Hi to all. If you have followed our story you know we were moving out of state to start over and get away from tons of extended JW family.
We are officially moved. Hundreds of miles away from our old life. As I write this, I feel numb, cold, and very raw. I am heartbroken at what I've had to leave behind, but I'm also very grateful that I at least get my husband and kids to walk away with. (not that I am underestimating this, because I know how lucky I am to have this.) I also have all of you.
It's so strange how we all come together here and share such deep, personal thoughts and experiences, and yet I wouldn't know the majority of you if you passed me on a sidewalk.
One thing to note - ITIS's brother helped us move and we basically told him why we were leaving. His response was priceless! He said "that is the best thing anyone in my family could have ever told me." Seems that he's wanted to leave for years but couldn't bare to loose all his family. He is one of those super smart people who just "knew" it was wrong from day one, and didn't feel the need to do a lot of research. He was really impressed with all the research hubby and I had done though. So, he will probably be joining us shortly in our new area. Cool huh?
Things I've learned thus far in this journey: (wanderlust's post was fabulous........haven't gotten as far as him yet...)
- I've learned to listen to my gut. It's always right.
- My judgement calls have validity. My opinions and feelings have merit and should be heard.
- I can love people unconditionally even if they place constraints on their affections for me.
- I CAN stand on my own two feet for the first time in my life. It's me who's looking out for me, and no one else when it comes down to the nitty-gritty.
-People. People are the only things that are really important to me. At the end of the day, I don't care where I live, what car I drive, or what income bracket I am in. People are what inspire me and keep me going.
I wrote this a lone time ago and found it recently. I wrote it when I was going through another major journey in my life and for some reason I wrote it then and didn't quite understand it until now.......took me 10 years to figure this one out...
...........and as she crawled up next to me,
she crawled inside of me.
......and then her, of herself, one thought
started to swallow me without even chewing.
......and then her thought became of one - me.
love, freedomlover