You're right.
I've never thought of it that way! Thanks Minimus!
*goes away feeling good about self*
Posts by Piph
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22Did You Believe Either You Were Being "Blessed" or Being "Disciplined"?
by minimus in.
many jws feel that either god is blessing them or allowing them persecution or in fact causing discipline upon them.
what did you think when something good or bad happened to you??
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25
Saying "hi" leads to love and leaving your wife...
by kitties_and_horses_oh_my! ini've been struggling so much with some old programming that i truly feel is from the witnesses, and my father in particular.
he always told me men and women couldn't be friends -- unless they were married or related -- because they'd fall in love with each other and leave their mates.
that's why you could only be friends with your own gender and were never allowed to be alone with someone of the opposite sex, even in a car.
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Piph
Kitties! *muah!* ((((hugs))))
I was thinking the same thing as Princess and LittleToe while I was reading this thread...focusing on your own friendships and making friends with guys could help. Because you'll be learning to see things from the other side, you know...I think that one of the most insidious JW tactics is teaching the idea that we can't trust ourselves. Not only hearing it constantly from the platform, seeing it pervading the lives of all the people you knew, but even getting it drilled into your head on a regular basis by your own father has got to make the healing that much more difficult. :( The idea that we can't control our actions and we can't control our decisions and all our feelings are bad...bleh. It's just wrong, but we know that. ;)
I think that in being able to forge a close friendships with members of the opposite sex would be a great healing (I'm working on that one too...actually, for slightly different reasons) beacuse you would be able to see and experience first hand that the teachings were wrong. Relearning and reprogramming your brain with reality, instead of disaster-thinking. Learning to trust yourself. Trusting yourself makes trusting others a piece of cake. :)
And for those times when you're up late and all alone with scary thoughts at 3 a.m....feel compassion for yourself, because you've been through a lot of pain you don't deserve...and you're doing great. :-)
****LOTS OF LOVE AND HUGS****
Talk to you later sweetie!!
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25
no meetings this week
by missy04 ini feel kind of silly posting next to you guys who were in the organization for much longer, like i know what i'm talking about or something, lol, i don't.. but i think it's really sad..all of these people, mostly really good people, who spend their whole lives or at least alot of it trying to do things..field service, studying, giving talks, giving up good jobs, ect.
for this religion.
i am really sad that i can't just save 'em from it.. i haven't been to any meetings this week and i think i finally might have the guts to tell them i'm done.. wow, it must have been realllllyyyy hard for all those who have family in the org.
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Piph
:(
Hi Missy
Just wanted to let you know that I really relate to what you're going through...
My closest friend...ever...stopped talking to me or spending time with me after I left the Witnesses (last year), after a short period of furtive emails. We were better than sisters...I really don't think I'll ever meet anyone like her again.
At first the ache was intense and constant...I cried a lot and mooned over her for many months. But after a while, I was able to think about the goodness we shared and realized that even the best of friends drift apart some times. I retain hope that someday she'll see the light and come find me...she knows I'm always here for her if she needs me. Right now her idea of God is what keeps her together, and she really doesn't understand or 'get' how I can be happy without him. (Her pity for me is so strong right now...I actually feel it's best she stay away until she heals further...I don't like being treated with pity, especially since I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. )
Anyway. Losing someone that beauiful and precious...especially for such an insignificant reason...hurts really deeply. It helps to make new friends but that takes time, and no one really can replace someone like that who clicks with you on such a deep level. Even so, healing is in sight. Promise.
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22
Did You Believe Either You Were Being "Blessed" or Being "Disciplined"?
by minimus in.
many jws feel that either god is blessing them or allowing them persecution or in fact causing discipline upon them.
what did you think when something good or bad happened to you??
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Piph
Oh, I was sure I was always the center of Jehover's attention...LOL
In the past couple of years when I was still a JW, I was getting in trouble with the elders a lot...or it seemed like a lot...it was actually only two or three times but the sheer trauma of it was enough to make it seem like a constant thing. That's when my belief that something bad happening to me meant I was being tested...was tested. I really couldn't see how God could let something so obviously traumatizing happen to me when it was supposed to be HIM helping me through the elders.
(Of course I brain-washed myself out of that one when I made the connection that I was just like Job and the elders were "false comforters"...it's amazing the lengths children [emotionally stunted people] will go through to keep their parent [the idea of God] perfect in their eyes.)
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8
Hypoallergenic cats now for sale....
by Elsewhere inhttp://www.cnn.com/2004/tech/10/27/biotechnology.cats/index.html genetically modified cats for sale
(cnn) -- a california biotechnology company has started taking orders for a hypoallergenic cat for pet lovers prone to allergies.
the genetically engineered feline, which is expected to be available from 2007, is the first in a planned series of lifestyle pets, los angeles-based allerca said in a press release.. allerca hopes to attract customers among the millions of people worldwide who suffer from cat allergies.. up to 10 percent of the u.s. population alone are believed to be prone to symptoms that can affect the eyes, nose, ears, throat, lungs and skin.. many cat lovers ignore medical advice and discomfort and choose to keep the animals as pets, or use expensive medications to cope with their allergies.. cat allergen is also one of the main causes of childhood allergies, asthma and other respiratory diseases such as bronchitis.. cat allergies are caused by a potent protein secreted by the cat's skin and salivary glands.
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Piph
Cool! If only I was rich...
I adore kitties, if only my nose did too.
I've read that cats like Scottish Folds, American Wirehairs, Maine Coons, Sphynx (aka hairless), and the Devon and Cornish Rex are hypoallergenic for a lot of people who are allergic, but not all of them, unfortunately. Any one of those are cheaper than the fully hypoallergenic kind!
Maybe I should just have my nose removed.
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28
Did you read the book "1984" of Georges Orwell?
by Nicolas inthis book is one of the best book i've ever read.
it describe well the technics that the watchtower use to manipulate their jehovah's witness.
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Piph
Oooh...I've been wondering if the movie is any good. I'm gonna have to rent it!!
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28
Did you read the book "1984" of Georges Orwell?
by Nicolas inthis book is one of the best book i've ever read.
it describe well the technics that the watchtower use to manipulate their jehovah's witness.
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Piph
Whew, just finished reading it a few minutes ago. I think I read almost the whole second half today.
Euph and I had already talked a lot about the concept of doublespeak, but another concept of the book that really hit me (that I hadn't heard of before, unlike doublespeak) was crimestop. The idea of actually stunting your thinking process to keep from grasping logic. Training your brain to keep from being able to concentrate for too long on really deep things. That really hit me hard because I can see how that's something that's really affected me...I can't wait to go to college to loosen up my neurons a bit.
I'm just feeling overwhelmed by it all right now. It's amazing how deeply it goes when so many things have affected you subconsciously. Yuck.
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19
Words JWs--and ex-JWs--use :)
by bebu in(preface: i have never been a jw.
i notice words and phrases that strike me really odd, used by jws, and even by members on this board.
one that comes readily to mind is the use of the words one or ones when referring to people.
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Piph
I can't stand the JW terminology...it just serves to set all JWs apart as being different than other people...
My husband and I use the phraseology as a mutual joke between us sometimes...words that always grated on me, like "happified" or "wholesome"...who says wholesome unless they're talking about bread??
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24
You know you're an apostate when... Or, My first Jack-o'-lantern!
by seattleniceguy inthat's right, that's right, i carved my first jack-o'-lantern!
it was much more easier than i thought it would be, and much more fun, too!
i don't think i did too shabby for my first try, but i definitely picked up some valuable insights by observing my roommate and her awesome cat-o'-lantern.
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Piph
Do you put a tealight candle in or a votive?
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24
You know you're an apostate when... Or, My first Jack-o'-lantern!
by seattleniceguy inthat's right, that's right, i carved my first jack-o'-lantern!
it was much more easier than i thought it would be, and much more fun, too!
i don't think i did too shabby for my first try, but i definitely picked up some valuable insights by observing my roommate and her awesome cat-o'-lantern.
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Piph
Silly double poster woman!