Good Comebacks - Any Help?

atypical

Hi everyone,

I am trying to do the "fade" for the sake of my wife and family, but it is getting extremely difficult. My wife's cong. is even more nosy than most. When I do show up at the occasional meeting, I get assaulted with questions and usually end up at a loss for words. This week is CO visit at the hall and so I am trying to work up the determination to show up with my wife (even though I know it will encourage everyone to say:"oh, look who showed up for CO visit".

The main one I always get is: "I haven't seen you in forever. What's going on with you?" I've thought about using the watchtower cd-rom and printing out an article that says not to make such comments, and then handing out copies to anyone who gives me a problem. But, as I said, I am trying hard not to attract attention. I know probably most on this board have been through similar problems; anyone have good verbiage that worked for them?

Thanks

Atypical

daystar

Best be elusive. *Smile* "Keeping on, keeping on!"

I can recall, after I quit the meetings, trying to contact an old JW friend of mine. I called his parents' house and got his father on the phone. He asked how I was doing and I answered "Great! How are you and [your wife] doing?" He answered "well" and then asked "How are you doing spiritually?" To which I said "Outstanding, actually." He sounded so happy to hear this and went on about meetings and such. I interrupted politely,"I'm sorry. No, Brother [friend's dad]. I don't go to meetings anymore. But that doesn't change anything. I've got an excellent relationship with Jehovah God."

Well, he didn't take too kindly to that. Perhaps he thought I had tricked him. His attitude changed immediately. He became very short with me and disconnected the call.

Best to be elusive if you really want to keep the peace.

blondie

Come in separate vehicles and come just as the meeting starts. Sing the song by the exit and leave quickly after the last word of the prayer is said. Get in your car, lock the doors and leave.

If you do linger, you aren't obligated to answer any questions. If asked a nosy question, say "excuse me" softly and walk away to talk to someone you feel safe with. If it is a sister head for the men's room. Or change the subject to something non-JW you know they are interested in: traveling, fishing, shopping, sports, movies, etc.

But don't come too early if or linger too long, I suggest about 5 minutes, long enough for your wife to pickup any literature/magazines.

Blondie

atypical

Thanks, Daystar. That is good advice. I guess that's the hardest thing to do; saying little. But being quick with too many details would only give them fodder for gossip or worse.

carla

If you get cornered just answer fine, fine, enough about me tell me..... keep turning back to them. Most people love to talk about themselves.

twinflame

Guess my excuse, or at least the one my husband used for me, would not work.....menopause!

You could always use depression since most there either do or have suffered from it. That can sure take away motivation for everything.

undercover

"I haven't seen you in forever. What's going on with you?"

I've had similar comments made to me when I show for the rare meeting. No matter what my answer is I try to have a happy attitude at all times, even when someone gets too nosy.

They're indoctrinated to believe that if they were to try to live life without Jehovah( read "the WTS") they would be miserable. But then when a "weak" person shows up every once in a while and they act happy and unworried about being seen as "weak" it bothers them and confuses them.

So I usually ignore nosy comments and rude statements and act like I'm happy to be there and glad to see them, but hey, don't expect to see me every week...this is a treat for them, I've got a real life to live away from the nuttiness.

The worst I've done when someone asked too personal a question was to quickly say, looking them dead in the eye, "It's none of your business". That usually ends conversations pretty quick. They'll find some "friend" who just walked in that they need to talk to.

metatron

Annoy the hell out of them! - put on your best smile and say "having fun!" or "being happy!"

Remember, their pushy questions are just a facade for asking why you don't attend or why you don't really believe.

Be a shining example of someone who is drifting away - and genuinely joyful about it! Yippee!

metatron

garybuss

Whenever I need a few seconds, I introduce myself. If they keep coming, I ask them their names. Rolling the eyes while blowing a spit bubble buys time. If you are a man, cut a hole in your pants pocket and bring a finger out of your fly. Take off your glasses and hang them on the finger. Start a new spit bubble.

Darth Yhwh

garybuss, that might work for strangers but if these people are familiar with you then they're going to think your off your rocker.

Good Comebacks - Any Help?

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