Nice to see some familiar posters here even now. : )
I wonder, though, if jgnats is still around?
ohnightdivine
JoinedPosts by ohnightdivine
-
58
Do You Ever Wonder Where Certain Posters Are?
by minimus indo people simply leave because the site has given them what they wanted?
are they now infrequent lurkers?.
did they go back to the watchtower?.
-
-
-
42
Hello Everyone, Another JW Has Left!
by SuperGirl injust want to introduce myself and let you know that this site is working and is a big help to lots of jws with doubts.
i've been lurking for about a year, the first couple of times i was frightened and literally shaking visiting an apostate site but it's the only place i can come to for sanity.
the religion has become a nut house.
-
-
ohnightdivine
I am sooo happy for you, SuperGirl! Congratulations and I wish you more happiness in your freedom with the people you love and who love you for who you are!
-
27
My story
by Leeny ini came across this website when i was looking for some emotional/mental support lately as i was summoned by elders to explain someone’s report on me saying “i’m promoting homosexuality”.
i’m inactive, not attending meetings or associating with jw outside of my biological family for almost 2 years now.. yes i am gay (you can judge away) and yes it is in a direct contrast to the scriptures, no arguement about it.. i was brought up in a jw family.
my dad is a typical zealot, he literally talks or thinks about the bible 24/7.
-
-
ohnightdivine
Dear Leeny,
Welcome to this forum. We've been through many quite similar feelings as you've been, although in different situations. Please do not lose hope. Listen to your heart, and head. I think that we were born to make full use of the knowledge, skills, talents, our physical make up for something great and honorable as long as we are not harming anyone.
Feel free to share your thoughts, any challenges you experience -- it doesn't end so easily, especially when you are born into a JW family. I'm the only convert / baptized one in my family but it's not that easy to shake off the "invisible" shackles that seem to be there in front of us.
Anyhow, I hope you can find your own place soon and lead your own life. Our lives are precious. Without freedom, it becomes void of meaning and happiness...
Hugs from Asia.
OND
-
32
Ridiculous Picture!
by Iamallcool inhttps://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/watchtower-study-january-2019/do-not-be-anxious-i-am-your-god/.
.
-
-
ohnightdivine
Portraying everyone else as villains! WTH. GB members should just disappear and go straight to their own 'paradise'.
-
27
JW marketing image
by neat blue dog inpicture from a recent watchtower:.
what diversity.
what corporate synergy.
-
-
ohnightdivine
I could spot only around 3 to 4 "genuine" smiles among the 12.
-
31
Favorite Classical Pieces, Sonatas, Concertos, Etudes etc...
by blondie in... filling in holes in my cds.
give me composer, work, key if possible.
-
-
ohnightdivine
A recent discovery for me. Makes me want to get up and dance and sway my head from side to side
And
-
23
Did you enjoy your visit to Bethel?
by Addison0998 ini recently had to take a trip with my family to bethel.
it was a bit torturous for a secret apostate as you can imagine.
but mostly just so boring.
-
-
ohnightdivine
No. It felt all stuffy in there. I was invited a few times by some Bethel dwellers to their rooms and I remembered being quite impressed about their fairly modern living spaces compared to typical residential areas in this country. Thick carpets, cool shoes drawers. But the air was so stale. The hallways were pretty dark.
Fast forward to the recent years I've also been invited a few times to see "Sophia and Caleb". Lol. I never went, though. Most adult JWs I know seemed to enjoy taking pictures with the 2 cardboard figures more than their kids did, from what I saw on their Facebook posts.
-
39
What Are The Differences Between JWs Born In and Converted?
by minimus ini tend to think that many jws who joined the religion in their later years feel foolish or are embarrassed by their decision to become one of jehovah’s witnesses.
.
i’m not embarrassed by my years “in the truth “ because i was raised from infancy to believe everything was god’s word and who are we to question jehovah and his organization?
-
-
ohnightdivine
I was quite lonely in college, away from my family, and met a JW. I felt genuinely "cared" for, and I also sincerely cared for the person in return. Eventually got baptized after so many years of doubting whether the religion really had the truth.
I KNEW about the UN hypocrisy, child abuse, etc. and due to my shock and disappointment I even printed out the internet articles and showed it to my Bible study conductor. But I was told that there is no perfect organization and that Jehovah would solve everything in his time. I already felt so alone because of all that cognitive dissonance but I guess I had what people call the "sunk cost" mentality. I already spent so many years "studying" with them. I made many "friends" with them. And nobody was outright telling me to do something bad. So I figured that as long as I focused on the good sides of the teachings 'based' from the Bible, then I wouldn't have any trouble.
Fast forward to around 7 years later, and because I was also busy with work, I never really became deeply indoctrinated. I guess I stayed for the association. That 'warm' feeling you get after each meeting when you talked to almost everyone, have dinner together afterwards, even talk about work together. Something like that.
But I already felt something was just wrong with the org. Those became magnified during WT studies. I was able to read between the lines. Even reading the WT texts literally gave me some goosebumps because the guilt-mongering was so obvious. They started asking for more, more, and more money. All this "ARE YOU DOING ENOUGH?" stuff.
Add to that the hypocrisy I observed around me. Bethel people, special pioneers, regular pioneers, all the "special people" coming from WT being treated like celebrities wherever they go. All the bling bling I saw. And then they tried to portray hard-working office-working people as 'selfish' individuals. But among the JWs, well-to-do brothers and sisters also associated most of the time with other well-to-do brothers and sisters. You still saw the social hierarchies. When you get sick, you get a visit. But of course, you have to pay for your hospitalization yourself. It's a simple matter. And it makes me sick how they encourage many to give almost all that they have to the organization--but when the time comes that they need it, especially when they become seriously ill, they are instead told to seek help from their 'wordly' relatives. I saw these things in my few years within the organization.
I joined the 'preaching' work before but I also felt disgusted by the inefficiency of the process. How it makes you harbor this 'ulterior motive' to be nice to people with the intention of converting them later. Recording time. Another stuff that made me felt sick.
Another observation is that I felt depressed most of the time when I started engaging with JWs.
The list goes on and on... but I am just thankful that I have my non-JW family who gives me the sense of normalcy and balance after years with the organization. My family doesn't know my experiences and how hurt I was, which I think is good. I am able to live my life with more positivity. To the lurkers and born-in JWs here, not all 'worldly' people are bad. There are so many beautiful people and things out there.
I am not totally DA or DF. I still attend from time to time, just for the association. It isn't making me 100% free, I know. But I guess my personality (right now) predisposes me to stick with 'long-time friends'. I hope I can be more at peace in the future.
-
26
What was the last thing you said to your jw family?
by caves in7 years ago i had my last conversation with the toxic jw that mostly raised me.
every conversation was toxic for my entire adult life with her.
the last time we spoke was right before the memorial 7 years ago and she was laying on the usual heavy guilt and fear mongering about how jeho counts his people at the memorial.
-
-
ohnightdivine
Oh my. I'm so sorry to hear about all your experiences.
Sometimes when I read something like this, it makes me stop for a while and thank the heavens that I am the only one in the family who became a JW, even though for so many years I felt a bit lonely because I had no one to talk to in my family regarding my beliefs and the eventual period of anger and depression.
I am just thankful I am able to get back to a "normal" family life and not discuss anything related to Armageddon, etc.
-
-
-
ohnightdivine
We are angry because we cared.
We are angry because we felt we were cared for.
We are angry because we care for those who are left behind.