Words at the right moment.

bebu

Yesterday one of my sons had a seizure while getting ready for school in the morning. This is the second time such a thing has taken place, the first time was his being on the way to school a couple of weeks ago--but due to circumstances it was suspected to be related to a possible heart problem, and not a seizure after all.

When my other son came into our room to let us know something crazy was going on, my husband raced upstairs and realized it was a grand mal. He helped clear the area, and held my son's head in his arms. Our son didn't, of course, realize anything about what was going on, as he was well glazed-over, so to speak.

From time to time my husband bent to kiss him on the cheek, and spoke softly to relax. At one point it appeared that our son was coming to, in a sense, and looking greatly alarmed and confused, and he began to struggle. My husband said, "Son, it's okay, it's okay", but our son still struggled. Then, with a louder voice suddenly filled with such authority and certainty--the most assuringly gentle voice I've ever heard in my life!--he said, "REALLY...! It's ALRIGHT." And he leaned over and kissed him again.

It sounded exactly as if the man were announcing an eternal truth: very powerfully yet very calmly, not only to our son but to the world. And the immediate effects seemed to confirm his words. Our son "looked" at his dad, stopped struggling, closed his eyes and began to sleep ( (he doesn't recall his father being with him at all; I was the one who was with him when he finally woke up). All my own fear melted and disappeared.

There are a lot of odd details one remembers about certain unusual events in life. Almost every other detail about yesterday morning I can honestly imagine that I could forget (my memory is so bad, this is actually a given). But my husband's voice at that moment, and those kisses, they have eclipsed everything else already in a sense.

It's alright.

bebu

tall penguin

Beautiful.
tp

tall penguin

Beautiful.
tp

jeeprube

I'm sorry to hear about your son! May God be with your family.

Lady Lee

awww ya got me all teary-eyed.

Make sure your son sees a doctor.

I usually roll a person onto their side and put a pillow under their head (or whatever is soft so they won't hurt themselves. But you might want to check to see how best to handle it if he has another seizure

Now where is Big Tex when we need him?.

mouthy

Boy! will you give your hubby a big hug from me? I wish I had him around when my son used to take them...I would panic!!! I was useless. I had my son with Grand Mal & a daughter with Peti mal. Thank you for sharing that--- Hugs to you & the boy also.. It was good to read it.( sorry the event happened though-hope it wont again ) Is he on Dilantin & I forget the other one he was on

bebu

He has an appt tomorrow with a neurologist, Lee.

(BTW, mouthy, he's on tegretin.)

Thanks for your comments, all.

Sometimes we parents say "it's alright!" but are still very doubtful. (Such is how it would have been if I had been handling it!) "It's alright!" is often just a coverup of a bad situation, or else it is just what we hope. My husband is a PA, so I already looked to him for reassurance on another, more honest level. I feel I got even more than that, though.

bebu

mouthy

My husband is a PA

Could you tell this dummy what that is????

forsharry

that was truly a tale that brought tears to my eyes. I'm sorry your son is suffering so, hope that can get resolved as soon as possible. My cousin suffered a grand mal seizure when I was visiting her one day, and even though I knew all about her epilepsy and what to expect, the experience was terrifying. I don't know where your hubby got that assurance and absolutely certainty from in saying "IT'S ALRIGHT," but it was just what was needed for everyone. I know I personally could have used that years ago with my cousin.

crosseye

Big Tex

((bebu))

I'm sorry to hear about your son. It's one thing when it's us, but it's another when it's our child. Your post reminded of when Jackson (my son) suffered from something called post-viral arthritis (lasts 6-8 weeks and then goes away). It acts like rheumatoid arthritis moving from joint to joint and left him literally screaming in agony. There was nothing we could do but keep him propped up so there was no movement. But when the arthritis traveled it was very painful, and we were often left with the exact scenario as you and your husband.

It is difficult for a child so young to logically understand what is happening, and so there is much fear. The need for reassurance is as real as the need for food and water. Fear can, and will, only make matters worse. Having someone strong and trustworthy address the fear is a gift.

In some ways there are spiritual overtones as well. We all have our own anxiety, buried deep, many times not knowing what the answer may be. We can cast about truly hurting ourselves because of this fear. And yet the magical power of the phrase "It's okay" is a gift of grace. Your son, as mine did before, needed someone to not only say it, but to make it so. Their belief sealed it and as fear ebbed, they were safe and okay.

Your story is a tremendous example of the power of love. Give him a hug for me.

Be well,

Chris

Words at the right moment.

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