shallow men

by Ellie 63 Replies latest jw friends

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow
    NORMAN MEREDITH: The contradiction is they expect men to have very good communication skills but to be maybe like their girlfriends but then, at the same time, they want the man to be tough and provide security.

    I couldn't read all of the transcript. I will comment on this though. I am finding, with my current sweetheart, that men and women can communicate. This is a delightful surprise. Not all men are emotionally distant and cold stone walls when it comes to communicating with women.. And yes, most of us women want the men in our lives to have backbone and to know how to assert themselves. People, men or women, who stand up for themselves and those they love, will get more respect.

    You fellows have to admit that an awful lot of men make it a point to go on and on about big breasts. This does affect women's ideas of what men want. Even women with large breasts can feel self conscious if their breasts aren't firm and shaped nicely. Why? Because Playboy and like magazines high light those kinds of breasts.

    I've noticed that if you look through the list of member created chatrooms on AOL, even the gay men's chatrooms can be very specific about anatomy. And if you look at the profiles of the gay men, often they describe themselves in great detail. They give hair and eye color, height, weight, etc. They tell you whether they are hairy or smooth and they will even give you the measurement of their members in inches. They know there are men who are looking specifically for what they have.

    I don't usually watch Dr. Phil, but today I did. There was a man on who is 30 and is still a virgin. He has this specific woman in mind, even wrote her a letter ten years ago. He's never met her and doesn't even know if she truly exists. But she is his soulmate/dream woman and he is saving himself for her and being loyal to her. He's decided that her name is Sara, she's blonde and is a beauty queen. He's so fixated on this fantasy woman that he tells every woman he dates that she doesn't measure up to Sara.

    What the world needs if for men who aren't picky, and who just really want to be loved, to speak up more loudly than the shallow men. This would help the cause of men a lot. We girls would benefit greatly, too.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5
    So, you are 25? And you don't like it that men like to think of you sexually? Well, we all take our beauty for granted in our 20's. We dismiss the power it brings us. But in about 20 years, when things are not in the same place and you are starting to feel as if you are getting your middle age look, your opinion will change.

    Youre right Robyn. When I was in my 20's I got so much attention it was crazy. Do I miss it. Sometimes, but then I remember the moments of intense loneliness. Those men who were chasing me didnt want a long-term relationship. I got burned out and wanted more. Thankfully I met my husband when I was 26 and married him at 27. Being 40 now I am so glad I'm married (not to putdown any of the happily single ones out there) things have moved, shifted, gotten a tad bigger, fallen, hell this aint a 25 year old body but my husband seems to be happy with me the way I am and that's a good thing.

    Still getting chased by the hubby,

    Josie

  • funkyderek
    funkyderek

    FinallyFree:

    I'm interested in a girl who will bring home a paycheque, cook, clean, and cater to my every whim. Doing it quietly is a bonus.

    If men weren't concerned about breasts, we'd all demand a woman like that, and then where would we all be?

  • AuldSoul
    AuldSoul

    FHN,

    who just really want to be loved

    I don't think it is fair to infer that men who are emotionally attuned and very open with communication cannot have preferences when it comes to physical appearance. I can't stand the way Pamela Anderson looks, for instance, even though I like the way large breasts look. She looks like a stick carrying two LARGE cantaloupes, it isn't attractive to me. Does that make me shallow?

    I prefer the appearance of girls with some meat on them. I know guys who prefer the appearance of girls with a LOT of meat on them and a lot of fluff too. I know guys who like walking sticks with canatloupes. I know guys who prefer champagne glasses. I know guys (and I'm one of them) for whom a pretty neckline is a huge turn-on.

    But, I am emotionally available to my wife. I communicate openly and deeply on any issue she wants to talk about. I bring up deep issues I want to talk about. So, I don't think I am shallow just because I prefer the appearance of certain physical attributes. I am a human animal. I have certain responses genetically programmed in. Other responses are acquired responses. The trick is to find someone who really sees and appreciates both how you look and the person in the packaging.

    In my opinion, anyway.

    AuldSoul

  • G Money
    G Money

    I´m glad you blokes like a lass with meat on her bones. That means more slender ones for me!

    I´m not a boob guy, could care less, rather have her with small ones than huge ones smackin my face during our exercise times.

    I like women with great bodies who know how to use them. That is the way to hook me. I´ve dated a few with P0rn star bodies, slender and perfect and one or two or more knew how to use them and wow! I loved it!

    I just don´t get turned on by ones who limop or waddle. Call me Shallow Hal, no wait, he was chunky and looks like his grandma dressed him!

  • Rayvin
    Rayvin

    My husband is very into breasts. Sometimes I feel like I am just there watching an affair between my husband and my chest. lol

    He even said the other day .. to my comment of I don't want to get fat.. " I don't mind if you gained more weight..you would get bigger boobs.. right?"

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5
    My husband is very into breasts. Sometimes I feel like I am just there watching an affair between my husband and my chest. lol

    lol yeah I can relate to that.

  • jt stumbler
    jt stumbler

    Its not the size of the chest that matters......

    Its really how much of the chest you can size.

    Jtstumbler of the "shallow he-mans women lovers club"

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow
    So, I don't think I am shallow just because I prefer the appearance of certain physical attributes. I am a human animal.

    I don't think it's shallow to prefer to be with someone you personally find attractive. Unless that's the only reason you are with her/him.

    We aren't attracted to everyone we meet. I like big expressive eyes that pop out. I've also seen some beautiful eyes that were small and deepset. I don't often see a man who turns my head and makes me say wow. But when I do, he is never the same type of guy. They all look different. And someone can be very good looking technically, but have no charisma. I think this is probably why some guys don't find Pamela Anderson attractive. She's vapid and tries too hard to be "sexy". A truly sexy person doesn't have to try at all, they just are. You have it or you don't.

  • dezpbem
    dezpbem

    I personally look to the person she really is in her heart and mind. I don't care if she has the biggest boobs and everything else a man could want in a woman's body if she's lacking in those 2 above. They come before all else. I don't want to paint an overly broad generalization but most women i've met whjo had too much in the looks department were really lacking in the rest. I'm sure there are exceptions.

    Here's a funny dating story that happened recently to me. I was interested in a woman who didn't hae a pretty face, was overweight, had a small chest...basically wasn't appealing physically. But on the inside I thought shes wonderful. I really liked her...and when I told her I found out she didn't like me because of my looks! Hahaha! In the end I find it funny that I didn't judge her for her looks but she was focused on mine. Oh well, in the end I guess she was more shallow than I thought. Goes to show you that it isn't just men who judge by the external.

    Dez

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