Men are happier...this is soooo funny, but true...

by coffee_black 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • coffee_black
    coffee_black

    This was emailed to me....had to share! Enjoy!

    Coffee

    Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
    Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
    Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
    You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
    You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
    You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
    No wonder men are happier.

  • Highlander
    Highlander

    Except for the dying sooner than women part, Thank god I'm a man!!!

  • THE GLADIATOR
    THE GLADIATOR

    Coffee

    We are truly magnificent and functional creatures. Gladiators are even more perfected. To see me in action is awesome.

    Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

    I wait until the sales. I can get six for that vast amount of money.

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    As an orthodox Jew once said to me"Thank God I am not a woman; thank God I am not a Gentile"

  • lola28
    lola28

    LOL@Gladiator.

    Welcome to the board.

    lola

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    i dont look good in shorts

    but i look ok in a kilt

    go figure

  • seven006
    seven006

    “Except for the dying sooner than women part, Thank god I'm a man!!!”

    There is an old saying about that. On average, why do men die at least seven years before their wife does?”

    Because they want to.

    Dave

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    If women want to spend a lot of money on fashion for cloths and shoes and all sorts of accessories if they are that much self conscious that is a problem of their own making. It makes the commerce people happy.

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo
    If women want to spend a lot of money on fashion for cloths and shoes and all sorts of accessories if they are that much self conscious that is a problem of their own making. It makes the commerce people happy.

    well it makes me happy too

  • Tigerman
    Tigerman

    As long as I keep my woman happy then everything is okay . . .and that's the way it should be.

    No, I'm NOT pw.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit