how have YOU changed since leaving? (page 2)

teejay

Welcome, Karie. We're glad you found us. Sounds to me like you're on your way to full recovery. We look forward to your posts and comments.

Again, welcome.

peace,
tj

OOps I hit the wrong button on my other post to this subject , sorry about that. I've changed alot in a short period of time. As a witness I was always worried about stumbling others and bringing reproach to Jah's name. I thought I had to be nice and perfect and that my kids should be too. ( We had to set a ggod example for others). If I said or did something wrong , I'd feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. I would think that my actions might prevent a worldly person from studying. I was constantly worried about what others thought of me.
Now , I just don't care anymore. It's hard to describe the freedom I feel . Its such a weight off my shoulders. I'm happier, my kids are way happier. I still want to be a good person and I still feel bad when I make a thoughtless remark but I no longer have the awesome feeling of responsibility of having to be PERFECT.

jurs

hungry4life

This is my first post. I have not been to a meeting in 3 years and have been lurking on this site for about 4 months. After leaving the org I returned to college and learned to think critically again, it's a whole new world out here. I have made genuine friends and gotten close to my family again. I am a better mother no longer punishing my children for normal behavior,just because someone else expects it. I have a job that I love and true purpose in my life (no more wasting gas going door to door hoping to feel something). I look at people with a more open mind I appreciate their differences and am much less judgemental. I ask questions without fear,enjoy weekend family time without guilt and feel strength like I have never known. Yes it has been difficult but well worth it.

Eyebrow

I sleep past 9AM on Saturday and Sunday mornings without feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

I don't wear nylons any longer!

Tina

wow! great question!
My attitudes are so much more global than when I was a dub.
I'm much more tolerant,appreciate and love the diversity of people and their thoughts.I respect the differences,and preserve the uniqueness of every individual. Diversity is the strength and source of growth.

Don't live with fear and guilt. Especially regarding the Big A cloud that hung over my life.
Don't live with the feeling of never doing enough or being good enough.
Don't have the 'us vs. them' mentality,that I'm special and the rest are birdfood.
Don't live with second class status and found it's perfectly right and good to 'run ahead' - to work and achieve whatever I want . I've learned to eliminate status/class differentials.

Honoring fully my talents and abilities to the full so I can give back to my world and community.
I've learned real love and friendship.Honest opening and caring interaction.
I've learned that living means always experiencing,developing and growing. That change is a process,not an event.

Love means never having to wear a headcovering! Tina

Shaneliza

I have a 'live and let live' attitude.

Esmeralda

To answer the original question: I am so much more happy than I was. So much more able to give of myself to others because I am free to be myself: not always depressed because of not fitting into the 'new personality' as the congregation would dictate. I know who I am now, and I am satisfied with that. I am a lot more comfortable with others because I'm content with my own life. Does that make sense? It's late!

Karie, I wanted to say welcome to the board and keep talking. It's very theraputic. There is a great e mail group for women that I can recommend if you're interested in signing up for it, you can e mail me and I'll send you the link.

Many aspects of your story reminded me of my own, and that of many others I know. I'm so glad that you got out. Every time I hear of a woman escaping an abusive relationship my heart soars.

I wish you health and happiness and joy in your newfound freedom!
*hugs*
esmeralda
www.wtsurvivors.homestead.com

Princess

Eyebrow, lol, I love the nylons comment. I couldn't even bring myself to wear them as a bridesmaid in my brother's wedding!

Celebrating birthdays and holidays seems as normal as can be.

I never feel guilty over anything. My favorite change by far.

I don't think of people as "worldly".

I think dubs are the creepy weirdos now.

Princess

Tina

bttt

how have YOU changed since leaving?

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