why cant you just leave???

by kid-A 22 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Dune

  1) Leaving is not as easy as it sounds, you have to keep in mind that this is everything most of us have. You know how they tell you not to make friends with worldly people along with a whole slew of other things? That in itself is a dilemna, because if i were to leave now i'd essentially be alone because the friends i did make are only acquaintances (sp).

  2) I only have two family members that are witnesses, leaving might hurt one of them, but the other wouldnt be affected as much because he seems to be pondering his future as a witness too.

  3) Do you think that by delaying your escape you are simply getting deeper and deeper into the WTS web and ultimately making the final step all the more complicated?

  Despite all this "Light" i've been receiving, there is still a part of me that really just wants to forget about JWD and just live the rest of my life as a JW. I've met ministerial servants and elders on this board who know everything thats wrong with the WTS and still refuse to leave. I dont know about you guys, but 3 hours a week of field service and 5 hours a week of meetings really means nothing to me. I can honestly see myself becoming an elder one day and not believing a word i spew out in the service meeting and not feel any moral obligation to anyone.

  Ask yourself a question , if you could give a group of people a false sense of hope and happiness in an otherwise lackluster and mediocre existence, wouldnt you do it?
• 

  IP_SEC

  Leaving is not as easy as it sounds, you have to keep in mind that this is everything most of us have.

  Yes it is, you just have to grow a sack and then do it.

  What would you rather have, one sucker punch to the gut (leave) or some big hairy dude that constantly follows you around slapping you on the back of the head (fade)?

  I lost family, and it hurt, but you move on and make a new family.

  Now thats not to say that a person learns the truth isnt the truth and then DAs the next day. It takes time to get all the little duckies in a row. You have the power to block before the guy sucker punches you.
• 

  kid-A

  What would you rather have, one sucker punch to the gut (leave) or some big hairy dude that constantly follows you around slapping you on the back of the head (fade)? I lost family, and it hurt, but you move on and make a new family.

  Yes, exactly. To use a crude analogy, its the difference between slowly peeling the band-aid off one millimeter at a time, or just ripping it off in one painful but QUICK motion. One other point I would raise is developing the ability to realize that many relationships we have built in the borg are illusory and built upon sand (yes, even sometimes with family)....why? Because the love that is displayed by most (not all) JWs is entirely conditional, with many strings attached.

  Our parents love us if we go to the meetings and listen to the elders, our friends hang out with us as long as we conform to WTS regulations, etc etc. The whole sickening charade is based upon the central tenet of JW teachings, god loves us but ONLY if we obey the watchtower corporation.

  Even if these relationships were built up over many many years, I would argue that any relationship built on false premises are illusions waiting to be destroyed and hopefully replaced by real relationships with most likely, non-jws.
• 

  bigmouth

  " Its very difficult for people to walk away from things they have a heavy investment in."-stevenyc.
  
  Yes, there are all the emotions that go with a long relationship. The IDEA of leaving can be more painful than the reality.
  
  Ask a battered woman why she continues to stay with the creep that beats her.
• 

  stillajwexelder

  1) how and why do you keep up the facade? Do your circumstances really justify lying to yourself and family? THEOCRATIC WARFARE STRATEGY - It gives me a great feeling knowing I am playing them at their own game -the GB have a facade - they know much of what they say is just horse s---t, yet they continue so why shouldn't I ?

  2) Are you aware you are just prolonging the misery of yourself and family by living this illusion? THEOCRATIC WARFARE STRATEGY - NO I am not prolonging the misery- I am having great fumn doing it. I am thumbing my nose up at them - I am laughing at their "superior attitude"

  3) Do you think that by delaying your escape you are simply getting deeper and deeper into the WTS web and ultimately making the final step all the more complicated? THEOCRATIC WARFARE STRATEGY - not at all - fian lstep will be at a date and time and circumstances of my choosing - if ever
• 

  stillconcerned

  Do you have family?

  Kids?

  Are you teaching them the WT line? What if they believe?
• 

  stillconcerned

  
  
  
  

  This is EXACTLY what i thought, as i read some posts.

  I once dated a guy who was a COMPLETE dead end (for me), but i was emotionally way in, so i kept saying/rationalizing to self, "after Christmas....errrrrr after Valentines day....well now it's his Birthday, so....maybe over SUMMER would be easier..."

  It's never gonna be easy.
• 

  Billygoat

  Sometimes it's not about what's easiest for us. It's about being in a position of influence and power in an effort to save those that are still in. If I were in that position, you can damn well know that I would be putting up a front just to influence them and educate them.
• 

  IronClaw

  Despite all this "Light" i've been receiving, there is still a part of me that really just wants to forget about JWD and just live the rest of my life as a JW. I've met ministerial servants and elders on this board who know everything thats wrong with the WTS and still refuse to leave. I dont know about you guys, but 3 hours a week of field service and 5 hours a week of meetings really means nothing to me. I can honestly see myself becoming an elder one day and not believing a word i spew out in the service meeting and not feel any moral obligation to anyone.

  Ask yourself a question , if you could give a group of people a false sense of hope and happiness in an otherwise lackluster and mediocre existence, wouldnt you do it?

  If you did this then you would be living a lie. You would be as fake as the Relgion itself. There is a word for this: Hypocrite.
• 

  ferret

  I would recommend fading over df.ing or da.ing. Much less painful if you have family in. If I had it to do over again that would be my choice. But all cases are different.