I empathize with you totally!!! I had a post a few months ago about my sister's wedding with a very similar experience. I was shunned by my entire family and their spouse's except for my mother and unbaptized sister. She is the one who was getting married.
I told my mother it only made me resolve even more to stay away from the organization. I told her that if that was the kind of love that the org. gave it wasn't the right religion for me. God is love! I would rather do without my family than to go back to the "UNTRUTH" so that maybe my parents and the rest of my family will see that I will not give in to the shunning. Instead, hopefully they will see that the shunning backfires and causes more people to stay out of the organization than returning to it. It is ASSinine to even treat a fellow human being with such cruelty as shunning.
I have resolved in my heart and mind to be who I am. I know with this decision that my family will continue to shun me. However, I am much happier with myself to be who I am than to be something fake. I would be lying to myself if I returned to the org. and I will not cheat myself or my children of the real person that I am. I view it as my family's loss, not mine. Yes, I do miss them sometimes but, I have my own life and I would not trade my true self for anything false.
I hope I have helped you a bit with my own experience. I will say that YOU need to do what is right for YOU no matter what decision you make. If that decision is to go back into the org and it is right for YOU than that will be the right decision. If you choose to stay out and explore your true self then that will be the right decision. What I am trying to say is, don't worry about what others think of any decision you make. Even if in time you felt the decision is the wrong one, you will realize it and learn from it.
Best wishes to you. I know what you are going through.