FALL CLASSES FOR WOMEN
Maps for beginners
All those lines and colors! Pretty, yes, but what can it all mean? Representing the three-dimensional world on a two-dimensional surface is an ancient and mystical art, but maps have practical applications even today. Session 1 introduces the concept of maps, along with basic map-reading techniques such as rotating a map to coincide with the direction you are facing. Session 2 is held at a local shopping mall, where participants will create their own maps of the routes among various stores, followed by navigation practice. Session 3 (advanced techniques) is held at an undisclosed location, which participants find with the use of maps provided in Session 2.
Session 1: Monday 7-9pm. Session 2: Wednesday 7-9pm. Session 3 is scheduled for Saturday 11am, but has yet to be successfully held.
Shopping and the art of motorcycle maintenance
Following a brief introduction, participants will be split up and spend four-hour individual sessions in a garage, observing a mechanic change a single spark plug. You will learn not to ask why a simple task must take all afternoon, and to reply without sarcasm when asked for your opinion about the correct choice of plug, tools, torque, and whether this particular motorcycle “makes me look fat.” Afterwards, the group will reconvene to discuss why your presence was necessary and whether this course has any point whatsoever.
5-hour sessions, Saturdays 1-6pm, for the rest of your life.
Toilet seat fundamentals
Lowering a toilet seat when necessary can be confusing and intimidating, but with practice anyone can do it. A practical, hands-on workshop is followed by a group discussion of ways to deal with the irrational stress that so often accompanies the need to perform this simple, but common, household task.
Single 2-hour session, alternate Wednesdays at 7pm.
Thinking ahead: Everyday situations
The world is a busy place with many things happening at once, but with practice you can build awareness of the maelstrom of activity around you, and even learn to be ready for what comes next. This series of workshops includes field trips to public places, where you will learn how to prepare for that startling moment when payment is formally requested at a store, and how to identify a good location in a busy environment to stand and chat. Participants will attempt to disembark an escalator into a group of stationary men, followed by a group discussion in the middle of the busiest aisle available to identify what practical lessons we might have learned.
Four sessions, Thursdays 7-9pm. For session 3, participants should bring their largest handbag, with a wallet and a minimum of 35 other small items.
Yes, but what does he really mean?
Communication is vital to any relationship, but women soon realize that it isn’t so simple: correctly interpreting what is said, as well as what is not said, is a daily challenge. So too is composing comments or questions peripherally related to what you really want to know, to prompt responses suitable for further analysis. These workshops introduce techniques for indirect and oblique communication, to help you unlock the hidden meaning behind yawns, snores, and such deceptively offhand comments as “I think I’ll mow the lawn.”
Five 2-hour sessions, Tuesdays 7-9pm. Participants should prepare by asking innocuous questions of their partners and recording the responses for analysis by the group.
Parallel parking: Is it for you?
An introduction to the valuable concept of cost-benefit analysis, focused on this ordinary yet frightfully complex driving task. Participants will maneuver a real automobile into a parallel parking spot, and the time elapsed will be compared to the time required to walk from a simpler, perpendicular spot farther away. Sessions conclude with personalized evaluations of the risk and cost of damage to your car and others.
Single session (four participant limit), lasting at least 2 but possibly up to 12 hours. Starts 8am Saturdays (just in case).
Important classes for Men: Please review and pass on to loved ones
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