they are gay. Thirdly I want to help other people gay/lesbian/transgender/straight to relate and gather strength from my strength. The reasons are all 100% important to me, despite them being place in a particular order does not mean that they are of lesser importance than the reason above them.

I have been using the internet and chat for at least half of my lifetime so I am very familiar with it. So let me be the first it saying how ridiculous it is to be offended by me sharing northern girls Message to me. The reason why it’s ridiculous is because PM’s are a way of communicating something to one person without having to discuss it with another person. For example, if my friend Vanessa rang me on the phone or was to come and talk to me at home while everyone else was busy doing something and told me such and such, wouldn’t I be able to convey that message to my boyfriend or whoever else ? On the other hand if Vanessa was to say to me I’m telling you this but I would like for you not to mention it to anyone the matter would be different again. To compare a PM with a Priests use of information is stupid !

I have received many PM’s on this site that are particularly personal and private and are said as such, I wouldn’t even dream of sharing even a small portion of them with anyone else. I think that the idea of ALL PM’s being private and secret comes from to many of you bitching about other people on this site in secret, which is fine with me, bitch all you like but for god sake don’t try and compare it.

I felt it was important to show this message of northern girls because of my above reasons for posting my story in the first place. I, as a gay man have had many people like northern girl talk to me separated from other people and tell me their harsh view of me .. It’s very disheartening and difficult to deal with .. Especially when your weak and new to expressing how you feel. It’s important that I show this to other people that might just be coming to terms with being “out” because it can have such a negative effect that you feel that the feelings and thoughts of these type of people are what to expect from most people, when in fact it’s the opposite which this thread thanks to me posting it and northern girls PM have shown.

I would also like to point out this which I cut and pasted directly from the terms of use above ..

4. You acknowledge that communications to or with bulletin board services, chat areas, news groups, forums, communities and/or other message or communication facilities are not private communications, therefore others may read your communications without your knowledge. You should always use caution when providing any personal information about yourself or your family.

Although I WOULD NOT share anything sombody told me in confidence in PM unless of course the situation was extreme to the point of being a police matter.

Monk3y

I thank the rest of you for your heartfelt thoughts, it is much appreciated.

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

Awwww heheh good for you Jade. People like you make me proud. *hugz*

Josh

22

The Bible Code

by m0nk3y in

i was in a book store today and there were a couple of books entitled somthing like "the bible code" .

the idea goes that the bible is written a certain code that when decoded reveals prophcies about things like the twin towers and that kind of thing.

heres a few links to explain more.

m0nk3y

Actually you raised some rather obvious and extremely valid points badolputtytat

monk3y

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

northern girl I feel sad for you. You said -

The wagons have circled. I give up but only because everyone of you are so close minded. Ravyn, I read your post ... youv'e had enough life time experiences for a few people.
Who would all of you have to blame for all your problems if it wasn't for the big bad WTBS. Don't you think it's time to shut the door on the past and move on. Really, there is more to life.

The reason I feel sad for you is that you cannot accept that my story isn't about my hatred of the WTBS. To be honest I don't know how you got that impression from my story. It comes down simply to me being brought up to believe with all of my heart that my god hated who I was, being taught that Jehovahs Witnesses are the most loving people and sadly most of them are not living by the reputation that they constantly profess. As far as I'm concerned when I express my anger about it I don't see the WTBS .. I see the people that failed me despite promising they wouldn't. I see the faces of those peoples that I grew up with turning their back on me in my greatest time of need.

I'm sorry you are the type of person that despite my pain and anguish that I have gone through to write this story and share it with others feels the need to tell me that I need a reality check when clearly it's you that doesnt understand reality. I am very sorry. Stop labeling people with ideas and comformistic impressions .. get to know each persons story and feelings .. at the heart of that lies understanding for you fellow man and within that lies your salvation.

Josh

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

Thank you everyone, nearly all of your comments have been simply amazing. I thought I would have myself pulled together a little better than I was yesterday but clearly my story has taken more out of me the I first realised. It really is heat warming to positive comments from so many different walks of life, to share the same opinions and greif with people who arn't gay just shows how simalar and yet different we all are.

czarofmischeif -

To my pain and shame I used to be one those judgemental types - please forgive me, Josh, and all of you that I rejected because of their sexuality. I was raised the same way you were, the same patterns of thought, the same snap judgements, I just never had to deal with it beyond rejecting the occasional friend.

You don't need to seek mine or anybody elses forgiveness, being gay myself and acting towards my own type the same way as you before I came out I can absolutely relate. But thankyou for your words, because you are an inspiration. Thank You.

nilfun - I wasn't offended in the slightest by your comments, unfortunately as in any community some people go off the deep end and become highly self destructive .. to say it's disturbing to witness is an understatement as you will know. I thank you for your words

AlanF - I think you sum up alot of issues many of us have, some people find it difficult and annoying how upset people are with Jehovah's Witnesses thinking that we blame everything that is wrong in our lives on them. The fact of the matter is it's a system set up that isn't suppose to fail its people. We are told that Jehovah is there for us when he clearly isn't. We have artical after artical about brothers and sisters helping and reaching out with a caring heart to single parent families. But sadly, for all of it supposed goodness in entirity not alot of good comes from it.

You should not have put Northern Girl's private message out for public inspection without her permission. That's a gross violation of privacy and one of the greatest "sins" you can commit on the Net. You should have simply summarized her silly comments.

I would have "summarized" her silly comments had what she sent to me been longer but as it stood sending such a message to me only provoked a response from me. I wanted that to be put where she felt uncomfortable .. clearly she didnt want to be flamed for such a stupid and uncaring view so she posted it privately to me who was in a clearly fragile state. I see nothing wrong with exposing those seeds of hurtfulness.

Such facts strongly show that "Biblical morality" is not based on fact, but on a 4000-year-old culture that is irrelevant in today's world. Such Biblical morality teaches that women are mere items of property, which illustrates how out of touch it is.

Such facts strongly show that "Biblical morality" is not based on fact, but on a 4000-year-old culture that is irrelevant in today's world. Such Biblical morality teaches that women are mere items of property, which illustrates how out of touch it is.

I agree, the bible contradicts itself way to often. How can the idea that an angel being desired by men in sodom but such a bad thing and yet Lot offers his daughter to the people so the angel will be left alone ? Why would the angel need such protection ? Why is it ok to get ones father drunk with the idea of having sexual relations with him ok ? And yet so many lesser things are condemned. The man that reached out to stop the Ark of the Covernant from tipping being killed for his lack of trust in Jehovah has always been shocking and disgusting to me. We have all been there when something like that might happen .. somthing drops and without a thought you reach out and grab for it. Our friend was doing the dishes just recently and the electric mixer dropped into the water and she reached straight in to get it without thinking .. it was still plugged into the wall lucky for her the wall plug was switched off. But the idea is the same kind of thing. Actually I could go on all day how the bible condemns this and that and then later says its ok if your certain people. Anyways thank you for your supportive comments. *hugz*

Hamas -

I'm pleased you have found a good life, Monkey. You certainly deserve it, my friend. This story shows just how narrow minded those Witnesses really are; or how we all were at one stage. I know I certainly was.

That narrow mindedness I think we all shared Hamas .. thank you.

Thank you all!

Josh

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

Your text was not bound by copyright northern girl .. and to be honest I was disgusted that after I bared my heart you were to Private Message me about how you think I need a reality check.

Grow a heart or a brain .. seriously!

monk3y

263

Growing up a gay Jehovah's Witness (My Life Story)

by m0nk3y in

i feel the need to express how i feel and felt about my life as a gay man.

i was brought up from birth as a jehovahs witness.

this has played a major part in my life and it has been a real struggle to get past.

m0nk3y

I got this private message a little while ago and I thought it would be unfair not to add it to the thread.

Sent on 02-Jul-03 23:28 Jul 2, 2003
Sent By northern girl
Title Hi from northern girl
Message Don't take this personally but ANY true religion that follows bible principals cannot condone your lifestyle. Remember about false prophets tickling peoples ears at the time of the end? I think you sound like a very humane person who should really take a reality check ... northern girl ... (emailed you so I can't be considered a troll).

Northern Girl, you say I need a reality check ? Exactly where are you grounding that statement ? It would seem to me that you would be the one that needs a reality check. You ask me not to take what your saying personally and yet you are directing it towards my situation .. arn't you in fact asking me to do the impossible ? Even the fact that you didn't want to be seen as a troll brings yourself into alot of disrepute.

I'm not really going to censor the way I feel about people like you, I feel your a scared human being that hides behind religion to make your decisions .. not only that but you direct acidic language towards me and try to say with the other breath that I'm ok with you. Isn't that like saying "Northern Girl I really like you but on the other hand, I don't"

This was my story, I worded it as it happened to me and if you think that your TRUE religion is an excuse for the harsh and unloving way I was treated was godly and right then I feel sad for you. Because unlike me you are talking a blind language. You don't have the experience to base your knowledge on so instead you draw your knowledge from somthing sombody else said. Have you also read the scripture about the blind leading the blind ?

You also talk about "ANY true religion" .. exactly how many are there ? Isn't there only suppose to be one ? Perhaps my beliefs are the right beliefs and yours are just based on an old book that came from the middle east .. theres a great place to be diriving a loving attitude towards your fellow man.

I would prefer in the future that you keep your one dimensional comments to yourself and people like you. Because people like me have listened to that rubbish way to long and frankly don't want our time wasted with the dribble.

monk3y

Sent on	02-Jul-03 23:28 Jul 2, 2003
Sent By	northern girl
Title	Hi from northern girl
Message	Don't take this personally but ANY true religion that follows bible principals cannot condone your lifestyle. Remember about false prophets tickling peoples ears at the time of the end? I think you sound like a very humane person who should really take a reality check ... northern girl ... (emailed you so I can't be considered a troll).