Excerpts from the Queen Mother's Book of Remembrance
The following are entries made by the British public in special books left in churches and cathedrals shortly after the death of HRH Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother
> "She was one of the old school, all the remaining royals are shit"
> J.Clement. Grantham.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I thought she would never die, she has let us all down very badly"
> D.Holmes, Somerset.
>
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> "She was a trooper and she never gave up. I remember one time she was
> visiting a school and I asked her if she would like to make a visit to
> the cloakroom before she left. 'No' she replied, 'I didn't give in to
> the Nazis and I won't give in to the bladder'. That's how she was, a
> fighter, who refused to be beaten by anything. She pissed herself
later though"
> B. Forrester, North Yorkshire.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "She was a marvellous woman, and a wonderful lover".
> L. J.Worthington, Penrith.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I am absolutely devastated, at least we could have got the day off".
> S.Wilson, Bristol.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> "How refreshing to be able to mourn the death of a member of the Royal
> family without being accused of being homosexual". J. Fletcher, High
> Wycombe.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> "Her death should act as a warning to others who think it is cool to
> experiment with drugs".
> E. Franks, Cheshire.
>
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>
> "On behalf of all blacks, I send the sincerest condolences".
> T.Watson, Ilford.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "Once again the Queen is not upset enough for my liking, the woman
> should have a bit more compassion, how would she feel if it was her
> mother?"
> W.Waugh, Richmond.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "It is such a loss, God has shat on our heads".
> K. O'Neil, Inverness.
> "I am sure the Queen Mum will not let this setback put an end to her
> public duties". N. Wallace, Swansea.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I hold Princess Margaret in no small way responsible for this
terrible event"
> E. Thompson, West Lothian.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "Bomb Iraq for us Tony, its the only thing that will make us feel
> better"
> P.McGregor, Southampton.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "We must do all we can, send blankets, food parcels, jumpers, anything
> to help these brave souls who are queuing up to walk past her coffin".
> R. Thompson, Bath.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "I have been unable to masturbate for five days, and will not do so
> again until her majesty is buried"
> E. Gorman, Derbyshire.
>
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".
> R. Combes, Romford.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "No matter how she felt, no matter the situation, she always wore a
> smile. Just like a retard"
> G. Hollins, East Sussex.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> "I remember she came to visit us in the East End one time. She was so
> kind, so generous and so sweet. She whispered softly in my ear, 'you
> know its not true' she said, 'you don't smell of shit'. She was a
> wondrous person". E.Collier, London.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> "Whichever way you look at it, it just is not as exciting as Diana".
> G.Williams, West Midlands.
>
> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> "She was one of us, and by that I don't mean she perpetrated insurance
> fraud or lied about expense claims. She was like us in a good way. God
> bless you ma'am". L. Weller, Harlow.
>
"She had such a difficult life, always battling against adversity and
misfortune. Let us hope that if there is a next time round she is
given a life of privilege and comfort" T.D.Wainwright, Hastings.
This one gets me everytime 
