happyout

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Posts by happyout

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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

  1. social
  2. current

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  Frannie,

  It is sort of a hard call with so much "classical" literature having racist terminology. I wish I had a good answer, but I don't. If you are not a minority, it may be impossible to understand how those terms can harm. Not that I think anyone should be mollycoddled, but I also don't think they should be demeaned. Things were very different just a short while ago, and the words that were accepted then aren't now. I'm sure it's harder, especially for the elderly (not that you are) to keep up with all the changes.

  And we are in 100% agreement on wishing that racial designations weren't used all the time. I don't know why it's always such a big deal. And I don't understand why all the changes ( I doubt you will ever hear me refer to myself as "African American") except that it is kind of an indication of a people in transition. For so long, so many minorities were made to feel inferior, and now I think some of them (blacks, latinos come to mind the fastest) are trying to shape their own descriptions. I understand the why, just not the path.

  Sometimes it is important to classify race, and also gender, just to understand the full situation. As in medical conditions, so called "racial profiling" , etc. I have no issue with that, and want to see those statistics used for the betterment (if there is such a word) of society.

  Anyway, nice to see that two such "different" looking people can be on the same basic page, huh?

  Happyout
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  25

  Do you address people by their "religious" titles?

  by happyout in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  even though i have been out of the borg for over a decade, when i run into an older witness, i sometimes still slip and say brother or sister so and so.. i was married by a baptist minister, and my husband insists that i address him as reverend.

  this tends to make me a tad uncomfortable, although i don't know why.. when i lost my daughter, the hospital chaplain came by, and i easily referred to him as father, and never thought twice about it.

  i know there were a lot more important things on my mind, but i wondered about it later.. what about you?

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  happyout

  Even though I have been out of the Borg for over a decade, when I run into an older witness, I sometimes still slip and say brother or sister so and so.

  I was married by a baptist minister, and my husband insists that I address him as Reverend. This tends to make me a tad uncomfortable, although I don't know why.

  When I lost my daughter, the hospital chaplain came by, and I easily referred to him as Father, and never thought twice about it. I know there were a lot more important things on my mind, but I wondered about it later.

  What about you? If you run into someone who has "earned" their religious title, do you use it? How does it make you feel?

  Happyout
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  6

  WHY??!! A (Non-God/Bible/Religion) Question...

  by AGuest in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  is it that... (may you all have peace!)....

  ... some drivers, when wishing to make a turn or change lanes... wait until the very moment right before the turn/change... to put on their signal light to indicate their intent... or fail to even use it at all... and then get upset and honk all crazy-like (which, for me, sometimes scares the bee-jeezus outta me!)...

  when others fail to see their intent?.

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  happyout

  Hi, SJ,

  I am also a California driver, and I will give you one reason I signal late. Because in the days when I was trying to be a "nice" driver, and I would signal far in advance a whopping 99% of the time the driver in the other lane would speed up so I could not change. It got to the point where I would almost miss my off ramp.

  So, not to in any way imply that you are wrong for being irritated, that's just my reason. And, let me add, I NEVER cut other people off when I change lanes, I am always very safe.

  Happyout (who is usually irritated with California drivers, too)
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

  1. social
  2. current

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  Six,

  I spoke with my mom (who is a teacher) about this, and asked her what she thought. She said it is very common in many school discussions she has been part of for people to imply that minority students are somehow less intelligent than whites. She works in what is now a largely latino area, and she said many of her white counterparts say things like, "you know THEY don't learn as well" or "THEY don't care about education". I am trying not to impose my thoughts on what may have been in this particular teacher's mind, but I have a difficult time believing she really didn't know the term "Sambo" is a slur.

  I know what you mean about comedy clubs, but I think 90% of what I have heard in them would be inappropriate in an academic environment, don't you agree?

  Maybe I just take this stuff too seriously because of the potential damage to children, I don't know. Or, maybe I am sick of politics and the like because of the California recall (since I live in CA), and her lame excuse sounded like Gray Davis . I would likely have had much less of a reaction if she had simply admitted her mistake without throwing in the somewhat unbelievable "didn't know what it meant"

  Happyout (who is willing to admit this is one of her buttons)
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

  1. social
  2. current

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  Frannie,

  I understand what you mean by generational issues. Once when I was renting an apartment, the landlady (who was 90 if she was a day) reminisced fondly about another "colored" tenant she had had. I took it in stride, knowing she meant no harm.

  Again, however, I feel the circumstances are different. This lady is a teacher, and such terms should not "slip out". If she said this "unknowingly" in a seminar, what other types of things is she saying in the classroom to impressionable?

  Sorry if I seem to be beating a dead horse, I am just tired of people saying things that are inappropriate, and then getting put on "paid leave" . How is that a punishment? I would love to have paid leave. How about some sensitivity training? How about some cultural awareness?

  Happyout
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  While I may agree that we often say things we don't mean when we are angry or in a heated discussion, this lady was teaching a class. She was not arguing, or trying to defend her position. There is no indication that anyone was challenging her in any way. What could possibly have been her motivation?

  And, again, where had she ever heard this term if it was not in a demeaning fashion? I may not understand every slur out there, but I can darn sure tell when one is implied.

  The fact that she is a teacher further adds to the gravity. If she makes this kind of statement with no provocation, what else may she be saying, possibly to her students?

  Happyout
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  Ok, for some reason, it won't paste. Please see this story:

  http://www.cnn.com/2003/EDUCATION/09/19/sambo.remark.ap/index.html

  I am at a loss to understand how something like that could “slip out without thinking”. As for the teacher’s explanation that she didn’t know the term “Sambo” was a slur, I would have to ask in what context she had ever heard the word used. And why use that particular phrase? What did she think it meant?

  Maybe I am being too harsh, but I don’t understand the whole “slipped out” phenomenon. Anyone care to enlighten me?

  Happyout
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

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  2. current

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  Let me try that again (cute come back, IG)
  

  I just read the following article:

  this is showing when I type it in, but keeps disappearing when I hit submit. I am going to try re-posting it

  Happyout
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  37

  Do words that "just slip out" reflect true feelings?

  by happyout in

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  i just read the following article:

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  happyout

  I just read the following article:
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  9

  Brian's Exodus from the JWs - Part TWO

  by Funchback in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  part i is here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/58849/1.ashx

  again, this is a re-post from march 2002. however, i have some exciting updates that will be revealed within a few days!

  my mom was studying with a woman named cheryl who lived around the corner from us.

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  happyout

  great story, can't wait to read more

  bttt

  Happyout