As parents sometimes the best thing we can do is listen. It’s big that he feels comfortable enough to be open about his feelings with you.
Hopefully getting things off his chest is part of his healing and growth. Overtime hopefully he we get to understand why you did things your way and that you did the best with what you had.
It was a gamble, you placed your bets where you thought the odds were in you and your family’s favor.
Thanks for sharing. Reading the OP feels like reading about my life now. I started waking up about 5 years ago. My youngest is 21 now. All three of my children were having regular bible studies on the path to baptism, going out in field service regularly. My oldest was ready to get baptized just because of the pressure from family and “knowing it was the right thing to do”.
As of today, none are baptized, the two oldest are working full time and attending college part time, one is living with their significant other and doesn’t attend, the other is still with us. The youngest (21 yrs) is going into their senior year in college.
To me, this is good and seems to be worth it, as I’m not sure I could’ve helped from outside the organization. I feel that by staying in, I was able to help soften the blow, be more of an advocate for them and divert the pressure put on them by family members.
At the same time, I know, and I’m reminded after reading the OP and some of the others’ posts that each day I stay in and allow them to stay in mentally, no matter how well my intentions are may not be viewed the same as I do and could possibly be resented by them.