I have been a people-pleaser for almost all of my life, but finally made the decision to find out what is right for me. I still struggle with the people-pleasing thing, but at least I no longer believe other people's beliefs just to make them happy. I wouldn't really call myself a god-pleaser either. I am more focused on myself, and finding what is right for me, what works for me. I keep focusing on myself, improving myself, loving myself, and isn't that what God would want us to do? So maybe in a way I am a god-pleaser...
Stop following others!
by hibiscusfire 65 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Sunspot
***Do you know that the Bible commands us to love others,
Yes, as a 30 year-JW, I am aware of that. I have left the devious and lying control of the evil WTS cult.....and I STILL love others.
***On the otherhand, we must not allow people to manipulate and control us to the point that we are never free to be who we are.
The name of the game IS control over JWs by their Mother. I got tired of BEING manipulated and told where to go and where not to go and how many times a week and when to study their publications, etc, etc,etc.
I don't know where you're coming from because I've never read one of your threads.....so maybe you aren't pushing the WTS faulty teachings, but this was the impression I got, especially since you were asked about DFed! What is the connection between you?
Gopher.....I LOVE "Garden Party"....it's one of my favorites!!!! Thanks for posting the lyrics here.....
Annie
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one of 12
To hibi and all others;
I'm a hubby pleaser and whatever is best for the ultimate happiness of my imediate family.Luckly it's the same for me!!!!!
Others peoples opinion of my family does effect me though . I thought that this forum was a place where we could safely view our feelings and concerns without the snide remarks that so remind me of my witness family. Where is the LOVE???????????????????????????
Jennine -
Eyebrow2
IM A WIFE PLEASER IT'S SAFER THAT WAY
What a good boy you are. And smart toAhhh...see now that is smart heehee.....
I don't worry about what god may or may not think of me...as far as people, yes there are a few people that I do care what they think of me. But I wouldn't chuck my integrity out the window, if one of them challenge me on something I felt was an issue of principle...for example, my best friend is very religious and believes in the big guy in the sky. Well, I don't, and won't pretend to for her sake. And she doesn't have to agree with me or pretend to not believe in God for my sake.
There are times when I have to rethink my behavior, and will make adjustments...like, being careful about my language around certain people. I don't see this as a principle thing at all. I do swear occaisionally, but not around those that I know it will offend, nor around my kids. To me, that is just being polite.
Regarding stop following others: if you find someone that lives a decent life, and offers some good advice to you on how you can be happy, what is the harm in following them, as long as it is within what you want to accomplish in your life? Don't be a joiner, just to be liked, but don't discount learning from others just because they may have good advice to follow that you didn't find in the bible or other works of fiction first.
Thats just me....
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delilah
I know who I am, and I like myself better now, than I ever have. My husband and my family come first and foremost in my life, not an organization.I have never followed others, in order to fit in with the "in" crowd. I thought it funny, those who did, were constantly changing their attire, their home decor, the way they talked, JUST to fit in. How boring!!! I suppose I've been a people-pleaser, to an extent. My profession is such that I have to be. When I was a practising JW, I did my very best to please God, but it was never good enough, according to those who were in control, so I finally left.
I know now, that i'm a good person, the kind that a God would approve of. I like people, and I treat them with respect and kindness, the same as I would expect to be treated.
BTW, Hi Hibi....
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hibiscusfire
Sometimes pleasing yourself can kill you.
Hibie
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LittleToe
Sometimes pleasing yourself can kill you.
Sometimes pleasing others can kill you.
Sometimes pleasing God can kill you.
Sometimes pleasing can kill you.
Sometimes others can kill you.
Sometimes YOU can kill you.
Sometimes God can kill you.
Sometimes can kill you.
Sometimes kill you.
Sometimes you.
Sometimes.
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hibiscusfire
No really LT. Sometimes people think they know what is good for them but it's not and they end up in trouble because they were ignorant of the experiences of others because they wanted to please themselves.
HIBE
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jgnat
Hibie, it is obvious that you have not spent a lot of time in self-reflection. I conclude that you are blind to your own weaknesses. Blind people cannot lead.
Pleasure in itself is not bad. God created the whole earth and called it good. There are many examples of activites in the bible that God and Jesus took pleasure in. Good natural pleasures include, I believe, eating, drinking, working, learning, resting, singing, building, playing, watching a sunset, watching a sunrise, hugging, dancing, gazing at the stars, gazing at the mountains, creating, telling stories, loving our children, loving our loving parents, loving our partner, and sex. I suggest rather that evil is introduced when the basic pleasures of life are perverted or twisted.
Based on your past record, I suppose you will try to prove me wrong with a verbal attack. That still won't fix your fundamental problem. Physician heal thyself.
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hibiscusfire
believe, eating, drinking, working, learning, resting, singing, building, playing, watching a sunset, watching a sunrise, hugging, dancing, gazing at the stars, gazing at the mountains, creating, telling stories, loving our children, loving our loving parents, loving our partner, and sex.
I actually was referring to drugs and alcohol. Some people are destroying themselves this way. Isn't that pleasing themselves?
Hibie