Do Any Atheists Feel This Way?

by Big Dog 51 Replies latest jw friends

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  Mysterious

  The inherent difficulty with atheism does in fact exist in just the way you've outlined. While religion often serves as the opiate of the masses atheism has no similar comfort to offer. It does not propose answers to unanswerable questions, it does not hold out hope where there was none before and it doesnt promise to hold people's hands through difficulties.

  So yes, finally coming to terms with the fact that there is in fact no god and no afterlife can be very disconcerting and disheartening. And not only does it provide no hope, but the very knowledge that is now part of you for the most part prevents people from going back to the religious comfort they had known previously; their former comfort inextricably linked to a faith now deeply shaken.

  Erikson, famous for his work on life stage development, mentioned two of his later stages that I find striking of those that have come into atheism as well. Namely Generativity vs Stagnation which he said was characterized by an interest in the welfare of ensuing generations and thereby seeking to leave a legacy for oneself, as well as Integrity vs Despair which entailed reflecting on one's life with satisfaction and learning to accept death as but one facet of human existance.

  So while initially it his hard to accept the loss of self associated with death, it is an important life stage that can be realized in time. But like adapating to any life view it is not something that can just be adopted overnight. And certainly going from a realm of comfort to a domain that promises no such thing is anything less than easy.

  My condolences on the loss of your father and my sincere wishes that you find peace in your life.
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  kiddotan

  
  
  
  Big Dog: my apologies for being thick.

  for you too Darth

  My son died in my arms last year also, i have a little understanding. I have his memories.

  But don't have a need for a god to blame, nor to fall back on. For me this works.

  Mysterious is describes what it is for those of strange enough to except nothingness
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  Robert K Stock

  As long as I live my life for myself and do the best I can with what I've got it does not make me sad to know that when I die that is the end.

  They are cliches but true, "You only go around once so grab all the gusto you can" and "I did it my way"

  This Atheist has no fear of death and my only regret is how many years I wasted in relgious belief.
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  doofdaddy

  IMO this is the down side of knowing that there is no god. It appears that early humans created an after life as a counter to the horror of nonexistance.

  Religion, let's face it , is all about denying the reality of death.

  A religion that doesn't have a hope of an after life has no followers.

  To me life is a circle. We come in hairless, toothless and totally in the care of loved ones. That's how we leave. Our 70 or 80 yrs is all about preparing for this time.

  As others have said, enjoy the ride!!!

  Yes, children dying is the most tragic experience
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  Dazz_C

  http://www.ebonmusings.org/atheism/lifeofwonder.html I believe that atheism implies freedom. I believe that, while it does not give our lives meaning or purpose in and of itself, neither does it deny the possibility of these things. It is the right of every human being to steer their own course, to decide what makes their existence meaningful and what their purpose in life should be, and within reason, atheism can accommodate whatever we choose. I believe that our minds and our emotions are completely real and no less valuable because they come from our material brains rather than imaginary immaterial souls. I believe that life is inherently valuable, full of grandeur, mystery, beauty and complexity, a thing to be cherished, protected, and lived to the fullest. I believe that, despite our limited lifespans, we have much to hope for and many goals worth achieving. I believe that being on our own, being part of the cosmos, ennobles rather than diminishes us and makes our conscious existence far more wonderful. I believe in the sublime. I believe that the most valuable and important things are not tangible. And I believe that atheism offers at least as much chance for happiness and fulfillment as any religion ever could, and that it is fully compatible with all the things - compassion, joy, love, hope and awe - that define humanity and make life worthwhile. In fact, I firmly believe that atheism makes life in general, and especially conscious, intelligent, thinking, feeling life such as ours, by far the most precious thing there is.
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  Big Dog

  I hear what you guys are saying but for the moment it is affecting me the opposite way. I remember a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon where Calvin asks his imaginary tiger friend Hobbes why he thought we were here and Hobbes replies, to devour each other alive. I guess that's how I see it for the moment, if we are not special, no spark of the divine, we are nothing but another species of animal struggling to survive and not be devoured.

  I guess its a half full, half empty thing for me right now, and unfortunately I am seeing it as half empty at this point. As Mysterious pointed out that could and hopefully will change over time as I come to grips with it, but for me, all this talk of the wonderful meaning of life sounds a lot like the bible toters spiel, only without the payoff, its like a circular thing, yes life actually has no meaning other than to survive and act out our genetic codes, but we give it meaning, therefore it has meaning and so on. I think this is going to take awhile.
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  doogie

  hey BD,

  i'll be honest, i haven't read through this entire thread yet (i hate it when people say that... how hard is it to keep your proverbial mouth shut for the few friggin minutes it takes to read a couple of paragraphs? anyhoo...)

  i'm not gonna lie...i've felt the same way that you described at times. not so much anymore. i have zero advice for you, but it did remind me of something i read awhile ago (please forgive me if someone has already posted this...). it's something that Carl Sagan's wife wrote about him after he died. i think it's beautiful:

  When my husband died, because he was so famous and known for not being a believer, many people would come up to me-it still sometimes happens-and ask me if Carl changed at the end and converted to a belief in an afterlife. They also frequently ask me if I think I will see him again. Carl faced his death with unflagging courage and never sought refuge in illusions. The tragedy was that we knew we would never see each other again. I don't ever expect to be reunited with Carl. But, the great thing is that when we were together, for nearly twenty years, we lived with a vivid appreciation of how brief and precious life is. We never trivialized the meaning of death by pretending it was anything other than a final parting. Every single moment that we were alive and we were together was miraculous-not miraculous in the sense of inexplicable or supernatural. We knew we were beneficiaries of chance. . . . That pure chance could be so generous and so kind. . . . That we could find each other, as Carl wrote so beautifully in Cosmos, you know, in the vastness of space and the immensity of time. . . . That we could be together for twenty years. That is something which sustains me and it's much more meaningful. . . . The way he treated me and the way I treated him, the way we took care of each other and our family, while he lived. That is so much more important than the idea I will see him someday. I don't think I'll ever see Carl again. But I saw him. We saw each other. We found each other in the cosmos, and that was wonderful.

  later, man.
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  Big Dog

  Thanks Doog, that was very cool, mucho appreciated.
• 

  Big Dog

  Also, just wanted to say thanks to everyone else that responded, KLS, Kid-A Robert, Doof, Dave, Dez, SNG, Auld, Seeker, Kiddotan, Dan, Dazz, Mysterious, and of course Tetragod, your imput was well taken and accepted in the spirit given, thanks again!
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  AlmostAtheist

  I miss him, I used to take comfort from hoping he was in a better place and that maybe he was sort of watching over me, but now I am beginning to think that is all bunk, when he closed his eyes that last time and drew his last breath, that was it, nothing, no more. Everything he knew, every memory he had gone when the neurons stopped firing. I was thinking of my children, they are going to watch me go someday and the whole cycle of it, I watch them come into being and they watch me exit just brought me down.

  Sorry to come in late on this, my prayer meeting ran over last night. :-)

  I am SO sorry for your loss. Since I gave up a hope for the afterlife, I have felt death oh-so keenly. I really had a pretty blase' attitude toward death before. But it means so much more now. As stupid as it may sound, I regret that I never got to meet Douglas Adams, and never will. And I hate that he died before his time.

  I guess in all the "majesty/glory" talk -- without the knowledge of your recent loss -- I never addressed the fact that yeah, death sucks. Your own death, not so much. You don't want to die, but you accept it. But accepting the death of others isn't so easy. I don't know what to say, except that I really liked that Sagan's wife quote. Well put, good perspective.

  I guess in the final analysis, reality sometimes sucks and sometimes it bites you in the ass, but it NEVER lies to you, or asks you to lie to yourself in order to accept it. There's great comfort and satisfaction in that.

  Take care, good sir.

  Dave