"daniel you are looking for Jehovah to talk to you? You need to fall of a cliff to believe in gravity? You need to HEAR the wind to know that it is blowing?"
I'm not doubting the existence of God - just doubting that I really know who he is and what I've been told about him is true. Thanks for using the old wind analogy. I've just been in the "truth" for lets see here... all my life, and never heard that one before. [/sarcasm]
My argument still stands. If God expects me to have faith like Abraham, than He should treat me the same way he did with him. It just seems a little odd, and convenient, that there are no real, personal relationships with God, there are no miracles anymore, but just a book of stories. God more often resembles a construct of the Unknown inside our brains. I'm not saying God does not exist, but that most people in the world, including me, are greatly confused about WHO he is, and WHAT the hell is going on. The end result is this: faith is ALWAYS blind faith. They don't call it a "leap" for nothing.
And if we all have - or should have - our own relationship with Jehovah, wouldn't we have our own conscience? and be interpreting the Bible for ourselves? - but no, there is only one interpretation - the WTS's, but it still comes down to the fact that we ALL believe in what we want to. It comes down to what we gloss over and what we take to heart. Like you, Defd, for some reason you choose not to obey the FDS council on acossiating with apostates. He who is faithful in what is least is faithful in much, right? Do you really feel like you know Jehovah, or is it a construct of all the Unknown forces in the universe encapsulated in religious fervor? You don't have to reply, I know what you'll say.
You see, at one time in my life I had a near-death experience. No, I didn't see any lights of glorious hallways, or anything like that. It was just all going black - but what survivied was this wonderful comforting feeling - which I thought was Jehovah helping me. However, I had no blood in me (of course no transfusion), and when you have no blood, your brain shuts down a lot of functions like physical pain, etc. It feels like your'e on a heavy painkiller - there is no pain and little emotion. So when I think Jehovah is there for me, there is always some other thing that can explain it. I would rather believe Jehovah was there and making me feel those things, but I still can't get beyond the fact that those are just the inevitable results when your body is losing too much blood.
Its a great irony that coming close to death is what messed up my relationship with God, not the other way around.
