Kate, BoC, thank you for the supportive words.
Kate, I don't feel like doing anything silly right now but I have since gotten in touch with a treatment center that specializes in this kind of addiction. I have the hot-line on standby.
BoC, slowing down the rate of chemical decent was the very first thing they suggested. I was going WAY too fast in my enthusiasm to be rid of this.
Here again, I am disappointed with the doctor who prescribed it for at least not giving me a number to call for counseling on this. All he said was that I was going to have withdrawals and gave me a prescription for another 60 pills at half the strength I was taking and told me to step it down.
I had no idea about the side effects. I had to google them. When this depression thing hit me... I mean it was like a ton of bricks and I just knew the only way out was to die.
I feel a little more stable now. I have upped my pills to a more reasonable level, considering where I started, and I now have a plan of action.
Thank you guys for chiming in on this. It means a lot.